Windsornot's Other Journal

Only the legacy remains...

2010-03-16T11:25:00.002-04:00

I hadn't realized that the last time I wrote on here was in November 2008.

After testing for my 5th mid-term in the 1st degree curriculum, I called it quits.

I had been trying to balance my new job, at the time, that was about to increase its hours with TKD time and family time. It just wasn't working. To add to that. I was just not finding TKD that much fun anymore. My body hurt too much, between my knees and back. It was time to walk away.

That was in December 2008.

It is now March 2010. I don't regret walking away. While I miss my friends at the ATA, and I still enjoy martial arts, my body is just not in any shape to do it anymore. I did gain some weight after stopping, and I'm working on ways to get back in shape that won't tax my knees so much. I know that I'll always be welcome to go back, but I don't forsee that anytime in the future. Ironically enough, I ended up getting laid off from said job, and so I suppose I could go to the one or two day classes, but it costs money I don't have right now, and even if I did, I'm putting my energies elsewhere trying to find a new job while going back to school. Right now, my intellectual education is more important than my physical education.

Do I regret my years in taekwondo and the ATA? No, not at all. I do regret that Drew doesn't continue with it. He was able to graduate to brown belt before he quit. And yet, due to his great love of Star Wars these days, runs around doing martial arts moves worthy of any great Jedi, but doesn't want to go back, even if it's a different martial arts school or form. Oh well. Maybe he'll change his mind.

For both of us, I think we learned about a great way to physically exercise and learned how to discipline ourselves. There's times that Drew will snap into place with the "Yes, ma'am!" or "Yes, sir!" or have a take charge attitude that he would've learned over there. I find myself still acting like an instructor trainee outside of the do-jahng. So in that respect, we got some good out of it for both of us.

For myself, I think the accomplishments I made were ones that I needed to make. I needed to earn that black belt. I needed to earn those titles, especially that state championship. I didn't think that I could ever do that. My black belt certificate is framed and sits in my dining room. It is a reminder that I can achieve many things if I choose to do it, and put the work into it.

Now, instead of trying to get to my 2nd degree black belt, my goal is to earn a Master's degree in Professional and Technical Communications at NJIT. I'm still getting through my first semester of the graduate certificate program first, but I think I'm on my way, and just have to remind myself that if a person at my age with a bum knee could earn a black belt and a state title, then I can definitely earn this Master's degree as well.

To anyone reading this who is interested in martial arts, don't see this as the end of a story-- it's the beginning. If you love martial arts, keep doing it. While I really can't practice it anymore, I still believe in the power of learning it, and how it really can enable you.

Decision...for now

2008-11-08T12:52:00.002-05:00

After some thought, and consulting with the hubby and my good TKD buddy Sandy, I came to the following decision. Drew will take his break. It may be permanent, and it may not, we'll see. I decided for myself that I will continue for the next two months (which equals a cycle), at least until the end of the year, and then make a decision about myself, whether to continue or not. I guess on the plus side, I can go back to adult/teen classes again, and have to contend with a bunch of grade school kids all the time. Even when telling SW that Drew was taking a break, I didn't say anything about myself other than applying Drew's tuition to myself next month instead. She pretty much responded that it wasn't a problem, that Drew is one of those kids that needs breaks and he always comes back doing better, so it was fine. She also added that she didn't want me to feel that just because Drew was taking a break that I needed to take a break too because "you like it for yourself", as she said. I didn't admit to her how I haven't been too thrilled for months and the temptations of stopping or going somewhere else. I just nodded and said that's why I'm still going, and at least perhaps with the adult classes, I might have the cameraderie back with the teens and adults, and I'll be more challenged again, even with the "boring stuff". We'll see. I'll take it one week at a time.

So there you go. Perhaps the winding down of an era, perhaps not. Only time will tell.

TKD dilemma, shredder style

2008-11-06T21:57:00.004-05:00

(Crossposted from my regular blog with some edits.)

I'm upset tonight about Drew and TKD. Or should I say, Drew and not TKD. Drew had been good all day on his day off from school, according to his father, no problems. He was even cooperative when I got home and had him getting ready for TKD class. I don't know what happened completely, but when we got to the ATA, Drew had some sort of misconception that today was the Weapons Camp (which is not until the day after Thanksgiving). I don't know where he got that idea, and he flipped out. When I explained it was regular class today, he continued to cry and flip out, and even in getting him to calm down and try to talk about it, he kept saying that he hated TKD, and wanted a break. Well, I tried to convince him that he wouldn't be allowed to go to Weapons Camp if he didn't go to classes, but he didn't care. No matter what I tried to do to get him to take class, it just wasn't going to work. The best thing to do was just to pack up before even starting class, and go home.

On the way home, I kept asking and giving him leading questions as to why he didn't want to cooperate. He constantly gives mixed signals. He likes class sometimes, loves the weapons especially, but hates doing the other stuff. He wants to be a student helper, but he doesn't want his black belt. He doesn't understand why he has to do Songham #4 form again when he's done it already and it's "easy". (Well, for one thing, he only did the half form before...but I digress.) We didn't come to much of a resolution in discussing it in the car, so the conversation was continued when we got home.

Once home, we included the DH in the conversation, and I was trying to get Drew to make a commitment that after a cycle break (2 months), he'd start again in January. He was hesitant, and saying he hated it. Now, the kid's got some talent in this, and can enjoy it, some I'm getting frustrated and confused. DH was reminding me that's he's 7 and doesn't know what he wants, and we'll make him. I reminded DH that he doesn't take Drew to TKD classes, and doesn't have to fight with him when things go awry. I'm just tired of Drew going in and out, in and out for months at a time. I have no problem giving him a summer break, or giving him a break now and then as long as he can be committed to classes. Otherwise, why put me through a 2 month break only to have him go for 2 months, then take another break? I'm tired of the years of see-sawing, adjusting my schedule constantly, and working my butt off to pay for classes. And if he didn't do TKD, I want him to do something else, but what? DH agreed that it shouldn't be a team sport, and that he should do something that will make him focus on what he's doing.

I also pointed out that if we pull Drew permanently (or, I like to think optimistically, for a long break, as I really hopes he can get back into it eventually), where does that leave me? I still like it, even though I don't have the energy or motivation as of late. Once I started with my new job, my schedule and energy levels changed dramatically. I'm not as entrenched as I was before. And while it can be seen as a compliment that I am fairly self-sufficient in my martial arts studies, it was getting boring, and I wasn't getting the kind of attention that I felt I needed anymore. I had to ask for help constantly, and things that were wrong with my form were being corrected after doing them wrong for a YEAR. I know my weapons half-form is pretty ugly, but functional, if that makes sense. But that's because I didn't get a lot of help when learning it. So, I can understand Drew wanting to do something different; however, I have a certainly loyalty to the place, and I feel like I'll be losing a huge part of my social life and friends there that I've made over the almost 4 years we've been there. I've worked hard to be able to afford classes and gear and such for both Drew and I, and I feel like he's throwing it down the toilet for the both of us.

DH is convinced that Drew doesn't mean it when he says he never wants to go back. Fine, I'll let him argue it out with Drew instead of me. It's a little too gut-wrenching and emotional for me.

In the meantime, just because DH was more interested than me (although I will admit I was mildly interested), we went to the new gym nearby tonight. We have some friends who are over there and like it, and know one family that sends the kids for swimming lessons there. It's a nice facility, very up-to-date. We checked it out a little bit. We saw the gym, got the basic info about the swimming classes for kids, saw some of the gym without the full tour, and that was that. I looked at the website a little more when we got home, and I know they have TKD there as well. Not the style that I've learned, but at least there'd be a TKD option there, while still being able to use the weight equipment and such (which is usually how I've lost weight-- weight training). Of course, we don't know the pricing. And the pricing for 2-1/2 hour classes/week vs. the 1 hr/week of TKD twice a week for Drew is different-- the swim classes would be slightly higher, but not by a lot. So, it's something to think about.

This whole thing has just has me ripped to shreds. I really don't know what to do in this situation. It's too much too fast for me this time, so I think I'm going to let DH handle this. He understands why I want Drew in TKD or some other discipline of sport that can help him focus his mind and his self-control-- he agrees with all the reasons I want Drew in martial arts. But as I said, where does that leave me? Try a new place for kicks, (no pun intended), yet feel like I am betraying the place that "brought me up", and where my friends are, where I know I have emotional support if not educational support? Or do I stay, and just voice my concerns that I want a little more personal attention? Or do I just try something completely different, like join this gym and do Pilates instead? I feel a lot of stress with this. I recently went through a very emotional and stressful time dealing with a problem with my family (parents, siblings, etc.) and it tore me apart to make some painful decisions about my relationship with them. But the decisions in the situation were pretty clear cut. This time, in this situation, it's not as clear what I need to do. And it's really eating me alive.

We're still here!-- again!

2008-10-28T22:39:00.002-04:00

I know, I haven't written much in months. Drew and I are still taking TKD. I took a month off in August, and in September with the new school year, we started back up, and just had another graduation this past week. It's amazing to think it's been a year already since I earned my 1st degree black belt. If I hadn't taken some breaks this past year, I would be about halfway to my 2nd degree black belt by now, but it's not a race, as SW would say. Drew is definitely evidence of that. Due to circumstances and breaks he has taken, he's far behind some kids who started after he did-- they are earning their black belts now. He's not quite there yet-- BUT he's getting much closer now. He finally earned his brown belt this past graduation. He broke his board for permission to test (and I didn't think he would), and he held his own doing Chung Jung #2 (the hardest color belt form) as a blue belt.

And then, there was freestyle weapons. Weapons are Drew's favorite thing to do. And this cycle, he was able to do his favorite weapons, which is the Jahng Bang.

Observe:

Drew's JB moves!

Okay, so he dropped it, but a big part of the success of this routine is that he didn't freak out for all the times he dropped it, and he didn't have a meltdown afterwards because of it. And he actually has some decent moves in there for a 7 year old, if I do say so myself.

Drew is a total contradiction when it comes to TKD. He wants to be in Leadership so that he can be an assistant/junior instructor trainee, but he claims he doesn't want his black belt (and yet he's so close now!). He also wants to train only on weapons, as that's his favorite, and is not so cooperative about doing the forms, sparring and board breaking. He's actually very good at sparring too, but it's not his favorite. Well, it doesn't work like that. You have to do it all, after all. Oh well. I just get him to plug along, and if we can have a day where he doesn't fight or argue too much, we're happy. The other day he was pissed at another kid for not holding the pad firmly still for a drill. So rather than freak out, he actually just went to the side of the mats, and sat down and sulked. He didn't cry or anything. He kind of put himself in a time-out. Hey, that was fine. It was better that he did that, and started back when he was willing to cooperate than have a total meltdown/freakout that disrupts the class. We'll take what we can get, after all!

My own studies are going slowly. I finally have the first half of the BME form down now. It's far from perfect, but it's acceptable. I know the second half is mostly the same thing but doing it with the left hand. That's going to be quite the challenge, as I've rarely done anything left-handed with the BME. So that will be interesting, but at least it will be easier now that I understand the first half. In looking at the 1BD curriculum, it's okay. I always do the same form, and each cycle, I make a change with weapons, spar, and I don't have to board break again until I'm ready to get to my 2BR level, and then again at 2BD level.

So, we're plugging along, and there's not really that much to report. But we're still here, and still doing taekwondo! Ai-yah!

Olympic TKD from an ATA perspective (at least mine)

2008-08-19T22:41:00.002-04:00

I started TKD more than 3 years ago, so I had no reason to watch Olympic TKD the last time around. Now that I've been involved in the sport for a while, it's interesting to watch it on the Olympics, albeit online instead of on TV. (All hail the mighty internet!)

I've been watching the women's 49kg competitions for almost 2 hours now, and I'm still trying to get the hang of it. Okay, so it's 3-2 minute rounds, there's no punching involved, and it's all about the kicking. But I see more "dancing" than kicking. The refs actually have to tell these people to "fight" rather than keep dancing around each other. And I don't see combo kicks or jump kicks. What's with that?

So, I sent an email to the online commentary guy, and he said that punching is allowed, but harder to do. No punches to the face, naturally. And no kicks to the back of the head. (AWWWW!) But definitely lots of kicking. I also notice that they keep their hands down instead of a ready to spar stance like we are taught.

It's certainly interesting to watch and try to understand. The online guy is also explaining the scoring, which has to do with how many corner judges agree in one second if a point is made, and they actually have to see AND hear contact. THe mens' competition started, and now I'm starting to see some action. Some decent combination and jump kicks. Why is it that women are so wimpy in this kind of sport sometimes? I do know women who can be as aggressive as the guys, so why am I not seeing them here at the Olympics? Oh well.

To watch, go to http://www.nbcolympics.com/taekwondo/index.html, and check to see if there's live video. There are matches starting at 9 PM EDT, and they started today. Hey, if you can't watch it on TV, at least it's online!

Olympic Motivation

2008-08-16T23:00:00.002-04:00

There's something about an exciting sporting event of any kind that motivates people to get up and move. The Olympics are no exception.

I have been sidelined for a few weeks due to my hip injury, and well, general malaise about TKD lately. I was somewhat grateful for the injury, because it allowed me to take a break and step back for a bit.

I just had my 40th birthday two days ago. As much as I would've liked a lot of hoopla for it, it was a pretty toned down day. I had the opportunity to meet up with my TKD buddy, Sandy, to indulge in some ice cream and some craft shopping (our other commonality) the afternoon of my birthday. Sandy's been out with a much bigger injury, and it's such that it looks like it's probably going to permanently sideline her from continuing TKD at this point. But she pointed something out for herself, and I find it true for me too, which is that sometimes I don't like the physical activity, but I definitely miss the social scene of it all. I think for the past couple of months, that's been true, although I was even feeling a little burnout from that too.

I think that's starting to change. While I certainly miss the personalities at my do-jahng, I think I'll be ready to go back in September. Why the change of heart? Well, one that is obvious is that my hip doesn't hurt as much now, so that helps a lot. But I think that watching Olympic swimmer Dara Torres did it for me. As she has for a lot of "older" women, she inspired me to at least keep trying. Granted she's a professional athlete, who even in retirement was more in shape than any of us regular folk. But she's 41, asthmatic, had a baby 2 years ago, and she just won her first individual medal-- a silver, no less-- in her whole career. She didn't win her first individual medal as far back when she was in her "prime"-- she won it NOW. I mean, that's incredible!

Then there's me...just turned 40, asthmatic, with a bad knee and overweight. While I don't think I'll ever be remotely close to anything of Olympic caliber in my lifetime, it doesn't mean that I can try to do my personal best. When watching Dara Torres, or Olympic god Michael Phelps, they weren't out there to just win. They concentrated more on beating their own personal times. And if they won in the process? Then that's peachy. That's what I have to do. I have to get into that mentality. The only person I have to keep up with or compete against is myself.

So starting in September, I will do my best to go in with a renewed spirit. I will relearn my form, relearn and finish learning the first half of my weapons form, and I will get the flexibility and speed of my high kicks back for sparring. If I feel ready in November or December, then I will compete, and just try to place in my new age grouping. If not, I need to just keep challenging myself, and not try to keep up with anyone else.

I really hope that someone posts the TKD matches from the Olympics online. So far, I don't see that there will be any broadcasts on TV (cable or otherwise), so I really hope that something will be online instead. I've been in this sport for 3 years, so I wasn't into watching it during the last Olympics. I'd like to watch at least one sport I actually understand and have played other than volleyball.

Definitely sidetracked again.

2008-07-25T20:50:00.002-04:00

Oh bleeh.

I finally went to the chiropractor, because I felt like those Active Release Techniques would possibly help my hip. Well, it did, but it's just starting to help. I had to go to two sessions this week alone. The chiro I saw (I go to a pair of chiros, who actually specialize in sports chiropractics and use PT as well in their treatments) checked it, and the spot where it hurt actually hurt to the touch as well as from the inside. Yikes. As the chiro was touching the site, I would actually yelp in pain, which he's rarely seen me do like that. He told me there was definitely some sort of knot going on in there, and said that they will try some treatments to help loosen this knot up again, and if their conservative methods didn't work, then he agreed that I should see the regular MD about it. So, after a pretty thorough adjustment, he applied some extra heat therapy with the vibration things (he normally puts those on my back or shoulders, but this time it was on my hip), and then later worked some ultrasound on it to help loosen it up. I was then advised to get some moist heat on it, and continue that to see if it helped. So, I've got my first heating pad now that's stuffed in my shorts as I write this. I went for more ultrasound, and he said it seemed to be getting better from the feedback he was getting on the device, and it does feel a little better as well. When I asked if I could go to TKD yet, he advised not to go for a while, so as not to undo what we are finally fixing after a few months. Fair enough. The timing is right, as I'm finishing up this month, and between vacation and not being able to attend classes due to this long standing injury, I'm taking August off. It might be for the better. I'll have several more weeks to work on my weapons form when I get back, especially in light of my frustration with learning the form.

Sometimes, you get an injury for a reason-- it might not only be because you weren't careful when exercising or have an accident. It also be a chance for you to take another break, like a mental one, so that when you start back, you will be ready with both your body AND soul.

Possibly Sidetracked again

2008-07-24T21:14:00.002-04:00

I haven't usually let an injury get in the way of my training. Well, at least not too much. Oh yeah, I will say, "Sorry, I'm not doing that and modifying that because I'm afraid of injuring my knee/back too much again," or something because my asthma makes me slow down. But I try to keep moving, and as far as doing actual kicking and punching, I'm fine. It's when you start sticking in the cardio, or excessive jumping that I start to have problem.

So I've had some sort of injury since January. I think it initially started after we had a class (and I remember, it was January because I was still taking day classes, which I miss), and we were working on some sidekick stretches/exercises. Everyone's hips were hurting something awful, including my own. I just figured that in time, like any other muscle pull, it'd go away eventually.

Fast forward to now. During the past months, it's been okay, I still feel some soreness in my hip, but it's usually when I've been sitting for too long and then get up, it creaks and hurts for a little, but once I get moving, it's usually just a mild annoyance. But this past week, it's been tough. I can still walk, but the hip hurts enough to really bother me, and no amount of moving around will help. I've taken it easy, skipped classes so far this week, and even went to the chiropractors who specializes in Active Release Techniques (that helped with my bad back injury a year and a half ago) to get some help. Dr. B said there was definitely some sort of knot there, but I know it's bad because now it's something whereby if you touch that part of my hip, I'm starting to writhe in pain. Not good. So, some work was done with ultrasound and heat and adjustments to see if that helped. I go back tomorrow for some more of that. I also bought my first heating pad based on the recommendation of the chiro. (Hey, we get enough injuries around here that I figured it was about time I got one.) The decision was made by the chiros and I that if their methods didn't work, then I'd go see the MD. I'm just slightly afraid of what might be going on. It could be something as simple as some sort of muscle tear that just hasn't healed quickly or properly, and it's agitated now. But it could be something else.

Geez. As much as I've been frustrated with getting my BME form down, and even though I haven't otherwise been too inspired to go to class otherwise, I'd hate to think that this may sidetrack me again, since I took some time off for a little bit. I would like to at least get through August before I take another break, so I can at least get my mid-term in, y'know? It's a good thing I'm not competing, because THIS would not be good.

If anyone has any other ideas of what sort of thing this could be, I'm open to suggestions. It feels like a bad bruise from the inside when you touch it from the outside, if that makes any sense. There is no visible bruise on the outside, and besides, it's about 6 months old! I just hope I don't need a cortisone shot or something like that. I can deal with needles, but they are just not fun nonetheless.

It's been a month already? Gee....

2008-07-18T21:00:00.003-04:00

I hadn't realized that it'd been a month since I last posted here. Well, then again, it doesn't seem like there's much to write about. About a week or so after the last graduation, Drew did "boot camp" in which they cram the whole summer's curriculum in a week, so that way they can take the summer off and not lose any momentum in moving up in ranks or midterms. It seemed like a good solution for Drew, and he was ready this year. It was also good daycare for a week as well! He lost so much ground not going for 6 months last year, that I didn't want him falling behind too much, especially when he's finally starting to get with the program, so to speak. He was excited to do CJ#1, I know that. I was sad that I didn't get to go to the graduation for the boot camp. SW put it at 11 AM-- what drug was she on, especially with most parents working? So JC went and took some photos and video. As usual, JC doesn't know what he's photographing or filming, so it wasn't much. But what little I could tell is that he generally has pretty good technique, and just has to have it smoothed out some more. Since they technically can't give them the belts until the actual regular summer graduation (which I didn't know), Drew was very upset and disappointed that he didn't have his blue belt. But, he should be a blue belt. He did the work, which is good. He's now halfway through his curriculum, and now that he isn't a Tiny Tiger anymore, things should move a lot faster now. Depending on how things go in the next year, he should get his 1BD this time next year or so.

For me, I'm a little behind because of taking that break a couple months back. And to be honest, I haven't had much motivation other than I paid for the services that I should actually show up for class sort of thing. (I'm still on the premium plan, unfortunately.) After finally getting past the midterm with the board breaks (no sparring--yay!) and the single SJB, I finally get to move on with the single BME. Sandy was kind enough to lend me her "fancy" BME, which is balanced very differently than the one I've been using. It feels better in my hand. If fate decides that she is to no longer take TKD, I'm thinking of offering to buy it from her. In the meantime, I've decided that there's no way that I can do the August tournament. It's only 2 weeks away, and for me, the purpose is to compete in weapons, even though you have to competed in forms and sparring too. But they are not my forte', weapons are. And I don't even have that much of the form down. I was having the same problem that I was having when I was learning the sword, namely that I was getting too many different versions, and it was confusing the hell out of me. I was actually happy that SW was there, because a)weapons is her specialty, so she knows it VERY well, and b)being the head of the school, her way is the ONLY way in the end...her version will always be the official/right way. So, she backed me up, and only got me up to a certain point even thought I learned more. My problem, as usual, is transitions. I swear as much as I was looking forward to doing this form, there's no way I could learn the whole thing in two weeks. At this point, I'll feel lucky if I learn half of it by the August graduation (which is about a month away). I'm just feeling very stupid right now that it's not coming to me more quickly. Oddly enough, SW was talking tonight about gaining better self-esteem in learning and practicing certain techniques, and sure enough, I wasn't feeling any of that. In my "regular" life, I've been gaining a lot of self-esteem in my new job, as my new boss loves me and doesn't want to lose me. After being a SAHM for 7-8 years, I'm finally back in the IT world, and found a perfect fit for me for where I left off, and I'm doing pretty well with it. So imagine going to TKD, where I've done fairly decently for a while, and between feeling exhausted physically and mentally from the new job, running around to camp, and then trying to not be bored with the rest of TKD, that the one challenge I have I can't master. Now, it's not that the moves are hard. It's still very new, but for some reason my brain isn't absorbing it as fast as I really should be learning it. It's incredibly frustrating that I found myself fighting back tears tonight being so angry at myself and feeling so stupid. I know I'll get it eventually. Once I master it, I MASTER it. I passed on sparring, a) because my knee has been hurting again, and I'm afraid to tempt fate, and b) I wanted to try to work on this section of the weapons form instead, because that needs more help than my sparring.

Just to break this up a little, I found the form on YouTube (after some searching). I'm not even a quarter of the way through this, and after watching this, man, I have a lot of work to do to make it look THIS good:

I guess the good news from tonight was that I mastered two new board breaks. The first one was a hand break-- a punch. Yes, an outright punch. The trick was to use the knuckles of your index and middle finger, and having the twist, speed and technique. SW had me do it on wood as well, just because if I missed on plastic, it would hurt like the dickens and it could still break even if it wasn't perfectly centered. Additionally, it doesn't hurt that wood is a little more pliable, one could say. (You know I'm a big advocate of wood.) The good news is that when I finally went to do it after a few painful practices, I did it, and about as close down the middle as you can get, so that was good. Unfortunately, as I mentioned, it was rather painful. With a glove, it'd be easier, for sure. I was afraid that perhaps I had done hairline fractures of my knuckles (I've had them before, but from volleyball, believe it or not, so I know the signs), and my knuckles didn't swell too much, and I could still move them quite a bit. After some icing when I got home, they are fine enough to be doing this typing! :-P So that was the first one.

After class, there was a board breaking seminar that I went to check out. JK was running it, and it was mostly kids, but there were enough adults. I was probably the second highest ranked adult there over the age of 18. ;-) The other adults were BU, who is a 2BD, and the other three were color belts. We had some good drills, and then we were encouraged to try a break from the next rank up or a variation of something you already know. Since my hand was busted up from the last class, a hand technique was out of the question. And besides, my heels and the balls of my feet can handle a lot more torture than my hands. I need my hands more than my feet, I've learned over time! LOL Anyway, it was suggested that I do a reverse hook kick, which didn't seem like it'd be too hard since it's much like a reverse side kick...with a hook at the end. So, I gave it a whirl, and fortunately, that came pretty easy-- with a plastic board, no less. So, I was pretty happy about that. I was also asked to help the little kid color belts with their breaks. I was helping one little girl we'll call BSM (hyphenated last name with the last two letters). Drew is not a fan of her older brother T, and she has a younger sister as well. I could tell that she really wasn't learning the sidekick technique that she wanted to do completely properly, so I slowed it down, and knowing that she takes dance, and was trying to get her to understand that one of her feet was in a ballet 1st position, and that's how you form the T, then I reminded her of the "table" when she chambers her kick, and then had her be more aware of her doing the break with her heel and not her toes. I think she was starting to get it more as we did it, and when she was finished practicing and did her actual break, her method was more dead on that it had been, so I was feeling a little proud about that. I was also helping coach another little boy named MO, who has this horrible habit of rushing things as well as checking for the approval from his parents, and not really thinking about what he's doing. His dad is one of those, "Do what they say, M! Yell loudly, M! etc." Kinda of like a sideline dad, but the difference is that when I do it from the sidelines with Drew, I actually know what I'm talking about, and this dad doesn't. I had to get M to focus on where his body was in relation to the board. He was doing a reverse elbow. This is not a break I do well because the back stance you need to do this break effectively is one that hurts my knees, so I can't do the break. BUT, I know where I would be making mistakes, and MO was making them worse, so I had to make him realize that he wasn't doing a side elbow, but a back elbow, and had to get him to understand that back stance, and lining up the direction of his arm with the line on the board where he had to break it. I explained it to his parents that he was looking at the board too much. He has to look at it out of the corner of his eye, or else he twists too much in the break. Once he did it the way I showed him, he broke it properly, which I was happy about as well. Maybe I do have the teaching thing in me. But to cram my material and all the color belt material in again would be hard, so perhaps teaching will continue to elude me for a while still.

So, that's about the extent of what's been going on. Classes are on hiatus for Drew until the Fall, and for me, they are not that exciting, to be honest. Yes, the BME form is proving to be challenging, and that's the only thing that's keeping it interesting, but frustrating at the same time. Oh well. Just have to keep chugging along. Send some karma that this form-- or at least the half of the form I have to know for the next graduation next month will actually be learned and retained successfully!

And for your ATA TKD pleasure, here's my favorite ATA eye candy, Taekwon Lee, in the video intro to the 2003 World Championships:

Another milestone passed

2008-06-18T20:58:00.002-04:00

Okay, so I haven't written here much lately. Well, there's not much to tell most of the time. Drew and I have been working hard on our stuff. Drew had In Wha #2, BME freestyle, and sparring to contend with, and I had to prepare for my #3 midterm, namely form, SJB form with freestyle, and board breaks.

First, let's start off with Drew, who is now a new Purple Belt:

Yes, he's very proud, and he should be. It was the first testing that he was no longer a Tiny Tiger, and had to do the full form. I know that SW is not 100% strict, especially at his age, with having it precise, but let me tell you, he had it more precise than most of the kids in his group, and many of them were several ranks above him! He goofed up but would quickly correct himself, and he didn't get upset once about the moments he'd goof up. But the moments that he had the form down pat-- oh, he shined. He really has beautiful technique. Even parts where he really should be using two handed techniques he was where the others weren't. I was really proud of him. He did wonderfully. Same with his freestyle. It was creative alright, but instead of just flopping around and waving the BME around, he actually had some kicks and real moves in there, even if it wasn't the "freestyle" form that the instructors were teaching. Again, he had beautiful technique. I really think all of this is finally starting to click with him. Same with sparring as well. He was making sure of doing "no contact" sparring, and at the end he just stopped because he was tired, but that's okay. What he did do was good.

As for me, this was an important midterm, as there are about 12 of them, and 3 of them count for points, and if you don't have enough points, then you don't get promoted to the next rank (as in 2BD). This was the first one that "counts". I was very happy to hear that I didn't have to spar since I was board breaking. Hooray! My form went okay. A fellow adult student, KB, mentioned that I had some really high kicks tonight. I told her that I saved them for graduation so as not to mess up my knee too much. ;-) I felt like I was almost blanking out at times while doing the form, I've done it so many times, but I didn't and there was no-- or very little-- loss of continuity, or at least I covered it up well. I was told by others that I did well with it. Tonight I also had my last time of having to do SJB for testing! Hooray! I had to do a freestyle, and in my freestyle, quite often I would not catch my SJB to do the move I wanted to do. But tonight, I did, and I heard a "Whoa, that was cool!" from the peanut gallery, and I think it was some of the adults, especially a 2nd degree or two. ;-) I pulled it off, and that's what matters. It's done! It's over! No more SJB until 2nd degree! Then, I had to break boards. I had it set up right, that I know. It was all me. I was still doing the side kick and round kick with my left foot, and front kick with my right. Now, you have up to three tries to get the job done. On my first try, I got the round kick and the front kick. On the second try, I got the side kick. That was better than when I tested for 1BD! The side kick was because I was having problems with feeling comfortable with distancing. But, in the end, I didn't get a bad score, I'm sure, and I passed, and that's what counts. I don't have another midterm for points for a while. (It's numbers 3, 6 and 11 that count towards rank, and naturally #12 is the big jump to 2BD.)

So, it was a successful night overall. The next cycle should be interesting. Drew is taking a short break, and will be going to TKD boot camp during the first week of July, and receiving a crash course of the summer's curriculum, in which we will receive his blue belt at the testing at the end of the week. At that point, he'll take the rest of the summer off from classes, and start up again in September. Being a blue belt, he'll be halfway through his curriculum towards his 1BD, so perhaps this time next year he'll be getting that. That will be exciting. Part of me wishes that he'd take a little time off again, so that we could time it so that he takes his 1 BD and I take my 2 BD at the same time, but I don't think that'll happen. Oh well. And during the summer, since I have to work and can't go to boot camp, I'll be continuing classes as usual. At least with the hot weather, everyday is T-shirt day, so that will help!

Onwards to the boot camp and that graduation...

Good medications and surviving Mr. Lee

2008-05-30T22:06:00.002-04:00

I know I haven't posted much lately, but there really hasn't been much to post, even with my return back to classes. Graduation/testing are coming up in a couple of weeks, so that push to get all your material crammed into your head and everything practiced so that you do okay is going on at the TKD school. For me, most of it's pretty boring, and won't start to get interesting again until the next cycle, when I FINALLY get to switch weapons to BME.

Drew's been doing well generally. He's paying attention in class, and behaving himself, not getting too out of control during sparring. He's doing well enough with forms that he's leaning towards bypassing his permission to do one last Tiny Tiger testing and going for a full testing instead. He's turning 7 next week, which is when you are no longer a Tiny Tiger that performs half the form along with an instructor and gets half a belt for the effort. Since his birthday was so close to graduation, SW said she could test him one last time as a TT, which was an option for Drew. But I think he likes the second half of the form, and he knows it (or at least I think he knows most of it), so I asked if he wanted to do the whole form in a group with the other higher belts instead, and he said yes. I've given him options to bail back into the TT since it's the last time he can, but he's stuck with his answer. As long as he's doing it in a group with the other boys, I think he'll be okay. He'll still be able to watch the other kids a bit, but I think he generally knows the form anyway. Hopefully he'll be helping to lead them instead.

I have only two big things that I've been working on, namely my 20 second freestyle for weapons and my board breaks. I think my form is about as good as it's going to get at the moment. Knowing my kihaps and smoothing out transitions are the only stumbling blocks in my form at the moment (like the spin hook kick is an awkward transition), so the others can take some precedence. Wednesday night was the first time that I actually set up my three breaking stations for my testing board break. I was thankful that SW was teaching that night and made sure that I got the practice in, because, as I said, while I've practiced individual breaks, I hadn't set up the stations before to know how I wanted to set them up for distance, etc. For a first time, it wasn't too bad. I think everyone must think I have legs a mile long or something, because they kept standing too far away, and I'd have to pull them in closer. The only mistake I made in setting them up the first time was angling the board for my round kick. (Oh, the combination break I'm doing is a sidekick with my left foot, a roundkick with my left foot, and a front kick with my right foot.) Once I got that, it was fine. So today, I was able to get another chance to practice and set up, and while I didn't get the sidekick on the first shot (I did on the second), I got the angle of the roundkick right this time, and the frontkick was a snap (literally and figuratively). And to think this is all on plastic boards, which I hate, of course, but that's the way midterms go, unfortunately. If I could do wood, you know I...would. ;-)

Drew delayed going to class until tonight, since we don't have Cub Scouts again until September, and said instead of Tuesday class, he wanted to go to Friday class with Mr. Lee. (I can use that instead since that's a pretty common name for a TKD teacher, if you think about it! :-P But really, that's his name.) Neither Drew nor I had seen Mr. Lee in a while, so he was impressed to see how much Drew had grown, and I'm sure he was impressed with how much better Drew behaved compared to the last time he saw him. One thing about Mr. Lee is that you either love him or hate him as an instructor. Personally, he's a sweetie and I certainly consider him a friend. Really nice guy. As an instructor, he's brutal. Drew loves going to class with him, and I generally tend to avoid his classes, because they are too aerobic for my asthma. But, I think that due to taking some better asthma meds and allergy meds as of late (OTC Zyrtec for the allergies, and the Symbicort with my Singulair for the asthma), I've been able to breathe a little more easily and having been having asthma attacks as readily as before. Anyway, both Drew and I took the class with Mr. Lee today. And I can say I survived it. I'll probably be feeling it in the morning, but I'm sure I'll be okay. I was able to keep up for pretty much the entire class. I'll admit that I didn't do sparring tonight, since I didn't want to overdue it, and by the time I finished my boardbreaking, there wasn't a lot of time for me to gear up, it was just as well. I had done a lot more aerobic work tonight than I usually do, and kept up, so I was happy enough.

I also made a change in my 20 second freestyle. There's a transition that I was making to get the SJB from my left hand to my right that I didn't like, and I changed it to something going around my neck instead. Much easier, and looks more razzle dazzle. And you know I'm all about the razzle dazzle. I can't wait to be done with this damn thing! And since Sandy has lent me her nicer BME for a while, it'll be nice to work with a better balanced weapon when I get to it next cycle. I need to learn the whole form by August. I'm sure it can be done, but I technically don't have to learn the whole form just yet. I'd only have to learn it for competition purposes. So I have to think about that. If I learn it all now, then I'm going to be bored again. At least I think I will be bored again. Then again, BME is a much nicer weapons that I like, so perhaps it won't. I guess I'll have to see.

I've taken my two classes this week, but Drew hasn't, so he's going to forms class in the morning. I'm actually feeling okay enough with my board breaks in the last two days that I don't feel like I need to take boardbreaking class tomorrow. I think getting in a few more practices next week will be fine. As long as I break the boards within three tries, I'm fine, and both of the practices I've done, I've done it in two, so that's not bad. I'm not over-confident, mind you. But at the same time, I've practiced the individual breaks enough times over the years that they are second nature, and by just focusing, I can usually get the job done within those three tries. And seeing that on the first attempt to set up the boards I was doing fine, I'm feeling okay about it. I just have to take my time, that's all.

So, that's the update for now. We're both sailing along for the most part, and just trying to make our way to the next graduation. After that, I'll be continuing classes through the summer, while Drew will do Boot Camp the week after graduation, and then take the rest of the summer off until school starts again. We just have to push ourselves in the next couple of weeks to make it through!

Plugging away and ice cream

2008-05-20T20:14:00.002-04:00

Not much to say for today. I went to Drew's class as he asked me to, and I didn't mind doing color belt stuff, because it keeps that stuff fresh if I should even go for my next collar, as well as it's just good for a workout. Somehow the Tuesday classes, which used to be small, have ended up being huge. There were about 20+ people in there, 3 of us being adults. We're a little more adaptable. The kids all seemed out of sorts tonight in general, and just couldn't get with the program. Some were attentive, but most weren't, and most just seemed unfocused. NK was a little pissed about it, understandably, so she took sparring away (Yay! I mean, AWWWWW...) I will say that Drew general stayed focused. You had to snap him into place a few times, but not much. There were actually kids who were worse behaved than him! There was one boy whom NK actually had him sit on the side until he could behave. And it wasn't Drew!!!! He was proud of that when I pointed that out. We did split the class in half, and Drew went with JZ while I stayed with NK. I had to choice to work on my own stuff, but I was fine doing the color belt stuff. I also helped with board breaking rather than do it myself. The one little boy who has transferred in from Pennington wanted to do an elbow break, but he was doing it completely backwards. I had to show him the basics, and eventually, he got it. Oy. Makes you wonder what they were teaching over there with certain instructors. :-S So many from there have transferred to Princeton it isn't even funny. Anyway, after class, I asked Drew how he behaved when he went to JZ's side, and he said he was very well behaved. I asked him if I could verify that with JZ, and sure enough, she did. She said his focus was really good today, and she high-fived him. I'm glad. As I've said before, it's only taken 3 years to get him to this point! But he felt good, too, that he was one of the better behaved kids in class, and considering he's the youngest boy there and behaved better than some of the older boys, he was proud of himself, which he should be. He's starting to make that connection in focusing in class and good behavior result in confidence and a job well done. Yay. To reward him for his good behavior, in which he told his dad on the phone that "you would be impressed, Dad" (LOL), I took him for some ice cream at a Carvel that just reopened as a treat. He was very happy to earn a Crazy Cotton Candy ice cream cone. (Yes, that is a flavor evidentally.)

In the meantime, I was just reading an article in Yahoo that says that in a few years, a musical about Bruce Lee is going to be produced for Broadway. At first I thought that was one of the most ridiculous things I had ever read. I think it's because my first thought would be the traditional musical comedy genre. But after reading the description, it could be pulled off, if done more like a musical drama, more in line with "Les Miserables" (not comedic at all, having seen it at least 2 or 3 times) or a later Andrew Lloyd Webber production or something like that. I guess we'll have to wait and see what happens, whether it's actually decent or a farce. It's certainly something to think about. How would YOU translate the Bruce Lee story into a Broadway musical?

Smash the Pumpkin

2008-05-17T12:36:00.002-04:00

It seems to be a reoccurring thing that Drew wants me in class at the same time as him. He used to have fits if I tried to be in class with him to keep him under control, and finally I gave up, and let the teachers try to do their job. It's always been hard to not say something from the sidelines, but I would be nipped in the bud too many times, and I'd just get frustrated, because as his mom, I do know what works and how to get him to comply more often than not.

This whole year has been a growing year for Drew. This time last year, he not even taking classes, because he had such behavior problems. It was a nightmarish time. Being in TKD Fun Camp helped, because SW set a precedence with some personal attention that made him understand that his behavior wasn't going to be tolerated, and she'd be giving him timeouts (with my permission) often at first, but less as time went along. All year, both in school and at home, he's slowly but surely been coming around. Being that he has ADHD and all, it's still a problem to keep him focused all the time, but he's come a LONG way from a year ago. Some of it might even just be maturity as well, but it's been a better year as we all persevered.

Today was a good example of that. Drew actually likes having me in class. Not that we weren't bonded before, but now we're much closer than before, and it's finally clicked that having a mom with a 1st degree black belt is very cool, and that she's an instructor trainee/in leadership helps in that he can get individual attention as well. I can say to him, "Drew, pay attention," more often to keep him focused than the instructor can during class. He likes working with me as a partner, and I can make sure that things he's been doing wrong and overlooked get corrected.

He's been making good progress in In Wha #2. I know for me, I like it MUCH better than In Wha #1, and it appears he's starting to agree with that as well. Since I was in class, and RA was teaching, we worked on a few of the hand movements that were the "tricky" parts to the latest section. But since I was in class, RA made sure to single me out, and make me do 1st degree stuff, rather than just go get a workout doing color belt stuff. That's fine, I didn't mind. I just didn't feel he HAD to feel obligated to do that. Whatever. Anyway, since we were by the mirrors, there were a few times that I had to remind Drew to pay attention, and he would listen and do so until he was distracted again. But for the most part, he stayed focused. After doing a few drills with the arm parts that were the "tricky parts", I was sent off to work on my form with JK along with a 1BR, which was fine. I didn't need as much attention, and I did do my form a few times. JK gave me a few recommendations on some things that needed smoothing out, but he said that otherwise it was looking good. I pretty much know the worst parts of what I do, which is mostly the jump kicks and the two spin hook kicks. A lot of that has to do with my bad knee.

But anyway, I was separated from Drew, and I didn't hear him being yelled at to focus or anything. The section of IW#2 that they were doing was the "Show the cookie, take the cookie away, smash the pumpkin" part of the form. Drew really took to that section, as he learned it this past week, and he's really getting that section down. Then again, he's getting all the sections down.

Before you knew it, class had ended (it's only a half hour class), and I can from the other floor and we bowed out of class. I asked how he did, and he said he behaved himself very well. LS, who was at the front desk, said he really behaved himself well today, and even RA said that he was doing really well today. RA said he was getting tired by the end of class, but he was doing great. Drew even returned RA's high five when offered, which is not something he used to do in the past.

I think it's not only that Drew is finally behaving in class, which has been 3 years in coming (yes, we started with this whole TKD thing 3 years ago already), but I think the whole TKD thing is starting to click for him. He's starting to actually pay attention and learn the forms and the new moves. He's actually starting to see that with each graduation, he gets to a new goal of getting to the next level of learning. He's starting to feel personal success not only in being recognized in behaving better in class, but also in learning the information and acting like a much better example of the black belt attitude. And that's what makes me happy. He's finally starting to like TKD. I don't believe in pushing children, but sometimes they do need to be strongly nudged. I did give Drew some breaks from TKD. He's even getting one for most of the summer. He'll have the intensive "boot camp" at the end of June, but then he won't be taking regular classes for the summer (hence why he's going to boot camp). He'll get a full belt in one week, which is cool. When he returns in September, he'll be at the halfway mark in his color belt curriculum. So, depending on how ready he is, perhaps this time next year, or at the summer of next year, he'll be ready to test for his black belt.

Yeah, having Drew's favorite part, "smash the pumpkin", and understanding it, and knowing the form and where that goes, is priceless.

Exhausted

2008-05-14T23:06:00.003-04:00

You know I tend to be a glutton for punishment. I'm fortunate that I have an instructor that will run you hard, very hard, but will never run you so ragged that you totally break down. And thank goodness for that, because in taking three classes (or most of three classes), I could barely stand up and had to be careful driving home I was so tired!

At first, I took class with Drew. He's doing better, and I found that when I take class, generally he behaves better. So I asked him if he wanted me in class, and he said yes, so I asked SW if I could take class with him, and she said sure. There was one other black belt kid in the class (he was at the same level as me, but now he's one cycle ahead of me) and otherwise, all color belts. Well, the first drills were all about running drills, and SW told me I didn't have to run. She knows it's hard for me, with the weight and asthma, as well as just returning and being out of shape. But, at least for the first few rounds, I did run, and could keep up with the kids for the most part. But then there was a point where I was really getting winded, and she said I could take a break or step out, and it was good timing. She doesn't expect me to keep up with kids who are anywhere between ages 6 and 10 in energy level, thankfully! But for the most post, the rest of it I pretty much did the same as the kids. I didn't do sparring because a) I was tired and still needed to take two more classes, and b) it was taking too much time to get Drew ready let alone get myself ready, and to spar kids, so it was just as well. I didn't break any boards either, and I think I really need to get into board breaking class if I am going to prepare for my midterm in a month. Seriously! Anyway, during the sparring, I was watching Drew during the first round, and he was up against the black belt kid, who's about the same height as he is. (I think the other kid is a few years older as well, by maybe 2 or 3 years.) The other kid popped Drew with at least two kicks in the head, which fortunately Drew just shook off. SW advised him to better protect his face, and he did, but it was a delayed reaction. I yelled, "Kick HIM in the head, Drew!" and sure enough, he got his own kick in the head to the black belt. Boy, did he feel proud! In the last round, he got a hard kick just shy of his groin (thank goodness for "fighting underwear", as we call it), and he started to cry, because it hurt understandably. But I was able to distract him in reminding him that he kicked a black belt in the head successfully, and that worked well. He was proud of himself.

The second class was really big. The big joke of the night was that a) if you owned a Y chromosome, you generally were going to be a troublemaker for the night, and b) if you had said Y chromosome and were either a 2nd or 3rd degree black belt, it was a guarantee you were going to be a troublemaker. SW often says that her worst behaved children are the high ranked adults in the school-- and she's right! (I'm one of them these days, but not as bad as some others for sure.) We did more of the same drills that were done in the Master's (Drew's) class, but also had some time to work on our own stuff. I got some good sparring in, but I didn't go into it as fully as I could since I was starting to wear out. But it was still a fun class.

Leadership was good too. She talked about the drills that we were doing, and also did some more self-defense sparring techniques, and that was interesting. You can imagine that by the end of the night, I was spent.

It's a good tired, don't get me wrong. And I'm sure that there are a few body parts that will be feeling it more tomorrow. I know my knees are feeling it tonight, but I think the new inhalent prescription I'm trying has been helping, as my wheezing wasn't as bad as usual. I know I have to work out more, and at least, I'm getting started back into that direction. I think I need to get to more classes, but I think I'll have to start that after the next graduation when our schedule changes with the end of the school year. I gotta get back on track.

First night back

2008-05-07T23:14:00.003-04:00

Well, no one had to perform CPR, so that's a good way to start! :-P

I arrived for my double classes, thinking that there might be a possibility that I wouldn't stay for both, depending how I got through the first class. Well, I made it through the first class alright. We did some drills in the beginning to warm up, and then we practiced forms. It was a large class, and I was stuck with a bunch of 10 year old boys. Oh joy. As usual, I ended up having to do things on my own, although NK made sure to check on me at least once to make sure I remember the form. I do remember it--I do it at least once a day while waiting for Drew at the bus stop, so I didn't forget. But I was tired already-- I'm not used to doing this after a long day. I practiced my SJB, as I have one more cycle with that. Well, I really need more help with that than the form. I remember it, but I still suck at it. I just want to get through this midterm so I can be DONE with it. Board breaking, which I REALLY haven't done for a long time, went okay. I did a sidekick with my left foot. Got it on the 2nd try, since I need to get back into judging my spacing in relation to the board as I approach it. We then did sparring. I did alright with that too.

So that was that for the regular class. Except for one thing.

Click on this sentence, and you'll find out what happened to me during drills.

Yes. That happened to me. Either the pants, which are all cotton, have shrunk a lot, or I've gotten heavier, or both. :-S How embarassing! Fortunately, my jacket is long enough to cover my tushie, and I was able to get a spare lightweight pair from SW. I could've gotten it for myself if she said so-- I didn't want to just grab it. But she first gave me a pair that was too small. I knew exactly what size I needed, so that's what I ended up getting. Oh well. I have two lightweight pairs now. She said she could order me a heavyweight pair, but I guess I'll have to see if that's really what I want, or at least wait until the fall for the heavyweight pair. The warm weather is coming, and I tend to get extra hot! ;-) But I survived, and just jumped right back into class as soon as I changed. I'll have to take a photo of the damage when I'm not so tired.

Instructor class was very small. It was just four of us, well, five if you count JK, who is training to get his red/black collar-- possibly even his red/black/red, I'm not sure. Anyway, he's working on bumping up officially. So it was me and a bunch of teenage boys, except for one who is a little older, maybe college age? Anyway, we worked on the one steps for S#3, which includes my favorite, "Pizza Dude". So we worked on that, and then worked on S#3, which I could do, but it's been a long while since I've done it. We also worked on the new "freestyle" BME, which isn't too bad. It's good that I learn it so I can help Drew figure some of this stuff out. While he can do whatever he wants, it would help if he knew SOME of it, at least. It went well, and a little slower paced, so that was good. After class, I asked SW if I could start learning the 1BD's BME form, even though I'm on the 3rd midterm, because I'm thinking of competing in August, and I'd rather learn and do the BME form than SJB, knowing how much I suck at SJB and would have half a chance at BME, since I like that weapon better. Heck, I'm thinking of even investing in a new BME just to have a better balanced weapon. SW also just got back from a ProTech camp (Weapons camp), and among the new "toys" she has, she has...I don't remember the exact name, but it was something like a "wind bo". If you ever watch the Avatar on Nickelodeon, it's just like his weapon-- it's collapsible, and when extended and whipped around, it makes a great whipping, windy sound. Ma'am learned about being an Air Bender! (I know, Mom Geek.) So that was cool.

So, despite the mishap, I got through. But I have to say, I AM tired. So on that note, I'm going to bed!

Back in the saddle

2008-05-03T14:32:00.002-04:00

Well, while Thursday was technically the first day of May, thus the first eligible day of going back to classes, I decided to start back today. And yes, black belt classes are early in the morning, but sorry, Saturday is usually one of the few mornings (Sunday being the other day) that I can try to sleep in a little, so I certainly try. I still needed to get back into it, so I asked Drew if he minded if I took his color belt forms class with him, and he was cool with that. He's better about that sort of thing now. I also figured that since I really haven't been working out since February, even though I've practiced my own form now and then, that starting with a lower rank class was a good way of getting warmed up again on this stuff.

I partnered up with Drew, because a)he wanted it, and b) I knew that I could keep better tabs on him and getting him to cooperate and do what he's supposed to do. We were working on #1 hook kicks, then the hook kicks followed by a round kick. It's not difficult for me, but it's part of their form, and I have hook kicks in my form too, so it worked. I discovered in the process that while I think Drew understands what's required of him, he's not executing it quite right. He swings his leg out to do the hook, rather than the proper execution, which is doing a sidekick, then bringing the "hook" in to kick the pad. The other thing was that instead of hitting the pad with his heel, he was slapping the pad with the whole bottom of his foot. Maybe this is part of his "global" apraxia that he has, whereby his motor planning is not exactly that good. I would show him on his foot where he had to hit, and yet he'd still slap the pad with his foot. Oh well. The other thing was that he wasn't holding the pad correctly. Nobody ever seems to bother to show him. And granted, he was holding for an adult,and that's harder, but he was doing things like not stabilizing his hands or arms, not holding it straight back after the kick is executed (so I'd miss the pad altogether), and holding it near his face (which is a safety hazard). JK asked if it would be helpful if he held for me, being that he's a teenager at adult size, so it'd be easier for him, and Drew got frustrated and walked away. I got my drills in, but it was okay. I had a talk with Drew later and explained that JK was only trying to help, and that it IS hard to hold for a grownup, and it just takes practice.

After the drills, we learned the new segment to IW#2, which incorporated the hook kick/roundkick combination in it. Between BP, who was leading that part of the class and myself, we were able to keep Drew on track. RA was also helping to teach the class, and just to make it more interesting for the kids, he made it into a slight contest. He wanted to see who could do it the best, and he had a tie for doing it in the first direction. The prize was that the person who "won" got to choose which instructor had to do 10 pushups. The boy who got it had JK do it, and the boy got to count the pushups out. The kids liked that. So, RA had them do it on the other side to see who could do it the best. This time around, RA decided to let the best improved person do it, and he chose Drew! Oh, Drew was very excited, but he earned it, for sure. He chose RA, and was very excited that he could do that, as well as be recognized for his good work. BP was relieved that none of the kids picked him! :-P At the end of class, Drew asked if there were any stars or awards that needed to be delivered, I think because he was hoping he'd be rewarded with something. RA decided that since all the kids did well today in class, they all got paper stars, which Drew hasn't gotten one in a long time. (If you get 10 paper stars for good behavior in class, then you get a fabric one for your uniform.) Drew was very excited. When another little boy asked if they could trade stars, just because they were different colors, Drew said sure, and did it happily. He really had a good class.

I had a good class too. My balance is a little off, as I discovered in the drills, but otherwise I've still got it. Not that I've been away THAT long. But it was a good class to go into so I could work on my teaching skills as well get back into the active swing of things, instead of just being on the sidelines. I think Drew is finally starting to make the connection and not be jealous of the fact that I have my 1BD already, and he doesn't. He's catching up, slowly, but surely. By this time next year, hopefully he'll be getting closer to his own 1st degree black belt, so that will be good. And upon hearing that, I think he's starting to feel better and like TKD better too.

When I told him he did a good job today, and I asked him why I thought he did better today and why RA thought he was the most improved, he replied, "Because I participated." That was a good observation. He really WAS participating, and that's a big part of it. He also felt that he had good manners and I reminded him that he had better FOCUS. I also reminded him that if he does all of that all the time, he's going to continue to do really well and be great in TKD. He might think he's good in TKD and knows everything, but sometimes what he does is almost right, and the instructors-- and Mom-- can help him get it ALL right, so he needs to continue to listen and learn. He seemed agreeable to that. At least for now. ;-)

So, I think I'm back to a good start. It was slow and easy, but I still felt like I had a good workout without overdoing it right off the bat. I'm a lot more out of shape than I thought I was, so it's going to be a little tough for a while, but I'm ready. And perhaps if I continue to do this with Drew and be his "mentor" in some classes, then I think he'll start to improve too.

It was cute last night, as we were waiting for Cub Scouts, we bumped into our new neighbor, Mihak, who studies Kung Fu and was going to class with his bo staff. Drew was excited to show Mihak the amount of IW#2 that he knew already, and Mihak was gracious enough to say, "Good job!" (he's a teenager himself). I think when Drew does focus and participates, as he said, he really does enjoy TKD. It's when he doesn't do those things that it's not good.

Rev'ving up for a return

2008-04-30T17:06:00.002-04:00

I discovered something today. I found that if I "google" my name, "Windsornot", a zillion hits for things that I've done come up, including several of my online blogs and postings. Geez. So much for anonymity! But interestingly enough, most of them were linked up to this blog. So if you are linked up to this and haven't said hi, please do so! I didn't know I had a "following" until I did this search. ;-)

Well, it's been two months since I took my long needed break. As mentioned, Drew's continued to go, and he's doing okay. Yesterday, I finally said something to JZ about Drew and being by the mirrors, and that it was okay to yell at him. I told her that I know she can't be disciplining him constantly because she has a whole class to focus on, but it's okay to tell him that he's not acting like a black belt, or saying that something is unacceptable behavior or something short like that, and he'll usually whip back into shape-- usually. I also suggested that when she does drills, see if she can pair him up with someone in such a way that he gets away from the mirrors. I know that we often will rearrange people in class so that people of more similar size and aptitude will be paired, so in her rearranging people, he wouldn't know that he's being singled out for being pulled away from the mirrors. When he's away from the mirrors, he tends to focus better, and not get distracted by making faces at himself and such. It was like that this past Saturday, and when she got him away from the mirrors yesterday, he did much better than usual. He still had his moments, but not as bad as usual. He actually paid attention a little more, and that's a good thing. He needs to learn to do it, because after the next graduation, no more copying the teacher at graduation! He was having some problems with his feet (somehow he contracted plantar warts on his feet--yuck-- and we finally figured out what they were to treat them, and now the skin on his feet are a little sensistive), but we worked around that as much as we could, and generally, it was a better class. Thank goodness.

In some ways, I haven't missed going to class. I like being able to not huff and puff and feel the pain in my lungs and my knees. I like having the extra time to myself. But at the same time, I'm feeling less agile than I was before, and I feel the need to get some exercise in again. I've still been practicing my form so I wouldn't forget it, so no worries there. I know I'll have to work on perfecting it again. I also have started thinking about the mid-term in June, whereby I need to practice breaking my boards, as well as getting that darn SJB routine down and get it out of the way! Bleeh! I really want to start learning the BME form that is needed for the next set of midterms. Additionally, there's a regional tournament in August locally, and I would rather do a BME form for competition than do the SJB. SJB is just not my weapon-- never has been. I'm sure if I ask, SW (or someone) will start teaching it to me so I have it by competition time. It's not like I'm raring to go back into competition, but this time, I'm not even going to expect to rate well at all (unlike last time, I thought I had at least a fighting chance with my CJ#2 form), but if I put the pressure on myself to get it perfected a little more, then there's a chance I'll push myself enough to get back into fighting shape, literally and figuratively. It's a thought, at least.

I started my payments for myself again for May, and technically, that doesn't start back until tomorrow! :-P I can't go tonight, as we've been having scheduling issues between my husband and I, but this should be the last week of such conflicts. I might start back on Saturday, perhaps taking the color belt class just to get warmed up again. And then next week, it's back in the saddle again.

Yikes.

Drew and In Wha #2

2008-04-26T16:13:00.003-04:00

Today, we had a good day in TKD class. I know I don't write often, but when we have a successful day in class, then it's worth talking about.

Being that it's Saturday, I take Drew only to the forms specialty class. Yes, he should go to some of the others, but it's tiring, and he's not always the most cooperative, so if he's going to take any, it's going to be forms class, as that's what's most important at this stage of the game.

So today, they did several drills. I wasn't watching most of the time, but he generally behaved himself. I think part of it is that he wasn't by the mirrors to distract him so he could make faces at himself. He didn't listen to directions only insofar as when BP told him to put the pad down on the floor, he continued to toss it up and play with it. When BP removed it from his hands and put it where it was supposed to go, he kicked it away. Drew's partner, a very sweet little boy whose mother was signing him up for Leadership today (and this little boy will be great for it) went to get it and put it back. Drew kicked it again. I scolded him from the sidelines for that. He needs to listen! He does a lot of that sort of thing these days, whereby he hears you, but he won't listen, or at least obey what you tell him. It's getting rather annoying to yell at him constantly for that.

Anyway, after doing drills and some additional warmups, they did the first segment of In Wha #2, the new form of the cycle. After bowing in, etc. you turn to the side into a front stance, do an X-block, pull your hands back to load for a twin upset punch, do a jump-front kick, land, upset elbow, and reverse punch. Simple enough when you learn it. It's a little more challenging after the last cycle, but it's all good. Well, Drew took to it like water. He loves this form so far! He likes doing the jump kick especially. I also noticed, that again, when he's not by the mirrors, he actually pays attention, and so when BP was asking, "Okay, what step comes next?", Drew would actually answer up and answer up correctly. He was actually paying attention, and he was picking it up CORRECTLY. Last cycle, I really resented that I was fixing mistakes that he shouldn't have been making. I think I will be telling JZ in class on Tuesday to a) stop ignoring him altogether when he acts up, but rather whisper sternly that his behavior is unacceptable, and just to work with her as best as he can, and b) have her move him away from the mirrors during class. I know often he races to be by the mirrors so he can be one of the attendance card collectors, but after bowing in, she should move people around and make sure he's not near the mirrors so he can't goof off. It's a waste of her time and my time and money if he's not paying attention.

But Drew had a good day today. He was even practicing the form at least once on one side after class, he liked it so much. Let's hope it continues to go well like this for this cycle...

He's movin' on up!

2008-04-16T00:05:00.004-04:00

I know, I know, this blog has seemingly died since I stopped classes for a bit. Life has been just too crazy, but I'm hoping that I might be able to start classes again in May. But I'm glad I've taken the break. I needed it. And after having a visit with Sandy the other day, who started back this past cycle at her school (where things are really changing a lot),and so much of what we talked about was TKD. Of course, she was teasing me that she's a cycle ahead of me now, and naturally, I reminded her that if I hadn't taken the cycle off, I'd be tied with her, thank you very much. ANd when I told SW that conversation, she teased that Sandy and I are worse than some of the kids. I retorted, "But she started it!" and SW replied, "See? There's my proof." :-P

Anyway, Drew has still been going to class, and tonight was graduation night. Before the graduation, there were a bunch of kids, some of them older and higher ranked than Drew, who were running around on the mats and goofing off. There was one boy in particular, I think his name is HL, who is a real troublemaker and he's a half-orange, half-white (which means he's just bumped up his first rank). I've seen him in his class while Drew takes his class on the opposite mat, and this HL kid seems to be trouble. Several times, I actually got up and yelled at these kids, especially this HL kid. When he got in Drew's face and tried to attack Drew, and I could tell that Drew wanted to retaliate REALLY badly, I got up and told the kid off, then instructed Drew that if HL acted up again to tell SW or one of the other instructors, because they would discipline him and tell his mom. Sure enough, when NK started to yell at the kids herself, Drew was sure to tell her about HL's antics. Not in a tattletale way, but rather factually. She appreciated him telling her, and she told me later that she was glad that he said something to her rather than get in trouble himself. That was a big step forward for him.

So, graduation started, and he was one of the first to go up with little JS. JS is a little girl (and I mean tiny!) who just turned 5, and whom Drew has deemed as "very cute". Even JS's mom teased, "Hey, is your son trying to pick up my daughter?" :-P Even though JS has a big brother who is a 1st degree black belt (he's 11, but he's not much taller than Drew, and he's a nice kid who tries to help Drew during classes), I think Drew thinks of himself like a big brother to her. He's very gentle and sweet and careful around her, knowing that she's a lot smaller than him. Both of them are "Tiny Tigers" (Drew just for one more cycle, then when he turns 7, he won't be anymore), so they end up doing stuff together very often. Anyway, they had to do their forms and weapons together, and I reminded Drew not to crowd next to JS, as they had the WHOLE floor to use. Well, they were doing great, and Drew was answering up and everything, showing great discipline.

Here's Drew getting ready to do his form. (You can see JS next to him.)

Power move!

Anyway, at one point, Drew actually got a little carried away in the movement he was doing (I believe it was an inner crescent kick followed immediately with a reverse side kick), and he lost his balance and fell. I was afraid he was going to start crying or have a meltdown, but SW just assured him it was okay and to just get up and continue. And sure enough, he did. (I think the "power move" above happened right after that.) He got through, and finished nicely. He did a decent JB freestyle form (aka freestyle bo kata), where again, he dropped his JB, but he just picked it up and kept going. He got the whole back floor to himself. Hey, at least he got up and did it! At this stage, he isn't required to do weapons, but it's good practice, because when he IS required to do it, it will feel normal for him to do it.

Lastly, he did his sparring. JS and he were ready first, and Drew promised, as did JS (hee hee), that they would remember that it was graduation sparring, otherwise as no contact sparring, or for them, no touching sparring (no contact doesn't always compute in the mind of a little one, y'know). Drew and JS went at it, and for most of the time, Drew just let JS attack him. He did defend himself, but he wasn't aggressive towards her at all like he would be if it was another boy his size. I was really surprised, but pleased nonetheless. JS's parents were too. (Yes, I'm friends with the family at the school, as JS's dad also takes classes now, and we see them all the time. Nice family.) When it was all said and done, Drew had really controlled himself during the sparring, and even though he didn't show his sparring skills fully, I think that self-control was HUGE, and that in itself was noteworthy. In fact, JZ, who was judging the sparring, made a point of coming over and complimenting Drew on his actions and doing so well.

The rest of the graduation, Drew had to sit patiently and wait, watching board breakers and other people doing their forms. Normally, after a while, he'd get fussy and fidgety. Not today. He sat patiently and clapped for other people, and cheered the board breakers and everything. He behaved beautifully.

I was very proud of Drew today. We've had a lot of things going on whereby he has acted out lately, and there have been things where he hasn't, so it's hard to know when he's going to react to things. Today showed that he could be the good boy-- and have a black belt attitude-- when he puts his mind to it. I was REALLY proud of him. Super proud.

And naturally, he's proud of his new belt. He's now a half-purple, half-green belt (purple recommended). Next belt: Full purple. And his last one earned as a Tiny Tiger. After that, he will have to know full form from that point on, starting with learning stuff for his blue belt. No more half belts until red-black (aka 1BR).

Good Job!

What? There's a new post here?

2008-03-30T10:55:00.002-04:00

Hello there people!

Yes, it's been rather quiet here at the Other Journal, and for good reason. I haven't been to TKD classes in a month. Even though I can't pay for lessons other than Drew's right now, and had the offer to continue training anyway, life has been just a huge mess. It's really not fun with "real life" gets in the way, but rather than get into the messy details (and believe me, if you knew the details, you'd think it was a South American soap opera or something), I'll just leave it at saying that it's been a terrible past month or so. To summarize, we had a house guest who, while a decent house guest, overstayed his welcome. Then, the bigger problems had to do with a property my husband owns and rents out, and it continues to be a problem, but we are hoping we are starting to see the end of the tunnel with that soon. As a result, I'd have to sacrifice my training time. It's okay for the most part, because the property issues are much more important right now. And I have needed a break. But I think I need to get back into the swing of things. I have been practicing my form, but told SW that I was opting out of this cycle's testing, even though she said I could still do it. It was only this past week that I was able to tell her about the insanity going on, because we, even as friends, haven't had much of a chance to catch up lately. But anyway, this cycle was a major mid-term, and while I'm sure I could pull it off, I don't think I would so a great job, just a good one, and I'm a slight perfectionist that way. I'd rather do my best than my "okay/passable". I think I'll try back again after tax time, as the graduation/testing is on tax day. My knee needed the break, my lungs needed the break, and I, for sanity reasons, needed the break. But I miss my friends, and I think I do need more exercise again, so I need to make time in the near future.

In the meantime, Drew has been continuing. This past week has been pretty good, since we have been on spring break for regular school, so things were rather quiet in do-jahng, which was good for Drew. Not as much sound overload, and he was able to concentrate a little better. Of course, he still has problems focusing, and he loves to watch himself in the mirror a little too much and makes faces at himself, but I supposed that's part of his immaturity as well as him being 6 1/2. But he's doing so much better in class, and not having meltdowns like he used to have. Even the other day, while I was talking to SW, he was starting to have a minor meltdown because he couldn't get his chest protector off, but someone else helped him, and it was nipped in the bud quickly. He's starting to help put his gear on and off himself, which is good. He's made a lot of progress overall. He knows most of the whole form, even if he only has to know half. And, he's learning to get less frustrated when things don't happen instantly for him, like learning some new board breaks. Of course, it helps that the instructors are patient with him, and he does get it eventually. I remind him that some of this stuff take practice, and as long as he tries his best and keeps trying, he'll eventually get better.

Things have been good enough, both in the do-jahng and at home with the reduction of meltdowns that I feel like I'm starting to have a "normal" kid. And believe me, that's a HUGE relief. Yes, I still have to put things in place to make sure that life runs more smoothly for him, and do my best to diffuse the meltdowns quickly and put him in his place when needed. But when proposing the idea of TKD Boot Camp to him, Drew was actually open to the idea. A year ago, I don't think he would've lasted. But this year, I think he can do it. SW and I discussed it, and she thought it'd work out great for him. He will have just gotten his purple belt earlier that month, and she said that getting his blue at boot camp would be an excellent transition. I still have to figure out the financial logistics of it all, but I will. He may also go to TKD fun camp too, which Drew was saying, OH YEAH, I want to do that again. The good thing about doing those is that even if I can't pay for it all up front, SW knows we are good for the money, and I will give her as much as I can when I can, and that I will consistently give her something. I've always been good that way. So both TKD Boot camp AND TKD fun camp (half day of TKD and half day of fun stuff?). Can't beat that! I'm just glad Drew is going to be mature enough to do boot camp if we can swing it schedule-wise. And that he's up to it! That's progress in itself.

So, that's what's been happening here. I wish I was getting this midterm out of the way, but I didn't feel like I had practiced enough, especially since this midterm was all about board breaks. The rest of it would've been fine. But it's not a race. And I DO want to get this particular midterm out of the way, because the sooner it's out of the way, the sooner I can move onto using the BME instead of the SJB for weapons. (We know how much I love SJB--NOT!) And in looking ahead with the midterms (I have a list of the requirements right here at my desk to refer to), I also get inside and outside flow/joint locks and JB to do before testing for my second degree, and even double BME drills for the 2BD rank test, so that should be good. It's something to look forward to, at least.

Hey! Watch where you swing that thing!

2008-03-05T23:14:00.002-05:00

I haven't been feeling 100% lately. I don't know if it's stress starting to take a toll on my health just making me feel worn down, or what. But I really wasn't up to doing double classes tonight. So, I just attended Instructor class, which was pretty full tonight. I actually got to the school a litle late that I could've just joined in late, but I was just trying to escape home for a while, so I was talking with a new/transferred mom (her son just transferred to our school) and Sandy's daughter, J. I was kind of glad, as it looks like SW was really putting everyone through the ringer tonight! I did pay attention when she was doing forms with the 1BDs, as she was reviewing one section with them regarding the hand loads in the last segment of the form. Hopefully, I'll remember.

Instructor class was actually fun tonight. It's kind of nice when we don't have to work on our forms, and we learn something new that we could be teaching the kids. In this case, this cycle, SW has been teaching new "freestyle" forms in SJB and JB to the kids, and we got to learn the form. Hooray! I get to use something other than that damn SJB! ('Cause we all know how much I LUUUUUUV the SJB-- NOT!!). So tonight, we were learning the new JB/Bo staff "freestyle". Let's see if I remember it and can describe it.... It starts with a reverse figure 8 while held in both hands, then a #3 strike, then a one handed figure eight with another #3 strike, then the over the head #4 then back to #3 strikes (what Drew was practicing yesterday), then some sort of step back and turn around and strike, then a big over the head and turn with a strike, a #7 then #8, then (the part I was having major trouble with) 3 figure eights with my right hand, 2 "twirls" in front and while turning, 1 twirl behind me, and land in that #3 strike again. The home stretch was the easy part! #4 strike, #8, #7, #3, then take a step back while doing a #6, and then stab in a rear stance. I might be forgetting something, but that was the main jist.

My biggest problem was the "twirls"-- for which I can't think of a better word for what was done. It's something that has never been formally taught to me by SW, only by just about everybody else. It's basically doing a hand over hand to spin the JB either right in front of you, or behind you. I think one thing I have to remember is that the left hand is always on top-- that's a good start. I think I just really have to practice this one. It's not required of me right now, but it will be in time. Strike lines and some easy passes I can do. But these "twirls" are just near impossible for me. It shouldn't be this hard! But as I told SW that I was fairly confuzzled about it all, she said, "Trust me, it really isn't as easy as it looks." Then again, I need to do things and be shown things in super slow motion more times than most. But once I get it and it clicks, OH, it clicks! I was just thankful that I was picking up most of it, and that I was paired with some of the more experienced people to help me through it.

I have to admit, if I wasn't feeling so bleeh lately, and my knee cooperated more, I'd enjoy TKD a lot more, and I could see myself taking class more often. I dunno. I don't know what's wrong with me, that part of me doesn't want to go, and part of me does want to go. Part of me wants to be able to go out there, and help teach. Part of me is happy to be on the sidelines. It's hard to explain.

I was just glad to have a change of pace for class, and actually learning something new, especially with a weapon that I like, was good. I need a change up now and then.

We really need to remember the earplugs

2008-03-04T19:40:00.003-05:00

Tonight was Drew's turn. He really tried to be a trooper early in the game. The kids are still yelling too loud at times, and he did stand up for himself. EL, who was helping out in class, even told the kids that it's okay to be enthusiastic when answering up, but they didn't have to yell. Well, she tried, and I thanked her for it. It got to be too much that Drew had to sit out for a little bit, as he was grabbing his ear and saying he was getting a headache behind his ear when it got to be too much. There's one kid in particular, T, whom you see in his eyes that he knows that his overly loud answering bothers Drew, and he has this evil gleam in his eyes looking over at Drew when he does it. He always positions himself next to Drew, just to irk him. Even tonight, Drew said he was going to ignore the kids when they yelled too much, but he just couldn't. I tell you, sensory integration disorder really sucks. But he tried, and I really, REALLY need to remember to bring his earplugs with him to muffle the sound so he can handle it. I know that one of the other student assistants, LS, tried again to work with him, which I appreciate a lot. He seems to respond to her, which is good.

I was talking to one of the dads tonight, and I figured out that as far as I can tell, Drew is the next to youngest in the class, even if he's not the lowest ranked (he's definitely one of the lower ones, though). His daughter is the youngest at age 4, and she's the same rank as Drew (she came up through another school then transferred). Part of the problem is that Drew is only 6 years old. (Okay, he'd correct me and say 6 1/2.) However, he's as big as the 8 and 9 year olds, so very often, people don't understand why he acts immature and such. Well, let's see, most ADHD and children with speech deficiencies tend to be more immature anyway. And well, he IS younger than everyone else there (with the exception of the four year old)! What do you expect! It seems like only those parents who have been with him the whole time, and the staff really understand how far he's come over the years. I mean, he started almost 3 years ago come this spring. Oh yes, he's come a long way, but like I said, most people don't realize it, and don't know what he's had to do to get to where he is now. He's never been in the SA classes-- he's always been put in the mainstream classes. For a child who started this venture at 3 1/2 and had JUST started to learn how to talk at that point, plus the sensory and ADHD stuff (although we didn't know of the latter of those two until last year), that HAD to be difficult. But he's persevered. And it's still hard for him to get through class sometimes, yet he does.

Anyway, let me get off my soapbox for a moment.

Okay, as I was saying...

Drew really loves JB. They were working on the move where you switch sides and duck back a little so as to get a high hit, but not hit your own face. He got the hang of it last week when they showed it, so he was goofing off a little, but he could do it while some other kids still struggled with it. And sparring, well, again, he was paired up with another kid who decided that it was time free-for-all time. Well, it wasn't just him that was like that, several kids were like that, but he's a higher belt as well as older. So, I saw that the next round, Drew sparred with the assistant who was trying to help him earlier, LS. She got him good, but he was having fun with it as she'd kick him in the head a few times, and he'd rally back. As he was getting his gear off, I think he finds that he likes sparring the instructors, or at least much older kids who are bigger than him, because he gets that balance of him being able to go all out a little, plus they present him with a challenge, and I think he likes that.

I think the thing I'm discovering in the last few weeks, however, is that SW doesn't teach at any point in that class at all. Not that she has to do that. She'll teach the W-O-Y class at the same time, and hypes that up, especially for those new parents who are watching. And for business purposes, I can understand that. She is the draw there, so she needs to perform and show these people early on that this is what's expected, and that she's good at what she does, so when they bump up they are prepared. But part of me just wishes that she'd see what's going on at this color belt class that Drew is in. I know she can't pay particular attention to him, but when she's there, he pays better attention, and she'll dole out justice much more quickly than these teenage girls who are instructors, no matter how good they are. If I had the time and money for private lessons, I'd do it. Yet at the same time, he needs the social interaction that happens with class. Even though TKD is supposed to teach the kids courtesy and respect for others, there are still bullies in his class. He could easily be a bully himself, but I really try to work hard to make sure that he's not, yet will stand up for himself. I just wish that SW wasn't talking it up with the bullies' parents because they put multiple kids in her school. It irks me. I know Drew is not an easy child to deal with, but if courtesy and respect really isn't practiced unless she is in the kids' faces, then what's the point? There are times I want to help out in that class, so I can lecture the kids in a generic way, and show them that "evil Ma'am"'s got NOTHING on Mrs. V (that's me). As I mentioned, I run my Cub Scout den like a TKD class, and the kids are much more respectful in there than they are where it really should be happening. I don't say anything to SW because, well, I really don't think she's going to do anything about it, and probably would think I'm whining or something.

Sorry, back on the soapbox. Can you tell this really bothers me, week after week?

I'm probably only going to take one class tomorrow, as my BIL is coming in very late tonight to visit for 3 weeks, and tomorrow will be our first night together, so rather than take two classes, just one will be fine. Maybe I'll just go on Saturday or something. I dunno. I'm not unhappy with my school. I guess it's just that I'm not always happy with how things are handled, and it's only because of staffing shortages, and because I am mentally worn out by the place sometimes. It's still very much like another home to me, as I like to talk to other parents and students and such. But sometimes, oh, it's just a little too dysfunctional for my taste. It's not as bad as other places, I remind myself. And we're not transferring. I just don't feel like my family -- either Drew or I-- get the attention we need to do better. Even me. I'm just left on my own more often than not, so it's discouraging, especially when I'm bored. I know I need help with some elements of my form, and I'm just not going to be getting it. Bleeh.

Earplugs. Gotta remember the earplugs.

Gumdo isn't a soup, and other tricks too.

2008-03-01T21:31:00.003-05:00

I unexpectedly attended a seminar at the ATA last night that my friend Sandy had somewhat talked me into going to. See, normally on a Friday night, I'm off playing Den Leader for Drew's Tiger Cub Scout group. But, I cancelled out meeting, and I had a free night. I had thought about going to the Haidong Gumdo seminar, which I had taken last year, but when Sandy asked if she could borrow my sword, I said she could use it, and I'd just have a free night. Then, here we are, emailing each other at midnight, and she convinces me to go, as she can also borrow a sword from SW. Fine, I'll go!

I get there an hour early-- by accident. I thought that the seminar started at 6:30 PM, but it started at 7:30 PM. I could've taken the 6:30 class, but man, it was packed, and well, I just wasn't up to it. Instead, I chatted with some moms and caught up with them. I had planned on doing some knitting, since I had it with me instead. I think the social time was more helpful to me and my mental state than doing the class or knitting.

Class started, and both the instructors who taught it last year taught it to us. It was all basics, and that's fine. I'm glad I had done the seminar last year and done a cycle of sword a year ago, as it helped me understand it much better this year. It was a more simplified seminar than last year, since a)it was mostly younger kids, and b)it was only an hour this time instead of a two and a half hour seminar. (If it wasn't 2 1/2 hrs last year, it was at least two hours.) AS irked me, as he was like, "Oh, I know this stuff," but he'd goof off and not focus, and wield his wooden sword, and wouldn't watch was he was doing, and not pay attention at all. Pretty bad for a 15 year old! Some of the stretches were a little easier, and in a conversation after the seminar, one of the instructors and I were discussing knee issues, and she said that this form was easier on the knees than regular TKD. (She is a 1st degree in Songham TKD, being, as SW would say, a non-training student of hers.) It's something to think about. It's also very intensive on the upper body. Although it's never been formally diagnosed, based on my son, I think I have a very mild case of upper body hypotonia, which is that I have denser muscles and they tire out more easily, so it's harder for me to build upper body strength. But it's something to think about for the future if my knee really gets bad enough. So it was a good night, and I caught up on all sorts of ATA gossip and news and hanging out a little with Sandy.

Today was a good class day for Drew overall. In forms class, he had the wiggles as usual, and I actually sat and knit, trying not to pay attention. From what I could tell from the few times I glanced up, he was doing pretty well. During drills, they were working on doing double round kicks, namely doing two round kicks without putting your foot down. The idea is that the first is high, and the second is higher. The boy he was paired up with during drills was older, and he didn't seem to always understand that the pad had to go a little higher, especially if Drew was doing the second kick higher. Oh well. BP, who was teaching the class noticed, and I heard him compliment Drew for doing some great kicks. Drew really is very good when he puts his mind to it. I'll have to tell you about his sidekick demo in a moment outside the ATA, but I'll tell you that later.

In the meantime, since this cycle the kids can do either single SJB or JB, Drew chose JB (aka bo staff) for this cycle, as it's his favorite weapon. Granted, he swings it around a little too much, but he's getting better control of it. I was a little surprised that he wanted to stay for weapons class, but that was fine by me-- we didn't have any special plans for the day, and if he stays, more power to him if he wants to learn. Today, they were trying to teach the kids how to do something whereby with one hand they flip the staff around their hand and catch it. You heard a lot of plopping sounds echoing off the mats from the kids trying not to hit each other and dropping their JBs on the floor a lot. BP also made sure that they learned to do it with both hands. With some practice, Drew was actually getting the hang of it, and was very excited to demonstrate it to me. I think as he starts to pay attention more, and not get as frustrated in practicing, he is getting better, and is starting to enjoy it. He was in a good mood when he got out of the weapons class, which is always the preferred way to have Drew after class-- happy.

The sidekick story now. Yesterday, I had to go to the chiropractor for an adjustment. The partner who saw me yesterday is also a certified sports chiropractor, and knows some extra advanced techniques to help with some sports injuries, and so I mentioned the fact that after doing some sidekick stuff about a month ago or so, my right hip joint was still bothering me, and asked if he could check it out. Now, this partner also has his own 1st degree black belt in TKD, so he understands all the lingo and jargon that I throw at him, and if I say that we were doing all these sidekick exercises, then he has a better idea of which muscle group area to target when doing his exam. Since Drew's school is quite nearby, I had picked him up from school before the appointment, and brought him along to the "back doctor", since he's quite familiar with them, and that way, I didn't have to worry about him. He's often the doctor's helper for Mom. Well, yesterday, I was explaining that it was some sidekick stuff that did this to me a while back, and Drew starts to explain in great detail how to do a sidekick, as in a sidekick break, since SW had just taught him the other day how to do it. He remembered his "T" (foot positioning), and his chamber and rechamber, and whoosh! I could even hear his kick even though I was not looking at him directly, just listening. Dr. L was very impressed and was like, "WOW! He's got really good form, doesn't he?" Proudly, I could tell him that I agreed. Drew was also proud to tell him that he was a green belt now, and Dr. L said it showed, and that in turn made Drew proud of himself.

It's taken a very long time to get Drew to this point, where he's actually starting to not mind classes, and focus better, and really start to make some significant progress. I'm glad that I didn't let him quit entirely, as it's starting to pay off. I still feel that if we can get him to focus more, not get so frustrated, and really listen and do what he's told, he can really be an outstanding martial artist. He's got some of his mother's dancing genes in him, which means that he's very fluid in his actions, and he sees how it can all come together as if it were a dance and how smooth it looks when everything is done right. He still has a long way to go towards his black belt, and once he turns 7, he won't be a Tiny Tiger anymore, and won't get help from an instructor during testing, and he'll need to learn the full form, not just the half form. That will be a big challenge for him. But I think with some patience, he'll get through it fine. By the summer, he should be getting his purple belt, which is just shy of halfway through the curriculum. If he continues through the summer, or goes to boot camp, he will be halfway through. Then, it will be at least one more year, hopefully, until he gets his black belt. Yeah, I think age 8 will be a good age to get a black belt for him. But we'll see. I'm not going to push anything, but I am definitely encouraged by not only this year, but especially more recent events for him.

Comfort Zone

2008-02-27T23:41:00.002-05:00

After last week's "endurance-a-thon", which was truly a test of one's endurance for sure, I was glad that it was "back to normal" with SW back from Spring Nationals. As I mentioned yesterday, she had showed off her mammoth medals she got for 3rd place in two events. When speaking to her before class, I asked and guessed correctly that they were in sparring and weapons respectively. She said the weapons one was especially surprising, but both were a treat as she has not been training as much lately, so considering this was on a National level, it was a big surprise, so she was happy with the results.

Class was much better tonight. We still got a workout, but it's nice when your instructor paces things that those of us over age 29 and slightly out of shape but still something that the tweens and teens can still be challenged by. The pace was MUCH better, not the run-yourself-ragged workout, but still a workout. SW concentrated more on technique tonight than anything else. There were more adults in the class, even though they are color belts, but that's okay. Both of the guys who were the color belts in class tonight are really nice, and great to work with. For that particular class, I think I was the highest ranking adult, which I guess says something (although I wasn't the highest ranked student). One thing that I was working on tonight was learning a new release move for the SJB that NK was showing the color belts tonight. It's where you start doing a figure 8, but then do the release on the way up, and then when doing the other side of the 8, then you do the other release. Well, in theory, it's easy enough to do. I understand what needs to be done, but it's easier said than done. Why am I trying to do it, when I am particularly not fond of this weapon? Simple. It's RAZZLE DAZZLE. It looks good, and I have a 20 second freestyle at the end of my weapons form. I have a basic routine worked out, including some release moves, but if I could include that one, then it would REALLY look good. I think I have something to practice at the bus stop when I wait for Drew in the afternoons after school. Since this next midterm is one that counts because I have to break boards, I'm thinking that since the upset knifehand is hard to do, and I think it'd take too much time to figure out the reverse jump side kick, I'll work on what's "safe"-- the round kick, side kick and front kick with one of them on the "opposite" foot. Well, I've been playing with the idea that since my round kick break is with my "opposite" foot anyway, I'd do the round kick with my right foot (since I usually kick with my left), and the others with my left. But now, I'm thinking of playing it extra safe, and just going with what I know-- round and side with the right foot, round kick with the left. It's only the first midterm, so it'll give me time to work on the other ones. Sparring wasn't much to speak of. It was fine, but again, I'm mostly working with color belts, so it's not as much of a challenge, other than chasing the faster ones. ;-)

Instructor class was okay. NK was practicing her new bo routine for XMA using MY bo staff. That's fine. She'll take care of it, and at the same time, at least it's getting some use right now. We did some drills where we reviewed how to use our words to describe what we wanted for a particular move, so that was a good exercise. Generally it's a good class. As tired as I was, I got through, and got a chance to work on that figure 8 release move a little more after doing my form a few times. The knee is really acting up lately, even with the knee brace on. I swear, as awful as it sounds, I wish I could just get some surgery on it, but it's not "bad enough". Eesh.

So, I think that since SW was back (and in a good mood), and she understands us 29+ people well (since she is one of us), I really felt more in the comfort zone than, say, a week ago. This isn't to say that RA is a bad teacher. I just don't always like his teaching methods. I would rather move slowly and have jaw-droppingly incredible technique than be lightening speedy. Speed comes with time, and the more I practice good technique, it WILL come.

Chivarly is not dead, I guess.

2008-02-26T21:22:00.002-05:00

You know how I said in my last post that I'd be taking a little break from TKD for financial reasons? Well, it's amazing how things can change in 3 days.

This evening, I took Drew to his usual TKD class. Now, a few days ago, I had left SW the March payment check for Drew and a note to explain why I was only paying one tuition for a while with most of the back story. I mean, none of it was SO personal, and she is my friend as well as my ex-boss, so she knew that I was trustworthy in what I said, and hadn't steered her wrong before. So, as I came in with Drew, she asked me to come into her office. She was in a good mood, fortunately, and I knew she probably wanted to talk about the note. I just figured that she'd say something like, "Thanks for telling me, no problem, just let me know when you are ready to start back." And that would've been fine. But then she threw me for a little loop there.

She just told me that she understood what was going on, and that I shouldn't worry about it, just keep coming in for training. She said if needed, we could work something out later, but she didn't want me to give up my training just because I couldn't pay right now. I asked her if she was sure, because it wasn't like I HAD to give up TKD-- I volunteered, as sometimes you just have to make some sacrifices for a while for your family, and this seemed like an easy one for me. She assured me that she understood, and in some ways, I was preaching to the choir. She knows me well enough that she can trust me, that I would never take advantage of her, so I'm sure that's why she extended the offer to train and just pay to the best of my ability when I can. I knew it was good not to burn my bridges when I left, and to behave myself until the end!

So, as much as I thought I was going to take a break (and kinda looking forward to it), I guess I'm not. But, at the same time, I think I might still cut back a little bit. My knee started acting up again today, and I don't know why, as I felt it bothering me when I was walking around the supermarket today. And I've been burned out from TKD for a while, but to lose ground on the momentum I've had in progressing through my midterms, well, maybe it's a good thing that I don't have to stop training. We'll see. Hmm...maybe being a goodie-goodie all the time has its perks after all...

In the meantime, Drew had his first class where he was really learning IW#1 (aka In Wha #1), a new form. Drew continues to have problems where things get waaaay too loud around there, and some of the kids ki-hap and answer up a little too loud because they know it bothers him. Makes me want to smack those kids, and at the same time, pissed at myself because I forgot Drew's ear plugs again. Poor kid. LS, one of the student instructors, helped pull him aside and worked with him, which I made sure to thank her for that. She said she realized what was going on, and she just tried to help Drew as best as she could, and he did respond pretty well. Drew did goof off a little in class, but when it came to weapons (he's doing jahng bang/bo staff this cycle), I think he has a natural knack for some of it. Today they were learning this one variation on a #3/#4 strike, whereby when you switch the strike from one side to the other, you have to lean back a little so as not to hit your face, and then end with the bo staff, and whereas other kids didn't get it, he actually did listen to directions, and he did it without any further coaching, and could show JZ when it was his turn to show her how he practiced it. Go Drew! Later, he didn't want to do board breaks as it was foot week, and he doesn't like foot breaks. So, SW helped him with that, and got him to figure out the side kick. It took him a few tries, but he got it, and I think because she was in a good mood (she just got back from Nationals and evidentally medalled in some categories, as the medals were being shown off at the front desk-- cool), she was able to put him in a good mood and work with him, and get him out of the grumpies to get him to work on a new break which he'll need to learn soon enough for testing, and give him some confidence he needed to try. That was good.

Drew was also excited because he was recognized officially as a green belt tonight, getting his certificate and his first stripe on the new belt, so that made him happy. He was still a little grumpy after class, but I think it was because he was tired. He told me, for the first time, that he actually is interested in getting his black belt, but sometimes he really hates TKD. I assured him that very often I don't feel like going to class, and how much I get frustrated with my board breaks and not getting my form right, and stuff like that, but you just have to keep trying and trying and the instructors are there to help you out and reach that goal if you want it. But just hearing that he had ANY interest in getting his black belt tonight was a first. I think he's starting to get it about earning a rank or title to something. He is starting to understand the pride in putting in the work and getting recognized for it. Yay! It's about time that it started clicking in with him. Even with that, I'm not going to pressure him that he has to do it by a certain time. There's no rush. I'll help him any way I can to help him get to where he wants to be, as long as it's in a positive direction. That's what moms are for, after all. ;-)

So, I guess my training starts up again tomorrow rather than winds down. I think I might still cut back a little. I already have due to my new job, but perhaps I might cut back some more, perhaps until the weather gets better and stress is less. They are both affecting my asthma something fierce, and I don't know that my body can handle that too well. I'd rather take it easy and keep moving, y'know? Only time will tell.

Just when you think you know me...

2008-02-23T22:08:00.002-05:00

HA! I am going to surprise some of you.

But first, a customary report, this time about Drew. Drew hadn't been in class this week due to illness, so he went today. I think a lot of people, due to the long weekend last week, came to make up classes this week, as it was rather crowded. There were even a lot of adults in the color belt forms class of Drew's today, which is quite unusual. Drew didn't want to cooperate. He kept saying he was tired. I think he might have been a little bit, because before class we were actually making him help clean up the family room (horrors!), and all the cardio they did at the beginning of class could've easily tired him out. Between recovering from his illness, my suspicion that he indeed has asthma like his mom (but his father insists on denying it), and that he might genuinely be tired, he wasn't very cooperative. He may have been a little bored too with the moves they were practicing today. I don't know. But at least he didn't have any major blowouts or tantrums or cause too much of a disruption in class. I could tell all the instructors were trying to get him to cooperate, but not pushing any buttons at the same time, which was good. Oh well. I did show Drew the whole first segment of the form so he could see it, since it was new to him, and I think he might like it. He agreed that he'd like to see the form on the DVD we have so that he might better understand it, and that's fine.

While I was waiting, I was also handed something that I earned a while ago. Behold my latest achievement with the ATA:

Level 1 - Corner Judge

Now it's official. I really am a Corner Judge now, which is pretty cool. This means that I can judge hands or feet in a color belt ring, but not be the center judge. It's a start! I have to see if I can either figure out myself, or have either Sandy (the expert seamstress/quilter extraordinaire) or my MIL fix my sleeves on my uniform so that a) they are hemmed and don't get in the way, since I roll them up currently, and b)once that's done, they can put this patch on my right sleeve where it belongs. Heck, I earned it, so I want to wear it!

And now, for the possibly surprising news. I am actually stopping TKD for a while. It mostly has to do with financial reasons, as money is tight right now. Tuition at our school is steep, especially the first three years of membership, and it's money that we can use towards other things. I won't get into the details, as it's not worth it. We'll be fine, really. Heck, we are still having Drew take classes, because, well, he needs them more than I do. He's taken at least two breaks in his studies, and I've never really taken one. I only plan to be out one cycle, or about 2 months, so that's not too bad. Besides, as it's always said, there is no race towards a black belt. Taking a cycle off isn't going to hurt anything. I wanted to take a break a while ago, as I was really stressed out shortly after getting my black belt, but at the time, my employment was tied to me being a current student. Now that's not the case, so I can take the time off, and not worry about losing my job. I think it'll be good to take some time off anyway. I think I felt burnt out for a while, and as The Black Belt Mama has discovered through her ACL injury and recovery is that sometimes absence makes the heart grow fonder, as she yearns to be back at the dojo. Me, I miss it a little bit (I still have one more paid week right now for myself), but after two months, I'm sure I'll be ready to jump right in again. It was a decision that I made to help out my household so we can stay afloat for a bit-- we should be back on our feet by the time I plan to return. And to have Drew stay-- I think he'll benefit from being the solo guy for a while. He's still proud to have a green belt finally, and this gives him some time where the TKD is HIS thing, now just OUR thing.

So that's that. I'll still be updating about Drew's progress in class, because I think it's important for people to understand how a kid with several learning disabilities can progress. And heck, I like to think of myself as a proud mother who tries to understand the best and worst in her child, and I can explore that-- or at least one aspect of it-- here.

I might also take the opportunity to finally write some essays in rebuttal or otherwise of my own from my own personal martial arts view. I've often read some of The Black Belt Mama'scomments, or another favorite's, John's Martial Views, and thought that if I wrote a comment, I would be writing almost a mini essay, and I should write a post about it rather than clutter up their blog comments. But I haven't gotten to it yet. So John and BBM (among others), be ready for some commentary which may or may not run along the same lines as your thinking, but hopefully would bring about a lively discussion! ;-) We'll see. I know there's at least one that I hope to write about that has to do with Extreme Martial Arts, because I have a slightly different perspective, I think, than most, since I have friends who are involved in XMA, including world and state champions.

In the meantime, I'll close this post with something that I found amusing about how my martial arts education has influenced my "real world" life. I am the den leader of Drew's Cub Scout group. All the kids and most of the parents know that I have my black belt in TKD, having even set up a kids' self-defense seminar with one of the ATA masters at the beginning of the year. So, tonight was the annual Blue & Gold dinner, which is a big to-do where the kids get their rank patches and such. During the dinner, one of the boys asked me if I could "karate chop" his ice cube that was in a napkin. For whatever reason, he wanted crushed ice. So of course, the parents there are egging me on to do it, and I said I'd try. I took the ice cube, which I think was slightly melted, in the napkin, and figured that a good palm heel hit would do the trick. Sure enough, it did, and the parents were surprised, and of course, the kid was delighted. The parents then were telling me, and teasing me a bit too, that I really know how to keep the kids in line and such. One dad even said as a reminder at the beginning of ther year, I should take a board and break it just to remind them who's boss! LOL I laughed too (because it WAS funny), but just explained that a lot of the attitude I have in there really stems from my experience in the leadership program at the ATA. Courtesy, respect, discipline, and focus seem like things that the Cub Scouts try to instill in the boys too, so I just carry it over. After all, they need to respectfully and courteously listen to others if they want to be heard themselves and expect the same from others. It seems pretty logical to me, so it's just a matter of me trying to enforce that as best as I can. I'm just glad that the parents appreciate that I try to do that. As a result, I can say that my den is one of the better behaved dens in our Cub Scout Pack, and I plan to keep it that way straight until they are Boy Scouts. So there you go.

One more set of classes, then that much deserved break...

Post #275

2008-02-20T23:14:00.002-05:00

Yes, I've actually posted that many times. Hard to believe, huh?

Anyway, tonight was tough. I am physically wiped out. Now, I admit that I haven't been working out as much, and it shows, but there's a point where you have to say, enough is enough!

Drew skipped this week (well, at least until Saturday) as he's been sick, and while today was his first good day post-illness, I didn't want to chance it with him getting tired in class and then Mr. Hyde coming out (instead of remaining Dr. Jeckyll). In retrospect, he probably would've been okay, but I don't think I was up to it myself, staying there that long and getting 101 things done before getting him to class.

I still went to my double class tonight, however. It was a partial mistake. I should've just taken one. As I mentioned last week, my asthma has been kicking in something fierce for the past two weeks. I had some relief a few days ago when we had a freak spring day that was almost 70F outside, but now it's plunged down again below freezing. Bleeh. Between that affecting my health and some sleep deprivation dealing with a sick child over the long weekend, I went into class quite tired and worn out already. But I figured that if I didn't go to class, that wasn't going to help me since I was starting to feel out of it. A little exercise wasn't going to hurt me. That was until I found out that RA was teaching class, because SW is at Spring Nationals (even though most of the US is in the dead of winter, so I don't know why they call it Spring Nationals). I haven't taken an RA class in a long time, and now I remember why. He's tough. Not that is a bad thing. He's very good with his technique. He just got his 3rd degree black belt last week-- sick, no less, according to him. Well, his thing tonight was that what got him through his testing in his sick condition was endurance. (Personally, if you've ever watched him, and he's studied several forms of martial arts, he's a natural, so to me there was little doubt that he wouldn't get it.) He said that if he didn't torture himself with long practice sessions and such, he wouldn't have made it in his worn out condition. Lemme tell you, his worn out is everyone else's BEST. Nonetheless, he felt that is was his job to start getting everyone else's endurance level up. Oh great. So we had to do all these running drills and exercises in between to get our heart rate up. Crap, between my bad knee, my asthma and just feeling out of shape and worn out, it was brutal. Then, in practicing our forms, he said, "Oh, I'll teach you segment #1 of yours." What? What rock have you been hiding under? I know the whole thing, thank you very much! Well, instead he wanted me to work on the first segment or so. One thing I have to work on is more one handed techniques, as I still tend to do things as if I was a color belt/double handed technique. Well, at least I'm not sloppy like some of the kids! So, it feels a little different, but fine. I worked on my 20 second freestyle that I have to add to my SJB routine. It just needs some practice for one or two catches, but RA liked the releases that I did at the end and felt the main choreography was good. Then we sparred-- forget board breaking. I went up against a green belt dad who hasn't been around in a long time. Turns out he had knee surgery, but he was in good shape, as he was doing the bobbing and weaving a lot more than I would, and since I was pretty wiped, it ended up being a good match, but I SWEAR it was more than a 2 minute round. It felt like an eternity. I was completely wiped out, and had to get a very long drink of water to try to revive myself while I tried to catch my breath-- literally! (Water is liquid oxygen, as far as I am concerned.)

Did I stop there? No. Glutton for punishment that I am, stupid as I am, I stayed for Instructor class. Next to nobody was there. The P family was there, AS and NC were there, and me. That's it. I partnered up with NC, since she admittedly was out of practice herself (she does other sports, but quit her winter sport just near the end of the season), so it seemed like a good idea. Usually she is one of the stars here, but she's out of it too, so it was a good matching up. We started with "pyramid" kicking drills, as RA was still on his endurance kick (no pun intended). YOu know, start with 1 kick, then 2 consecutive kicks, then 3, then 4, all the way to 10, then back down again. Oh, it was tough, but I felt I did a lot better than I expected in myself. And considering that I was the only one who was a holdover from the last class (usually there are more, but not tonight!), I thought that was pretty good. We did a few stretches, then did the same thing again with a different kick, but less of them. We worked on our form, but again just the first section, so I felt like there wasn't much for me to improve once I got my stuff fixed. Then with weapons, same thing-- I just need practice, but I was getting tired, so it was getting harder to do. RA decided in this class to do board breaks. I don't think it was a good night for board breaks for anyone. I tried my upset knifehand again, but used wood just to get used to an open hand. Seems that on a pad, I can do it right with my open hand, but on wood or plastic, it's a different story. Now, I did break my wood, and it appears I did it correctly, or pretty close to correctly. My hand doesn't hurt or feel like I have a potentially hairline-fractured bone this time. But it still stung like hell at the time, and where the board broke was very high. Instead of the board broken pretty close to the middle, it was more like 1/4-3/4 with the leftover pieces it was weird. Oh well. At least it broke, and it was on something a little more plyable than the plastic! The thing that pissed me off the most was that this is normally a 45 minute class. Not that RA remembers that, considering he hasn't been to a instructor/leadership class in ages. Since the new schedule kicked in, he kept us the whole hour, and so we got out at 9:15, which is a half hour later than we normally get out. YUCK. He felt we had a few more minutes to get one round of sparring, and essentially I said NO WAY. I was too worn out, feeling too sick. And he said something blah blah blah it's tough taking two consecutive classes for anyone, blah blah blah, gotta keep working at least so go work on a bag. So as everyone else is getting gear on, I'm working on the bag, but they haven't sparred yet. After a while, I just said screw it. I bowed out, changed, came home and changed into my jammies to collapse! Now that I've had some time to relax and watch Project Runway, I'm still feeling it. I hurt all over. It was too much at once. I really do know my body, and I need to listen. There are times to push, and there are times NOT to push, and I went over the line tonight.

And on that note, I'm going to bed. I'm wiped. So much for MY endurance. :-S

All hail the new green belt! (Photos included!)

2008-02-13T19:56:00.006-05:00

Tonight was testing night. I normally don't go at the same testing time as Drew, which is for the camo-black kids. I usually go with the teens and adults. But I decided to cut myself a break, and with SW's permission, I came at the same time as Drew tonight. I'm not the only parent who does it, but I think it was a first for me, at least doing it that way at this school. (I did do a testing at the same time with him at Pennington once, but that was quite a while ago.)

For me, it was just a midterm. Midterm #2 (of 12) to be exact. So all I do is progress forward. The next midterm is one that "counts" more, as that's when SW has to send scores on that one.

But let's talk about Drew first, because it was more his night. For most testings/graduations, he's been hesitant to go. He's even acted up in the middle of testings as well. Tonight was a night where he really showed a lot more poise than he ever has, if you ask me. He was part of the second group up, as there were only two Tiny Tigers, himself and a tiny little 4 year old girl who was the same rank. (She started very early, as her big brother is a black belt.)

Drew was doing his moves so fast, that the camera was catching him as if he was a ghost! Look!

There's a good palm heel...

He's super fast!

Even with his weapon, you have to watch the little ninja...

Then, there was the sparring:

Drew sparring. He's in the back facing us. Keep in mind that the kid that Drew is sparring just got his red belt tonight (about 4 belts/5 cycles ahead), and he's 2 years older than him too!Love Drew's dance moves towards the end. :-P

As I was helping Drew get his gear off as quickly and hurriedly as I could, I was called up for my testing for my midterm. Well, I had to run, and with my asthma being extra bad right now due to the bad weather we've been having the last few days, running was not good. I barely got my breath, and I was having to go almost straight into my form. I was set up to "perform" with two little boys who were at the same midterm. I just decided that I would go at my own rate. I didn't even pay attention to them, because most of the time, those kids are racing ahead of me, and damn it if they couldn't just wait for me to be done, if need be. Well, lo and behold, I ended up finishing before them. It wasn't perfect, but it flowed for the most part, and it was fine. It hurt for me to hold my last stance due to my knees (my knees went commando, aka no knee brace so I had flexibility for the night) until she gave me the go-ahead to stand at ease. With weapons, I think the trick was, believe it or not, making sure that my sleeves were rolled up enough so my SJB wouldn't get caught in them! But I took my time, made all my catches, and that went smoothly. And again, I still beat the kids to finish. Oh, I know, it's not a race, but I was surprised that I finished as quickly as I did. Then it was off to sparring on the back floor, in which I had to spar an adult green belt guy. It wasn't much of a spar, especially since I was keeping in mind that I needed to back off for the lower ranks. I'm sure I did fine. I was totally exhausted by the end, the asthma being no help.

Once it was all said and done, it was time for the promotions, and SW handed awarded Drew his green belt:

Getting his new green belt.

Afterwards, Drew was trying to tie his new belt on himself. Here, he's trying to show me what needed to be done.

"Mom, can you help me tie this?"

Hooray! It's tied!

In the end, we have a very proud, very happy new Green Belt!

Drew showing off his new belt!

I'm no Karate Kid, at least not yet

2008-02-06T21:57:00.000-05:00

I'm still not used to my work routine, so by the end of the day, I'm really wiped out. Tonight was the first Wednesday in a LOOOOONG time that Drew didn't go to classes (he's going on Saturday instead) and only I went for my doubled up classes. Sure enough, unlike yesterday, Drew's class was sparsely attended, and it would've been better had he come today in comparison to the total chaos from yesterday. Oh well. For me, classes were about the same as usual. I do think I have my form down fairly decently, for what it's worth, other than having the ki-haps. They are the icing on the cake, so to speak, to me. I'm more worried about what my body is doing more than my voice. I also discovered that I need to roll up my jacket sleeves one more notch so that my SJB doesn't get caught on them. I'm glad that next cycle I get to add on a 20 second freestyle to it, because I'm otherwise bored with the form (we all know my big distaste for the SJB), and I just want to move ahead to the BME. Most people don't like the BME, but I don't mind it. Still like the SN best, but unless I start working on an XMA routine, I don't get to study it again formally until I'm a second degree. Anyhow, we did a practice graduation, and I think I did alright. I got no commentary, so I suppose it was fine, except the messups in the SJB with the sleeve, but otherwise, I think she knows that I know the information. I did hold double boards for a brown belt, SM, who was doing his permission to test tonight. I was the only gal holding, but I was fine. I had a good partner to hold with me, PT.

When it came to be my turn, I decided to practice the upset knifehand again, but try it open handed, not like the hammer fist version. I was told my technique was good, but I needed more speed. Okay, no problem. And then WHACK! (No, that wasn't a break.) I attacked that board, missed the line (it was the plastic, but had done it with a lot of force that it hurt my hand. Turns out, I did it wrong. I hit it with the outside of the knuckle by my pinkie (turn your hand with your palm facing up, and it's the outside of that pinkie knuckle), where I should have used that PLUS the whole rest of the side of my hand. Um, ouch! As soon as she had me close my fist and do it like a hammerfist again, BAM! It went through. I was told it was not only the part of my hand that I hit was wrong, but I need to angle my hand a little more to ensure that I'm using that correct part of the hand. Bleeh! My hand was swelling up, and I can still move my pinkie, thankfully, but not easily, depending on the task. I did take my double Motrin for the pain and swelling, and it seems to be working. I broke the same part of my knuckle about 18 years ago, but with my other hand, so I have a pretty good idea of how that feels. This isn't as bad. I couldn't move my hand at all that time. I think this is just a really bad bruise, at least right now. We'll see how I am in the morning, but I think I need to lay off that break for a while!

Instructor class has something interesting. SW got a new "freestyle" form from one of the senior masters, because a lot of kids end up repeating the same "freestyle" form over and over (Drew is one of them), and they get bored doing it every other or every three cycles or so. It was definitely an interesting form! I don't technically have to learn it unless I'm helping to teach it, but hey, it helps me help Drew if he ever wants to master it. It's a form he'll like. All I'll say is that there are a few new moves for the kids, including a shoulder roll, which we think they'll like! I think Drew will like it.

So, have you ever seen that scene in Karate Kid II when they are in the bar and they are trying to break all those sheets of ice in betting, and Daniel-san breaks all of them? Well, that's the break I'm working on. Evidentally, I'm still working on that first sheet of ice. Could've used it for this hand, that's for sure. :-S

Oh well. There's always something to work on. I want to feel like I can break all the sheets, even if I'm only breaking one board, y'know?

Mama Bear had her claws out!

2008-02-06T00:31:00.000-05:00

Think of an image like Marvel Comics' Wolverine character, but looking something more like me. Then you can imagine the image I had in my head of myself tonight during Drew's class.

The week before graduation/testing is always insane. But tonight was particularly insane. There were two classes going on at once, so there was a lot of noise from that. Throw in a screaming toddler (and I mean SCREAMING), parents talking louder than usual, and Drew's class ki-hap-ing extra loud, you can imagine my poor kid with sensory integration dysfunction going nuts. I mean, I have SID too, and it was unnerving me as well, but I can grit my teeth and bear it a little better being an adult. But what really was pissing me off was that my kid, who is finally starting to learn to speak up and speak to an instructor or teacher when he's having trouble, said something and it was partially blown off. What was worse was that several of the kids in his class that were around him saw it fit that when seeing him freak out with the loud ki-haps, even when he asked nicely for them to stop doing it quite so loud, they proceeded to ki-hap to the point of a scream, thus freaking him out more on purpose. I could see it in their beady little eyes-- they wanted to taunt him more with their actions. In my head, my claws were sharpened, and I was ready to pounce on those little brats. Eventually, Drew just removed himself from class, came and cried on my shoulders while holding his ears. All that noise, the school ambiance paired with the yelling in his class was just too much. When they finally started "practice graduation", I knew it would be quieter, and it was, so he joined class again. Later when he was sparring, he was one of the first to get his board broken, thus he was sparring the longest, so he was tired and opted out, but sat nicely on the side of the mats until everyone was done.

I spoke to JZ (who was teaching the class), and I was glad that she did say something in general to the kids about their ki-haps, but I had to explain to her what was happening to Drew. When I said something to SW, she said she saw him go over to me, and she didn't do anything, because she knew exactly what was going on, so she didn't want to interfere. But I made it clear that several of the kids-- without naming names-- were intentionally yelling louder to bother Drew, and in turn, that bothered me a LOT.

This is a school that likes to pride itself in teaching respect, especially for kids that have special needs or are different. Drew is one of those kids. The kids who were essentially being bullies were not being respectful of him. And I wasn't going to let that go unsaid. I pay a lot of money for my kid to get the same TKD education as everyone else, and I want him to have a positive experience, but it's difficult under these circumstances. Hopefully next week, with graduation, things will calm down. We are starting to make some significant strides with him, and I don't want to backslide because of some little creepy brats.

Like I said, Mama Bear has her claws out. I'm not afraid to use them either. But hell, you can only imagine the constraint I had to have with myself to not jump right out there and clobber those kids, or at least give them the verbal reaming of their life.

That earned him a treat!

2008-02-02T17:24:00.000-05:00

While I plod along with my curriculum these days, Drew continues to work on his. Because he missed class on Tuesday, I brought him to a Saturday specialty class. Usually that's a half hour class on one thing, like just sparring, or just forms, etc. Today, I was bringing him to forms class, as that's what he needs the most work on. The sparring class was before that, and while he has control issues, he does like sparring. "I want to be in that class the next time," he told me. I told him that the next time we come on a Saturday, he can do both. I think he likes one of the teen instructors, JK. I like JK too, he's very good. Between JK and BP on Saturdays, I think he responds to both those teen guy instructors well. I think part of what surprised me about going today was that Drew said he'd go willingly, and he didn't fight me about going. Maybe because he knew it was a shorter class, but he almost volunteered, which is not like him.

We get to class, and he has the wiggles, but he does try his best to control them, and he does lose his focus a bit, but no more than usual. There were two main highlights for me. The first highlight was that he was being very patient and behaving himself during drills. They were doing some floor exercises where they had to jump through a ladder-like thing for speed and footwork techniques. There were a lot of kids in the class, but at no point did he get in other kids' faces, and he kept his hands to himself, and didn't jump all around. He was patient and just waited his turn to go across the floor. That was a big deal in itself. But the bigger deal was when they were practicing the form. He's still the youngest and lowest ranked in there, and between that and his inability to always focus as much as he'd like (ADHD is SO much fun that way!), he was starting to lose his place and was having difficulty keeping up. He finally piped up, and told BP, who was leading the class at that point, that BP was going too fast, and could he please slow down a little bit? Oh, it was music to my ears! And I have to say, it was to BP's, as well as SW's when she heard what he did. We have been waiting for Drew to say something if it was going to frustrate him, to speak up if someone was going too fast, or if he needed some help. He finally did it! And of course, BP was more than happy to slow down a little bit, especially since it was a part that Drew didn't have to know, but he was trying to keep up with the kids who did have to know. This was huge! I don't think he's ever done that, and he did it very politely--not shouting it out or crying or having a tantrum or anything!

After class, I gave him positive praise, as did BP and so did SW when she heard. As she said, this is what we've been working towards for SOOO long. Let's hope he can keep this up! To appease the instant gratification in him (as we all have), I let him get a piece of candy from the convenience store next door to the do-jahng. He was very happy with his Wonka "Donut".

I really hope that some things that we've been working on at home, school, and at the do-jahng are really starting to click with him, like speaking up politely instead of flipping out, and he can still get a positive resolution in most respects. Let's see if this sticks now, now that he's seen that what we've been telling him actually works....

Cruising along

2008-01-31T19:57:00.000-05:00

I know I haven't written here in a while. Sorry about that! It's been a couple of crazy weeks with life outside the do-jahng, but Drew and I still have been going to classes as best as we can. For the most part, there's not a whole lot to report. Last week was the first week I didn't go to daytime class in a long time. That feels a little odd now. I've always gone to the daytime classes offered since I started, but now with the new job, I can't go. (I only work part-time, and it's during the same hours.) So to hear SW say, "In my daytime class..." and not be a part of that feels really, really weird. I guess I'll have to get used to it. :-S Sandy's not there right now anyway, as she is still recovering from her injury, so I don't miss it. It's only fun when she's there. Otherwise, it's a sea of white belts, and two or three black belts, and of those 2-3 black belts, only one (KW) is someone I'd want to do a workout with or have as a partner working on stuff (that is, other than Sandy, of course). The other two are older women who just don't put any oomph into their workout, and the one that's almost a 3rd degree, WS, is so "fragile" that if I even put the slightest bit of power, she tried to compensate by moving out of the way with the pad (which doesn't help) or I have to basically tap a pad rather than hit it. Oy. So in that sense, I don't miss it, but at the same time, it was a good daytime activity.

I have continued with my Wednesday night classes still. Drew's been trying very hard in his classes too. He still gets the wiggles and gets in trouble for it sometimes, especially if he's looking at himself in the mirror or not paying attention to the directions or whatever, but I still have seen a lot of improvement in the last few classes. There was a class last week where he was extra bouncy (which was my fault,because I let him have caffeine before class, my bad), and SW was on top of him constantly and disciplining him. Instead of having crying fits and becoming uncooperative, he would just comply without an attitude. That's a HUGE step forward. Really. Even yesterday, I was told that when he was starting to lose a little control in sparring, NK put him on one of the bags, which he hates to do, but he complied and didn't cry or cause any further problems. That's a huge step forward for him, I think. No major outbursts or attitudes. And yesterday, that was considering it was the day after he was diagnosed with an ear infection (yes, he's properly drugged up now, so he's fine.). Does he know his form, or at least what he has to know? Yeah, for the most part he does. Is he keeping better control? Yes, I see some improvement, but there's still room for more improvement. You have to take the positive strides, no matter how small, and feel some accomplishment.

Drew did have an incident at school yesterday in which he and some other boys were goofing off in the boys' room, and they were playing "play boxing". Well, Drew often forgets his own strength, and hit a kid in the chest a little too hard. He admitted it was an accident, that they had gotten carried away, and he understands that when he's playing, especially without gear, it's "no contact" (and he understands that means no touching). In retrospect, and I didn't think of this until now, I should be glad that he hit the kid in the chest, because that means he understands he isn't supposed to hit the face! :-P

As for myself, I took my classes as usual last week-- both regular adult/teen classes and the instructor class, but this week I only took the adult/teen class. I was just way too tired, and I'm a little sick too, so I didn't want to overdo it. The new job has changed up my routine a lot, and between lack of sleep from the night Drew woke up with his ear infection as well as me starting to come down with something myself...well, I wasn't in good shape to do two workouts in a row as usual. I think for all the time I've put in prior to now, I've earned the right to take off sometimes. Granted, graduation is in two weeks, but I'm fine. I have my whole form down. It's not always pretty due to the jumps and spins that I have to do, but after watching some of the kids do it, I know that I do a more precise form than they do, and yet they still pass. I know the expectations are higher for me, but even so, I watched this little kid who's seveal midterms ahead of me and should know the form much better than I, and he was just, well, sloppy. No tucking of the hand not in motion, his jumps looking no worse than mine, etc. Even with me just getting the whole form down this cycle, it looks so much better than most people's. I haven't worked on my weapon as much. My main problem, as silly as it seems, is doing it with my uniform jacket on! I'm used to practicing without it, but then the sleeves get in the way and such. It's not a tragedy. I only have to do this weapons form with the SJB(numchakas) for the rest of this cycle, then add a freestyle at the end of it for the next cycle, and then I'm done with them for a while-- hooray! I'll be doing BME again next, and I'm actually thinking of investing in a new one. I have a non-handled one, and the balance on it is SOOOOOO different from the handle ones. The handle ones just feel SO MUCH BETTER. I'll think about it.

I have been working on some new board breaks, however. I guess that's what's new for me. One of the 1st degree board break combinations is a reverse jump side kick, with an upset ridge hand. I'm getting the hang of the reverse upset ridge hand. If I'm remembering correctly, this is the break that Ralph Macchio did in Karate Kid II, when he went through all those blocks of ice in that bet. Well, for now, I'm just working on getting it through one plastic board. :-P I was shown to start with a hammerfist of sorts, and then work towards opening the hand. I got it in about 2-3 tries or so, so that's cool. The reverse side is a little trickier. I have to get the jump in there soon enough, if this is a break I'm going to use.

Other than that, I was told yesterday that I have to watch my own control when sparring, specifically with lower ranks. I didn't realize that I was even doing that. I thought I was going fairly easy on people, but at the same time, making it challenging. Heck, nobody showed me THAT much mercy as I worked my way up! They would go easy on me, but not THAT much! I usually was put up against teenagers that were 2nd degrees while I was a piddly color belt! Oh well. I guess Drew and I both have control issues sometimes, as we can really get into it.

So that's the scoop. Not a heckuva lot going on right now. Just adjusting to new routines on the outside of the do-johng, battling illnesses, but still working on material and making progress. Graduation is in about two weeks. I only have to do my full regular and weapons form and sparring, and that's it. The next cycle will be an "official" midterm where the scores go to ATA HQ for my progress, and I'll have to do all that, plus add a 20 second creative form for the weapons form (I'm already working on that), and the board break of my choice. Hmmm. I guess I still have a lot of work to do.

Looking for creative solutions

2008-01-18T22:39:00.000-05:00

I cross posted this information into the Black Belt Knitters website, but I thought I'd show it here as well. Heck, I might even post it in my knitting blog as well.

Anyhow, in ATA TKD, during your second degree black belt curriculum, there comes a midterm that you have to do in which you create a totall creative form. It can be open hand or closed hand, and you can use traditional weapons as well as unconventional weapons as well. I've seen people use pool/billiards cues, golf clubs and the like before. So, even during my color belt time, I would be looking ahead, thinking about what I might use when my turn came in a few years.

So, here I was, cruising the internet (as usual), looking at some new knitting websites I hadn't seen before, as I was looking for a specific yarn that's becoming difficult to find. In one of the shopping sites, I found this:

(You can check out more details at this shopping site when you click here.

Yes, those are what you think they are. GIANT KNITTING NEEDLES. Oh, what a grand discovery for someone like me who loves knitting AND TKD! So, you can guess what I'm thinking. ;-) When I saw this, I thought, "A-HA!". I could see using these in place of a double short ecrimas/double bahng-mah-ee for a routine. Oh, that would be too rich!

Hmm. I think I'll have to bookmark this one, in order to save it for the future. Oh yeah, I can see it now...heh heh heh...my instructor will just be rolling her eyes at this one, but I know it will certainly garner attention, for sure...

(same info cross-posted in my martial arts blog.

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

2008-01-17T08:45:00.000-05:00

Somehow the David Bowie song, "Changes" is going through my head as I write this. The lyrics don't apply, but the title certainly does.

On Tuesday, Drew's class was not so great. He's had much worse classes, but it wasn't a good one. He was getting in trouble for not cooperating during pad drill, but he was the worst of the class-- everyone in there was not cooperating. He got through the class, albeit very grumpy, but was holding his own. One thing he was very proud of, but I didn't see, was that he's been practicing a fancy kick that he saw in one of his Hot Wheels DVD during a fight scene. He decided to try to use it in sparring, and SW noticed. She told him that he was evidentally doing a butterfly kick, which is a fairly advanced jump kick. I don't think they start to teach that until you are at least a second degree. So, he left on a high note on that.

Wednesday was busy for both of us. My morning class went alright. I was paired with WS, when I wanted to be paired with KW instead. WS and KW are second degrees, and well, KW is the stronger student. WS is, as I've said, this weak little thing that can get the job done, but in pad drills, I basically have to tap the pad, and can't put any force into what I do, because she'll just fall over. Whereas KW-- wow-- she is one of the best martial artists at our school, when she comes. She takes periods of time off, as she's more dedicated to her kids' schedule than her own, but she doesn't miss a beat. Instead, she was paired up with a white belt. Bleeh. I don't get as much of a workout when I'm stuck with WS. This is one reason that I miss Sandy! Anyway, the drills of the week, both in my classes and Drew's classes have dealt with side kicks, and man, my hips were sore last night. But in the morning class, I was the only first degree there, so as usual, I had to work on my material on my own. SW has a lot of people in the beginner ranks right now, so she spends most of her time with them. There are a lot of white belts in there right now, so they need the extra attention. I did get some refinements, as I have some difficulties with two transitions, and I'm still getting the whole form memorized. I don't have any idea where the ki-haps go, but that's, as I often say, the icing on the cake. She remembered that I'm only in my 2nd midterm (out of about 12 that I have to do before getting to 2nd degree), so she didn't seem too worried right now, and said that my main objective right now was memorization of the form. I think part of it was because I said that I really wanted to work on the form, but I don't feel like I will be anywhere near competition form by April. She feels I should still go, because it's good for the practice. I don't want to go if I feel I'm not even good! At least the last one, I felt confident that while my weapons were bad, at least my 1BR form was still good (and the last time I did it was the best I had ever done it), and sparring would give me a chance. Oh well.

During the first evening class, KW had come in to help, and she was very nervous because it was the first time that she was leading a class. Yes, there were some flaws in what she did, but overall it went well. She should have moved some people around and paired people up. I was paired up with an 11 year old boy, and another large woman, SP, who is a camo belt, was paired up with Mr. Blue Belt. He's not really a good match for anyone smaller than him or well, as sexist as this sounds, with a woman. Fortunately, KW caught onto him fast, and told him that he was putting WAY too much power and energy into what was just a drill, and fortunately he listened. But I could see poor SP having a Dickens of a time dealing with him. And I felt, for the second class in a row, that I wasn't getting the kind of workout I should have gotten because I wasn't really paired up with someone who was at the same level. But at least when we went to practice our forms and weapons, I was with my "girls", the C sisters and one of the G brothers, so I had good company,and they could help me out with getting some of the kinks out of my form. Because of lots of kicked fingers and extra sore hips from teaching sidekicks all day, SW asked for help with board holding. She confessed to me later that she said she really didn't want to hold for the brown boards, because those guys are way too rough and powerful, and she didn't think she could hold up. For blue and green boards, with a strong helper (like myself), then she could do some. Naturally, I stepped up to the plate. She could still advise with the breaks. She's very good at verbally explaining exactly what you have to do to adjust if you don't make the break. Since I was the last one, she and Dr. T (he's so funny) held for me. I learned a new break, since I'm trying a few new things out. It was the start of an upset knifehand break. She had me do it like an upset hammerfist first. It went through on the second try, which is pretty cool. I think if I try it again, I'll be able to do it open handed. Sparring was not all that eventful, but Dr. T was disappointed that I didn't spar him, as I'm one of the few women who can keep up with him to some degree, and he's always waiting to get kicked in the head. ;-)

Instructor class was a little interesting. She split us into groups, and each group was to give a mini demonstration and talk about a life skill. Well, at our school, we don't talk much about life skills (goals, respect, discipline, etc.), but rather act through example or mention it in passing through example. We don't lecture about it that much necessarily. I was paired up with EL and AS. It was an interesting match up. EL knows her stuff very well, and it was she that told me, when it was my turn to teach, that I did really well but didn't really talk about the life skills we were supposed to be working on much. According to her, at certification camps, they really harp on that point a lot, so it's just something to work on, but otherwise, I did a good job. For her, the only criticism I had, and I think it's only because she is in a wheelchair and naturally doesn't think of it right away, is reminding the students where their beginning and landing foot should be if they are doing a foot drill, such as, start with right leg back, and it should land in the front, bring it to the back again, etc. That's an easy adjustment, and she agreed that she forgot about that. Oh, but AS. Now, I know the kid has a lot of learning diabilities and such, but this wasn't rocket science. He chose to teach a jumping slide side kick, which we had done in the class before. That was fine. But, all he had to do, at the most basic level, was to demonstrate it and break down the kick (chamber, slide jump, kick, rechamber). Again, not rocket science. He just couldn't do it. I was trying to get him to think how he would break it down. In the end, the "student" (me) was teaching the teacher how to teach. EL told me after a bit that I needed to let him figure it out, but I think she forgets how much prompting he needs. We both also had it a little hard because being that she's SA, she expects that we would be able to come up with an adaption for her. Well, that's asking a little much. For me, for the kick AS was trying to do, I would have her do the jump in the chair and knifehand (the latter of which she explained was the wheelchair sidekick). Evidentally, that's not correct, but at least it would have been a good guess, and she would have done it. AS could even come up with that. But I don't think it's fair that she would expect that. Our school is a little exceptional in that we do have a lot of SA kids in there, and SW has been working with them for MANY years, and we're still learning how to teach abled kids. But oh, working with AS was worse than trying to pull teeth! He just had no clue whatsoever. Even when I went last, EL was critiquing about the life skills stuff, and he was stuck talking about that. It took three attempts by me to steer him back to simply giving his own critique-- "A, go back to the beginning. What did you think about MY performance? You agree with [EL]? OK, that's fine. Is there any good or bad things about my performance that she left out?" I mean, THAT basic. I applaud the kid for trying, but man, I don't think he'll ever be able to be a full-time instructor. He literally just doesn't have the mind for it!

So, it was a long day of classes, but they went okay.

But, I know you are saying, okay, Windsornot, this sounds like a fairly typical entry from you. What's "changing", as the subject heading implies? Well, it's this: Thursday, January 17th, 2008 is my last day working at the ATA. I've been looking for a new job for almost a year for financial reasons. While there was some great flexbility in having this part-time job, the pay was less than desirable, and for a while now, especially recently, we've really needed to start pinching pennies. An agency which I had applied to a while ago called me on Monday offering me a temp position at a local healthcare philanthropy foundation (a very big, well known one, in fact) that is only one mile from my house, still giving me part-time hours, is more in line with the kind of work that I'm trained and have experience in doing, and the biggest part is that they are paying me more than twice the hourly rate that I'm getting at the ATA. How could I say no? I figured out that even when I took out taxes and even my TKD tuition funds from the paychecks, the net from the new one would be about 5-6 times more than what I'm taking home now. I start very shortly, and I'm looking forward to it. Since my employment is no longer tied to my training, if I want to take that long awaited break that I wanted to take back right after I got my black belt, I could without any guilt now. I'm not going to, since there's a regional tourney in April, and I really need to train for that. I'm thinking that if I give Drew the summer off, I'll take the summer off too. I have been training for almost 2 1/2 years nonstop, so I think I need a slight breather in a while. We'll see. But it's kind of the end of an era. I've worked for SW for almost a year and a half. She was already recruiting my replacement yesterday after my morning class, which is fine. Starting ther was a good place to get my feet wet again in the work world. At least it was in a familiar place with familiar faces, and that helped. The new job is going to be a total surprise. New place, new faces, etc. I'm a little nervous about it, but I've been assured that I'm more than qualified for the position, so it should be fairly easy for me. Even NM was happy for me, and said that she was glad that I could move on. She was also nice enough to tell me that a lot of people had always said kind comments about me being helpful while doing my Front Desk duties over time, so that was nice to hear. Part of me will miss the familiarity of being there, as the ATA is one of my "other homes". But, it's also time for a change of pace and a new challenge. And while I'm very nervous about that, I need to remind myself that I am a Black Belt. When I put my mind to it, I can meet any challenge I choose.

Bribery CAN work!

2008-01-12T12:53:00.000-05:00

Drew's been sick lately. It wasn't until very recently-- and by the DENTIST, no less, -- that we figured out what was going on with his health. He's finally on the upswing again, so I had made him promise that since he had missed so many TKD classes lately due to his illnesses, that he had to go to Saturday classes today. Just so as not to push my luck, I told him that he only had to attend forms specialty class, and not sparring, weapons or board breaking. He was fine with that. But the agreement was, too, that if he wanted, I would attend class with him, and that's what he wanted. Okay, I could do that. It's only Songham #5. Been there, done that.

So, we went off to class. I had to remind him about behaving in class today and listening, keeping his hands to himself, etc. I also told him that if he behaved, then we could go to the convenience store next store after class and get a juice or ice tea. Well, that was not enough, so I broke down and promised him something I rarely do-- I promised him some candy. Now, just so you know, while like any kid he loves candy, he rarely gets it, so this would be a major treat if he succeeded. It was either that or going for fast food for lunch, and I figured the candy would be better than artery clogging french fries.

We went to class. He loves gathering the attendance cards, and did that very well remembering to say to the other kids getting the cards in their rows, "Thank you sir!" and bowing. And I think since I was in class, he liked bowing directly to me when we bow to the parents in the kids' class (as a sign of respect for them bringing us to class). I was then put with another adult in the class, who technically, if he hadn't taken several breaks, should have gotten his black belt WAY ahead of me, but he's still a red belt. (heh heh) Anyhow, turns out his son and Drew were paired up for warm up drills right in front of us, so we could keep an eye on them. Drew was antsy in class, but he was doing well with his kicks and holding the pads and such. Then, we were working on reverse side kicks. The first time you are doing it, it is a little bit of a difficult concept in what direction to go, how to shift your feet, etc. While BP was teaching class, he had RA, EL, and JK in class assisting, and so RA helped Drew get the hang of it. Once he helped Drew understand what he had to do, he did a beautiful reverse side, and I think he was pleased with himself. We then learned the segment which had to do with a back fist in a middle stance, stepping into the "T" to prepare for a sidekick, landing back in a middle stance with a twin low block, then twin inner forearm block. After doing that a few times, then we put the first segments together with it. I think that now that I have an 81 step form, a 34 step form is pretty easy. Guess that's experience talking for you! Drew had his wiggly moments, but generally, he kept to task, and with a few nudgings from me, he paid attention. BP said he was impressed when Drew answered up with the answer to what the next step was when we reverse the combination (always have to learn things on both side, right?). When we also were working on getting the kicks up high, he liked getting the praise of when he got his kicks up high, and got them up with correct body positioning.

So, while he had his moments, they weren't that bad. I think he was either distracted or excited when he had the moments, and that's not too bad, in comparision to the last few classes he's had, he had a really successful day. I think he felt good, and I felt good about it. Now that he's feeling better and back to himself, and had a good day in TKD, I think future classes will be a little better again.

And in case you are curious, he chose Wonka Chewy Gobstoppers. ;-)

The magic of endorphins

2008-01-09T21:56:00.000-05:00

Life is a little rough right now. Drew's been sick on and off for weeks, and due to that, it's stressful. Add to that trying to find a new job, juggling work and regular home life, then it's really stressful. Just today alone, I had to take Drew to the dentist because he was having problems in his mouth, and it turns out it's stuff the doctor should've caught the other day when I took him there. (Needless to say, I love my dentist for spending more time and figuring out the problem than the MD, who wasn't our regular MD, didn't.) That was a big chunk of my time this morning, and I missed class this morning. I went to work, did some stuff that was asked of me, went home, and encountered a very grumpy boy coming off the bus. He went to play, but then he fell, and that set the ball in motion for things to get worse. A tired, grumpy boy was more tired and grumpy than usual. That did not make life easy. To make matters worse, I get a phone call from SW that there are internet/website problems, and she wants me to figure out how to fix it. WHAH...? So, it took me an hour to get to the bottom of the problem, and the answers were pretty. Talk about adding fuel to the fire. I had already decided not to take Drew to TKD, because while he could do the movements, I didn't think he was well enough, at least with his attitude and grumpies that he would benefit from class, and I'd also be sparing the students and instructors in that class from his...issues of the day.

Needless to say, I was stressed enough that I was starting to cry in the car, because frankly, I really need a break, and there's no end in sight. If anything, it's going to get worse before it gets better.

So, I step into class, and it was a fairly large class. Mr. Blue Belt was in class, but SW was teaching, so I was glad when she paired me with another woman, SM, who I've known before, but hasn't been in class lately, and is a camo belt. Being that SM and I are both fluffy gals, it was a good match, because there was no pressure to do miraculously. Because it was a big class, and I was the only 1BD in there, as usual, I had to work on my own. Nothing new there. Because SW was running around taking care of everyone else, I was lucky that RA was there, which he hasn't been in a long time. (I think he was because he needs the practice time, as he's testing for his 3rd degree in February.) So he helped me a bit with the transitions I was having trouble with, and gave me the last part of the form. So now I have the whole form! Now, I have about a month to get it down well enough to at least be passable. I will be doing this same form for the next two years (okay, a little less than that if I don't take any breaks), so I think there's time for getting the nuances down and such. I didn't want to work on my weapon simply because I think my form needs more work. When we got to board breaking, Mr. Blue Belt tried to hold a board for someone else. I don't know why he thought he could do it. I was originally going to help SW, but since I was one of the few people in there that knows how to hold boards correctly (or I know more about it than most in that class), I held for the practices, and AS helped me hold for the break of this one person who was trying the dreaded run-jump-sidekick break. Now, AS is a 3BD. He should know - even better than I - how to hold a board. But no. I was the "expert" this time. Fortunately, SW came over to help the student (a transfer adult from S. Brunswick, whom I actually have talked to and like), and there was no criticism of my holding, so I was fine. :-) For myself, since I'm still trying to figure out what to do, I wanted to try a new board break. This break is a reverse side jump kick. In breaking it down, it's not too bad, and SW was helping me get the feel for it. I see what I have to work on in just getting the reverse side kick down first, and then we'll add the jump. Not too shabby. Sparring wasn't too bad. I sparred two younger kids today, and the first girl, oh, I could tell she was really tired, as she usually has twice as much spunk as usual, and tonight, she barely punches or threw any kicks. The second one was a boy who I've worked with before, and I think I was wearing him down tonight too. I was even teasing him, trying to get his gumption up with, "Hey, Mrs. V is bugging me...I can't let that happen!", as if I was his inner thoughts talking aloud. He took in in stride and good humor, as he should. He knows I wasn't being mean, just being silly. So, it worked out okay.

Instruction class was just a matter of us practicing the one steps for Songahm #1. AS, again, as a 3BD, should be a lot more focused, and should definitely know a #2 front kick from a #1 front kick! Eesh. Sometimes you have to reel him in, and get him back on track, way too often. He's 15, but he's as bad as a 5 year old sometimes. Afterwards, being that there were a lot more 1BDs in this class, I was able to practice my form, and get some help from the C sisters, who are truly watching my back in getting the form down. ;-) When everyone else was working on weapons, I just continued on my form. I'll get it down, eventually. This needs more work than my SJB form. I already figured out my freestyle that I add at the end of the SJB form next cycle, so there you go. My regular form is not hard, but it's not easy either. Good thing that get to work on it for a long time!

In the end, by the time class ended, between working out and being around my friends there, I felt better. For those who do any kind of exercise regularly, they know about the endorphin high that often happens from working out. As much as I didn't really feel like going to class tonight, between not feeling that well both physically and emotionally, I'm glad I went. I still have the same problems, and still feel as bad, but don't feel as down about it, if that makes any sense. It was the boost I needed to get me through the rest of the night. That, and watching Project Runway when I got home. ;-)

One of the newest ATA Corner Judges is...

2008-01-05T16:59:00.000-05:00

ME!

I don't tend to go to the ATA on Saturdays much anymore. 1st degree classes are WAY too early in the morning on a Saturday for me, for sure, hence why I tend to cram so many during the week. But today was a long overdue seminar that had a good turnout. It was a Chevron Clinic. What is that, you non-ATA people are asking? In tournaments, you have to have judges, of course, who know the rules. Not just anyone can be a judge. You have to be at least a black belt of a certain level, a certain age, and you have to complete clinic/certification seminars on a yearly basis to certify or re-certify your status. Well, the age thing isn't a problem, but the rank level and having taken a clinic was the only thing in the way before. But now, I am a black belt, and having passed my first levels, I am now a corner judge for color belt matches. Hooray! What does that mean? First of all, you have to understand how the scoring works, how points are awarded, and all the other main rules that apply. One of the things that SW can tell you confidently, is that as the RCT (Regional Chief of Tournaments) for our area, she makes sure she attends all the seminars on judging and forms and ATA rules so that she is completely up to date. It turns out, too, that students who compete in weapons can only compete in weapons that their instructor are certified in, and she's certified in ALL of them. There are even Masters who don't recertify to judge or keep up their teaching certifications as well as they should, and she said it shows. But anyway, as a corner judge, you do not have to necessarily know the forms, but you do have to understand techniques. As a corner judge, you are assigned to only judge just hands or just feet. Center judges, which you can't do right away (I think I might be eligible next year) look at forms and overall performance of techniques. So, even if I know the form, and someone is supposed to do a sidekick but they do a roundkick, and it's a really well done roundkick, I am supposed to give them the point. The center judge will take off points for incorrect form.

So anyway, once you pass your clinic, to show your designation, you get to wear a special chevron patch on your lower right sleeve. The more things you certify to judge, the more chevrons you get, but there are only so many of them. But I got my Level 1 today, and that's pretty cool.

It's what Janet Jackson talks about...

2008-01-03T13:08:00.000-05:00

It's about CONTROL!!! (Her song just keeps going through my head as I think about it.)

After having a nice surprise yesterday, for the most part, classes went on as usual. Drew acted up in class. He couldn't keep his hands to himself, and was goofing off, hurt another kid, and said he was "bored" and acted up. Oh well. Another day at the ATA for Drew, as it was. My leadership class was cute, as two more teens/tweens came on board, and it's a small class, with some good kids in there. I was the only adult, other than MZ, who was learning her 3rd degree material while we worked on leadership stuff. (MZ already has her black collar, so she already is a very full-fledged certified instructor.) But prior to leadership class was a regular teen/adult class, and I got really pissed at a new student. I don't know his name, but I know he's new for sure, and must have transferred in from somewhere.

He was about as tall as I was, and reeked of cigarette smoke like he had had about 5 before walking into class. I'm guessing he was about 15 or 16 at least. MZ was teaching, and we were doing a sparring drill just on pads, and this kid and I were partnered up together. Well, all I have in my hands are two focus pads of sorts, and that's all. All we were required to do was a series of simple punch/jab/cross combinations, just to get into the rhythm of it. Well, first, when this kid held the pads for me, he held them too high, and too close to his face. I warned him that it was dangerous to do that, because I might accidentally punch him in the face with the pads so close to his face. He didn't care, no matter how many times I adjusted the pads. But then when it was my turn to hold the pads, whereby I did hold them far from MY face, he hit them with full force. And I mean FULL FORCE. C'mon, this is just a drill! This isn't even sparring, and even in sparring, you wouldn't need to hit that hard. After a few hits, I told him to back off a little, as he almost took my arm off by the shoulder (yes, he hit THAT hard), and that at graduation and tournament sparring that kind of punching would NEVER be allowed. But then it happened. He was trying to go so fast and hard that he missed the pad, and hit MY arm, on the inside part about 6 inches below my hand going towards my elbow. All I will say is that it is DAMN lucky he didn't break my arm. I could barely use my arm that well after that. I think he hit a nerve pretty badly, to say the least, because I could barely move my fingers for the rest of the night. I had to have my husband, later, help me get dressed and undressed, that's how bad it was.

We had to break boards, and since my hand was in no shape to be doing an actual hand break, I opted for my elbow, and that was fine. When we went to get our sparring gear on, which was painful for me to do, I went and asked SW if she could order me some forearm pads (I'd been thinking about it anyway), and told her what happened with the new Mr. Blue Belt. She asked if I said anything to him about backing off, and I told her I did, but I was still hurting. She said he was new, and she could quite figure out what his actual background was prior to this, but she suspects some of it was self-taught, and some of it was more from boxing. She had a pair of mismatched forearm pads that she sold to me at a discount since they were mismatched, but at least I have something now. We did things out of order, but my arm just hurt for the rest of the night, especially when doing forms. I couldn't really practice my SJB because my arm and hand hurt that much, so I just practiced with my left hand instead (which needed the work anyway). MZ did give me another huge section of my form, which helped too, but I just have to get the memorization down, and practice that. Thank goodness for the DVD video I have to help me review it if needed.

My arm hurt all the way home, so it was hard to drive, and as I said, my husband had to help me change. All I could do was ice it as much as I could, take an anti-inflammatory, and rest it. It did feel better this morning, and I can move my fingers again with less pain, but oddly enough there's no bruise there, but it still aches quite a bit. I'm just mobile now, and it's not as bad.

It just pisses me off that this kid had no control. I know this is a big issue with my own son, but he's 6 and doesn't know his own strength most of the time. I mean, I know some people reading this have had similar problems with some teens who don't use control, and unfortunately have broken some bones. I was spared this time, but I can tell you for a fact that I've sparred with a lot of the teen boys around here, and I have never felt like I was in danger, even with the ones who were bigger than me and really could wallop a punch if they wanted. Same with the adult men. The trick for that? Yep, you guessed it-- let's sing it like Ms. Jackson---"CONTROL". This kid had NONE. If I am ever paired up with this kid again, I will give him a very stern warning, and if he continues after the warning, then I see no reason to give him a taste of my powerful kick in his teeth.

Mixed Media

2008-01-02T16:43:00.000-05:00

You've heard of Mixed Martial Arts, right? Well, in this case, I present to you my newest treasured item:

My State Champ Quiltlet!

You've read on here about my good friend and competitor, Sandy, on this blog often. Sandy is not only a very talented TKD person, but she is also an incredibly talented and creative quilter. She's on a small hiatus from TKD as she has a bad ankle injury that she is healing from, but she came to class today to bring me this beautiful gift. If you can't tell, that's me in the mini quilt! :-) She knew that I really wanted to have a State Champ uniform, but it's just too expensive right now, so she made this as my "Christmas/Valentine's/Mother's Day/Birthday" present. She was very meticulous in the details. She even went as far as to make sure she had the hairstyle and hair color (I'm back to my natural blonde after a year of attempting life as a redhead/strawberry blonde), the color belt I was wearing as the color belt champ when at the tournament when I clinched the points for the title, my name on the back, the Weapons patch, and even the weapons I used for the winning routine. It's better than any uniform I could get, for sure! I can't wait to hang it up somewhere in my house to display it.

How can you beat having friends like that?

You never quite lose it altogether

2007-12-30T21:31:00.000-05:00

It's funny how people, especially kids, who aren't doing martial arts, find it incredibly cool when they see that you can do it, and actually see you demonstrate it, even if it's in a minor way.

Today Drew had a friend over who LOOOOVES Star Wars. He has two toy lightsabers, and Drew got one from Santa for Christmas. I made sure that the friend brought his so that Drew could actually have a little duel with him with an equal toy rather than galavanting around swishing at nothing and nearly hitting other things instead. There were rules, of course, that I made sure that the boys followed while they played, which were no-brainers for the rest of us-- don't actually swipe at a person, don't put the saber in someone's face, don't hit but if you do don't hit hard, etc. Basically, keep it to saber on saber action, and keep good control of your weapon, as simple as that. At one point, they wanted me to play, so since I didn't have my sword with me (it's kept at the school), I used my BME, which is a little shorter than what they had, but sufficed nicely. When I did the simple "roll down/roll up" action with my wrist, the friend said, "COOL! How'd 'ya do that?" It's one of those no-brainer things that you learn when you learn how to use a BME, but granted, once it becomes a natural thing, it does look pretty cool. I showed them some basics of gumdo, and then were teaching him the basic strike lines. It was cute, because when his mom came to get him, the boy remembered some of them pretty well, and she was impressed by his little display. I think he also thought it was cool that somebody else's mom would play lightsabers and know some cool "tricks" to make it look real showy like in the movies.

So, while I haven't used a BME in a while (I will again in a few cycles), you never quite lose those skills altogether. I might not be a master swordsperson by any means, or anything close to being that good in BME, but it's cool when you can impress a little kid like that with basic strike lines stuff. ;-) Makes you feel appreciated, and he also appreciated that his friend Drew was learning this stuff too. He liked seeing Drew's #3 jump round kick that he likes to do. It IS impressive looking.

Proof of support, holiday style

2007-12-26T13:06:00.000-05:00

It's a slightly sparse Christmas this year for us. Oh, my son doesn't know the difference, but the hubby and I didn't spend a lot on each other due to watching our finances. From him, I got a cool webcam that I've been wanting for my notebook PC (maybe I can start making practice videos of my forms!). But the other one, in many respects, meant more.

As you all know, I earned my 1st degree black belt back in October. Due to mess-ups at the ATA headquarters, I did not receive my black belt certificate until about a week or two ago. After showing my husband the certificate, I put it on top of his bookcase, which is a pretty safe place, for safekeeping.

So, on Christmas Day, I open up the Webcam, cool, and then I pick up another present. It feels like a frame, but I can't imagine what it could be. Once I opened it, I saw that he had gotten my black belt certificate framed in a beautiful walnut colored frame, very classic. He wanted to show me that he was proud of my accomplishment, and he wants me to be able to display it, so he got the framing done. It meant a lot to me that he understood how seriously I take it, and that he was proud of me-- enough to get that framing done. Now, we just have to figure out where to put this beautiful frame in our home-- somewhere that displays it proudly.

I hope all that celebrate Christmas enjoy the season, and for those who don't, please share the sentiments of peace, joy, happiness and camaraderie that Christmas brings with those around you. I believe that even if you don't celebrate Christmas, the sentiments and ideas that are supposed to be brought to the season are ones that ALL of us should abide. Feliz Navidad, Joyeax Noel, and Merry Christmas to all!

Holiday Hooky

2007-12-19T16:28:00.000-05:00

Well, with the exception of the class I went to this morning, Drew and I are playing hooky from TKD classes this week. We have no classes next week (yay!). So I think that constitutes another nice little break. Even SW said that even though this is not a "fun week" (whereby we don't have to do the regular curriculum), most likely nobody's going to remember this week's material after the break anyway, so that made me feel like it was okay. Between that and the fact that Drew is battling a cold (it started out as pinkeye on Sunday, and then bad congestion all yesterday through the night), PLUS I have a ton of things to do to prepare for the holidays, it made sense. Between teachers, me taking off on Friday, and having a big family to-do here at my house at lunchtime on Saturday, I have just to much to do. After that, leading up to Christmas, it's all downhill-- it'll be easier. So until then, it's the mad rush!

But I can take a moment to at least talk about my solitary class on the day that I normally take three classes. I do have to start by saying that it's nice to be in the black belt category rather than still with the color belts. The color belts in our adult day class are all beginners, and while I always appreciated people being patient with me at that stage and I do my best to do the same for those under me, I do like having the challenges of being a black belt more. I was working with the only white belt, MG. While she's been a parent of a special abilities child there for a long time, she is discovering, like many adults who start after their children, that it's not as easy as it looks, not that her son does very much compared with your average kid, as he has both cognitive disabilities and mild physical disabilities. But he tries! :-) His mom is doing her best, but it just seems like she doesn't get it completely nonetheless. Granted, she was being challenged today, but even getting a basic chamber-extension-rechamber concept was hard. Today, we were warming up with crescent kicks, and the whole concept eluded her, and I couldn't understand why. That was one of the easiest ones that I remember learning early on. Easy to remember too-- a crescent kick is like a crescent moon, so it's something where the leg is brought "over the moon", as I like to say, but with chambering and rechambering. For whatever reason, she wouldn't extend her kick that far either. She also had a hard time with the concept of a roundkick against a pad being with the upper flat part of your foot, like on the foot knuckles. She kept hitting everything with her toes. Between her crescents and her roundkicks, they looked the same. I tried to be helpful and encouraging as much as I could, and she was able to get it. She was very complementary about my performance at graduation last week, which I was surprised by that, but appreciative. But as a black belt, when I had to do drills and she held the pad, I had different things to do than she did which were a little more challenging.

One of them was doing a spin reverse hook kick. (Yes, I can hear you laughing already, Sandy.) I wasn't making the full spin when I practiced, so it was more like doing a #3 reverse hook kick rather than a #3 reverse spin hook kick. Think 180 degrees vs 360 degrees around. Yeah, now you have it. I had the basic concept down though, and that was what was important. As a result, we all started on the next sections of our form, or new forms as the case might be for some. For me, it was starting to learn the second half of my form. I started by practicing the first half, which I think I have down fairly well. I'm sure there's room for improvement here and there, lots of tweaking, but I have the jist of it, after all. I got the next parts in two segments. In the first new part, there's something where you do a rear stance where you do a slow upset ridgehand, pull it back and then do a slow spearhand. Well, duh on me, as first, I had to ask ES to go over it with me after I was shown, since being that I'm an old woman with all this Christmas stuff going through my head right now, it wasn't sinking in right away. (In my favor, however, I only had to be shown the segments twice before I got the hang of them, rather than 5 times, so that must be an improvement!). The second DUH was that I was facing a mirror, because I could watch myself to see if I was doing it right. There's times that I've mentioned where I know I'm doing something right, but it doesn't "feel pretty", meaning that it might be correct, but it doesn't feel like I'm looking correct in my own mind. So just looking in the mirror I could see if I was doing it correctly. The second segment I got was with the spin hook kick. Ah, so THAT'S where it goes. I found that if I used a little speed to get around, like a little bit of momentum to make the spin, I could make it around without a problem. The issue was that I knew it was not "pretty". It felt off. I know I was generally executing it correctly, but I'm sure that it could look a lot better. So, I spent a lot of time just working on that hand bit with the upset ridge hand/spear hand thing, and that spin hook kick. (No, I did not get dizzy. It's all about spotting, and I used to have to do 3-5 spins in ballet pirouettes nonstop when I was a kid, so this is nothing!) I didn't work on weapons, just so I could get through these next two sections that I was given. It's not too bad. I'll have to check to see how far along in the form I am, but I think I'm making decent progress, at least for the first day.

So, I have my work cut out for me in the next two weeks. I need to work on streamlining the sequencing of moves so that it's smooth, as well as just get the moves down and make them look good! As I said to ES, as she was doing her upset ridgehand one way, and SW was doing it another (and you go by the way SW does it, as she's the instructor), but I want to get as many of the nuances down now, since this is the form I'll be competing with for the next couple of years. If I learn them the right way now, it'll be easier for me later.

MG was feeling a little flabbergasted about watching what I was doing, and thinking that she couldn't get there. As I explained to her, it took 2 years of classes and lots and lots and lots of practice to get where I am now. Some of the drills we did I could have done quickly, but they would've been sloppy. I usually take my time because I want to get it right and look good. Speed comes later. Accuracy is more important, and so doing axe kicks (another drill that we all did today) comes more easily simply because there were nights last year where even though I wasn't required to do them yet, it was part of some leadership classes, and I was drilled, and drilled and drilled until I was ready to collapse, but now they are pretty easy for me to do as a result. So it's just a matter of time and practice. I just hope that some more of this will start to click for her soon. There is no set timeline to get your black belt, but with plenty of good instruction and lots of practice, and no rushing how you practice, it will all come together. Hopefully she saw that my patience and willingness to help her and not make her feel pressured will help her succeed.

So, now I'm done taking a quick break...off to figure out dinner, and then it'll be another baking marathon tonight!

First of a long line of midterms, and a new belt

2007-12-12T23:27:00.000-05:00

Tonight was graduation/testing night. Both Drew and I tested. It was a bigger deal for Drew than it was for me, because he was going for a new belt, and I wasn't. Y'see, now that I'm a black belt, I have about 12 testing cycles to go through before I'm eligible, provided that I don't take a big break, before I test for my second degree belt. There are 10 midterms, of which 2 are big ones where you go for the points you need to promote, your "bootleg" test to 2BR (second recommended), and then your final rank test. Of those 10 midterms, I was doing Midterm #1.

Anyway, it was a more important night for Drew. He was bumping up from full camo belt to half-camo, half-green. (Next belt, as you guessed, is full green.) But before the graduation, which was a pretty small group compared to usual, Drew had a slight run-in with another kid. All the kids were on the back floor, "practicing" with their weapons (meaning some were legitimately practicing, some were half practicing, and some were just goofing off). Drew falls in the category between half-practicing and not exactly practicing. Anyway, I wasn't watching, as I was getting myself prepared to do some knitting while I watched everything, and this dad comes up to me and lets me know that Drew hurt his kid. Oh great. The kid was holding his mouth. Supposedly, Drew was chasing the kid and hit him with his SJB. Now for those of you not in the know, EVERYONE in the school uses the super padded foam weapons. Even so, if you get whacked with one of those things, even in doing to yourself by accident when practicing, it hurts! Drew told me one story, and the story the dad told me wasn't implausible, but I can't believe Drew was 100% at fault. A lot of the kids were not behaving like angels there. Too many people just don't understand that Drew is the littlest one there, and doesn't always have the maturity that the other kids have, even if he looks at least 2 years older than he is. Anyhow, I assured the dad that I would speak to Drew. Drew got upset, but he was willing to apologize to the kid. The problem was that the kid was in the bathroom with his dad. (He got hit in the mouth, and cut his lip.) Drew is NOT a malicious kid. Immature, impulsive-- absolutely. Malicious- never. Of course, at that moment, that's when SW told the kids to line up. When the kid came out a few minutes later, I apologized to him for Drew, and assured him that Drew did try to apologize because he didn't mean to hurt him, and he would try to say sorry to him later. Drew told me later that he did try to say something to the kid several times, but the kid would ignore him or he didn't hear him. I assured Drew that as long as he didn't mean it, and he did try to apologize, then that was fine, but he wasn't going to play with his SJB that way EVER AGAIN.

Anyway, other than that, he had a good night. It was probably the first testing that I've seen him with the most poise-- for him. When he was called up to do his form, being that he's still a Tiny Tiger, he only has to do half, and with an instructor. He was the only one called up. So, except for an instructor, he had to be up there all by himself. And that being said, it proved that he was the youngest one there, as only TTs do it the way he had to do it. Anyway, it wasn't perfect, but he did a really good job. His movements have a certain crispness to them, even if they are not exactly the right moves, if that makes sense. He had good jumps, he has the "pop" in his punches and other hand movements and kicks. He did great. Then, he had to wait until later to do his weapons. After the earlier incident, he originally was going to abandon doing it, but he changed his mind. He had a hard time keeping it still while he was waiting, but then again, remember, he's ADHD- he's hard to keep still, period! But once he was able to get up and do his weapon, he was back on track, and he felt good, and he was trying to do some tricks. It was cute. When he had to do the sparring, I was a little fearful, as he was paired with JV, the little boy who kicked Drew in the head several weeks earlier. Before he went out to the floor to spar, I reminded him that graduation sparring is "no contact", which meant no touching, so he needed to work on doing that. So off they went! I was surprised to see that Drew did maintain his control, and was doing well. Then, JV kicked Drew in the head again. It was more like a tap this time, so he was doing his best to keep his control too (he's a lot taller than Drew). Of course, Drew protested, or at least very loudly alerted the judges there, "Hey, NO CONTACT!" :-) But he was fine, and he did well. And that was that. He was very proud, in the end, that he got his new belt, and that he got another silver star for his uniform.

Here's the boy with his new belt now!

Another fierce face!

I don't know why he feels that he has to look so tough and fierce when he is taking a TKD photo. Maybe he thinks that he seems more powerful if he does that. I dunno. It's not something I encourage. He actually did have a smile on his face, and he was very proud of his achievements.

As for myself, there's not much to say. I had to do half of my form, half of my weapons form, and spar. I did my form with another 1st degree, but it was a kid I'm guessing was no more than 8 or 9 years old, and he was speeding through. I didn't care. I was going to take my time. I did have to ask some of the teen instructors where the kihaps were, because I never learned where they were (after the 2nd set of punches, and after the knifehand strike near the end of that half), and I was able to get them in at the right time. I went commando with the knee braces (horrors!), but I did fine, because I hadn't overdone it. My weapons form was also done at MY pace, not some kid's pace, and as a result, I know it was done right. I know he didn't do his V-strike correctly, and I made a point to do mine correctly, because SW had made it a point to demonstrate the correct way of doing it. Oh well. In sparring, I went up against ES again, like last time. She kept me moving, but it's never that exciting to go up against her. I did kick her in the head, by accident. I was trying to clear her head with my foot, and well, I missed. Oops. I didn't hit her hard. But then I heard Drew's words come from ES-- "Hey, no contact!" ;-) She knew that I had better control, of course, and I explained that I wasn't meaning to hit her head, that my aim was bad, and I didn't stretch as much as I thought I was able to do. No biggie. So, it was all said and done. It was probably one of the easiest testings I've ever done. Perhaps it's because I didn't feel the pressure of the last few. So, it was a fairly pleasant evening.

I think for Drew, who I'm much more concerned about his progress right now, he really does enjoy TKD. I think he's just an overly sensitive kid, due to all his learning disabilities, and so the littlest thing can set him off, and then he'll say he hates TKD. But when he's in there, he loves it, and that's all he does when he plays at home. So I know deep down he does like it. But he's still little, and it will take him time to get to the point where he has true "black belt" poise.

At bedtime tonight, Drew told me that another kid whose name he didn't know thought that Drew was in Leadership, when he knows he's only in Masters. We talked about it a little bit, and he understands-- and agrees-- that he's not ready for Leadership yet. But he's definitely got a lot of the right raw materials for it. Give him until next school year, or when he gets his black belt, or when he turns 8-- whichever seems right at the time-- and then we'll talk. I know it's a long climb, but he's going to be a great martial artist someday. I feel it in my creaky old bones. He made me proud tonight.

Joyful night

2007-12-06T21:47:00.000-05:00

Two entries in one day...can you stand it? ;-)

Last night before we left Instructor class, EL asked me if I could come to her second attempt at getting her 3rd degree belt. She said that pretty much no one else could make it, and it would mean a lot if I could come. Usually Thursdays are relatively free days for me, so I told her that I couldn't make any promises, but I would certainly try. EL had to test at KC's school, as SW is not a high enough rank herself to be able to pass EL to the next rank.

I did make the attempt, and I got there after things got started, but she was one of the last to go, so I didn't miss anything. It was just me, her parents, and one of her dad's cousins who came the last time as well. She did her form fine, and she said she missed a section of her weapons form. Oh well. I guess they didn't notice, since KC has about a million people out on the floor at the same time. I mean, SW does too, but it's more like a half million vs. a million. The one thing I noticed about the students at KC's school is that they do their forms a little differently, and well, I think the students at our school have more snap to what they do, in general. Anyway, then EL did her sparring. She was in her chair, and KC matched her up with a very tall teenager. Well, as we joked after she was done, it was a good thing she sparred with me yesterday, as that kid was at least as big as me, so she got some good "long legs" practice! LOL

Then the big moment-- board breaking. No pun intended, but this is literally what makes or breaks it if you pass or not. The one thing both EL and I were noticing with the other students was that almost nobody was aiming for the centers of the board. There was a lot of plastic being used (plastic boards, that is), and the set ups that the kids were doing were just whacked out. They made no sense. Just their whole methodology just looked like almost none of them had done that many breaks, or had practiced all that much. It wasn't where if they didn't get the break on the 1st try that they just had tweak boards-- they would majorly move them! The holders were also not good, because if a break wasn't done, they wouldn't just hold the board where it was. The more it's kept still from where the person places it, from my own experience on both sides of the board (holding and kicking), the more success the person will have if the board is already set up correctly, and less injuries too.

Well, EL's turn came up. I reminded her before she went up about the placement of her second board, as she made a mistake with it last night, and also told her from watching all these other people trying to break boards, very few were doing it, but she could definitely pound it out. I also suggested that she punch the hell out of those things, even if it meant breaking her wrist. She agreed, in jest! ;-) So, she set up her boards, and man, I don't think her board holders were the best, but she was setting it up fine, at least, as long as they held it where she put it! She bowed in, and made her first attempt at each board. A "thunk" was heard on each board. So she set up the boards again while KC watched another kid make an attempt. One thing I don't like about this scenario at KC's testings is that she makes each kid wait for so long between attempts, that it really gives the person testing enough time to psyche themselves out. I was afraid of that happening with EL. When it was EL's turn again, I just did my best to send her a karmic/psychic message across the room of, "Don't think about it, just GO!". While I don't know if she heard me or not, WHAM! went the first board. There was applause. But then, there was the break with which she was having the most difficulty in practices. Deep breath....WHAM!!! As soon as she broke that second board, I jumped to my feet punching the air with a big, "YEAH!!!!!!!!" and of course, she got general applause for breaking. Well, I couldn't contain my excitement, naturally. I know how bummed she was when she didn't break at her last testing, and she's worked so hard for this testing that it was a joyful relief that she did it. Changing over from her chair to her walker really made a huge difference, and fortunately she figured that one out.

I could stay long afterwards, but I had to get a photo with my cell phone of the happy new 3rd degree black belt. And this is only a half smile for the night! ;-) She even asked her mom afterwards, "Can I squee now?" because she is that happy and excited, and for good reason. She really earned this one. EL is admirable just in the fact that all her limbs don't work the same as the average person, so she has to work that much harder right off the bat to do the forms and everything else. But she loves this sport, and she's not a World Champion for nothing! She puts every ounce of her soul into what she does when she does TKD, and it shows. And she's a good example for persevering when the chips are down. She could have let her difficulties from the last testing get her down and psyche her out. She didn't let that happen. She was much calmer this time around, and she did much better, with a very positive outcome.

So congrats to the newest 3rd degree black belt at my do-jahng! :-)

EL-- showing only about HALF of her happiness and pride of her accomplishment!

Another fun filled Wednesday

2007-12-06T11:19:00.000-05:00

I was pretty wiped out, as usual, from a long Wednesday. Morning class was alright. It's not quite as fun since Sandy's not there. She's out of commission for a while, doctor's orders, because her ankle is THAT messed up. She has to go to PT, but other than that, she is supposed to keep off it as much as possible. At least the timing is good, because December is usually a pretty dead month once graduation is done. It feels a little odd, even though it's a small class, that I'm now one of the high ranks as a black belt now. It's amazing how the change of status really does change things, even if it's a little bit. We have two new moms who have joined the morning class. One started last week, and one started this week. At least they have partners to move along together. I had nobody until Sandy came along!

Drew is holding in there. SW and I had a conversation about the day before, and she assured me, as I suspected, that his crying jag with the board breaking was just a 6 year old thing. I figured as much. She said he was still following everyone in the class when doing the form, but once she made some small adjustment comments to the class (without singling him out, although others were doing it too), he was keeping up pretty well, she felt. Sparring is still an issue, which reared its ugly head in Wednesday's class. He was doing well until sparring. He was paired up with another boy who's about 8 named CG. CG is big for his age as well, and well, a little more gawky with his movements, and he doesn't seem very mature for his age. Well, both of them were kicking each other's shins rather than getting in the higher kicks, and NK separated them and reminded them of the rules. They went at it again, including face punches. She reminds them again. Next time they are getting into it, they are evidentally mad at each other and wrestling! Grrr. So, she separated them, and told them both to take off their gear because they were done, especially since they couldn't play by the rules. Simple enough. Well, it got Drew into a crying jag where he couldn't stop (he could've been tired too), and by that time, my class had started, but JC was there. I knew he could handle whatever was the problem. I saw later that the kids were bowing out, but no Drew. I think JC just did what he had to do, and got Drew out of there. Sometimes that's the best thing to do, and after I heard the whole story, it was the best thing to do to get Drew out of there. Drew is not a violent kid, mind you, he really isn't. But, he's just 6 1/2, and still figuring out the solidness of his body, and controlling it and such. There are a couple kids like that, so he's not the only one. He just ends up going up against those kids. He was fine, but he just has to learn better control-- of his body, and his temper. He's still a work in progress.

My regular class in the evening was fine. Some of the drills that we've been doing in the last two weeks have been very intensive on the knees, and that hasn't helped. It's gotten to a point for the last two weeks that my *good* knee is starting to have problems. That's not good at all. Geez. Just what I need. So, I don't do any jumping, and I think I have to really watch it with some of the sparring drills we've been doing, because a lot of them have been lunge and duck-and-weave type drills and they are killer to my knees. Oh well. I am pretty sure I have my half-form down for both regular form and weapons, as it's just a matter of continuing to practice. I don't need to break any boards this time around, but I did do a front kick break with my opposite (read: left) foot, to try it out, and it was a no-brainer. I also had some decent sparring rounds, although I was totally exhausted. The best round was with Dr. P, who's just a lot of fun to hang out with, and a very good martial artist. He's one of those few who never went into leadership, yet is approaching his 3rd degree soon. He's very good. He's about my age, and we were sharing old geezer aches, and he didn't realize that I'm a big kicker, and usually go for the ribs and head in combos. (I don't think I've sparred him too often, and it's been a while.) So we had a pretty decent bout, to say the least. He got some good punches in, and he said I did pretty well, all things considered. It was good.

Instructor class was mostly about talking about how to deal with situations much like what happened with Drew. I volunteered the information about Drew, because I'm the first to admit, unlike most parents, that he can be a problem kid sometimes. SW had mentioned another ADHD kid, and things that we had to change in attitude that had been working for Drew to apply to this other kid, as well as other children who try to get out of doing their work in class or behaving. In that respect, I think people are glad that I'm not in denial about my kid, and they know it's okay if he's disciplined another way. They all know that Drew is not a bad kid, but one who doesn't know how to control his actions very well, and that's part of the reason he's there. So, the kids in the class were asking, so, if a kid does this, how do you handle that? What are the options? Being the only parent in the group (as well as adult), I could give them both the parent perspective AND the ATA perspective, and how they really do work together. So that was a good class too, not too stressful on the knees!

Graduation is next week. I think Drew and I will be fine. Just have to practice between now and then. ;-)

Trying out Tuesdays

2007-12-04T23:27:00.000-05:00

Since our Tuesdays have been freeing up, and Drew had..."issues"...with RA (I don't understand his problem with RA completely, but whatever), I decided that we'd try out Tuesday classes instead, just to see if it worked out differently. SW had told me that it was typically a smaller class than the Monday and Wednesday classes, so it was worth a try so that way she could keep a closer eye on him...and no RA. (He doesn't work on Tuesdays.)

Sure enough, it was a smaller class. Compared to last Wednesday's class of about 20-24 kids, today was only about 9 kids. MUCH BETTER. One of the things that SW was getting after the kids about was "happy feet" (think of the movie with the penguin, where he couldn't keep his feet still for very long). She said she was not singling anyone out, but I know one of the main culprits was Drew. He's always wiggling around. He's gotten better over the years, but there's still plenty of room for improvement. I think what I most liked seeing today was that he was able to keep up with the older kids and higher belts today. He still travelled a little too much-- some of that "happy feet" at work, but it wasn't as bad as usual. I was just glad that he was keeping up for the full form as much as he was. I suspect that he won't do the whole form, and he'll still only do half (which means with help) at testing next week, but oh well. I think he MIGHT be capable of doing it, but then again, maybe he's not quite mature enough for it yet. Hard to say. I'll let SW make the call this time. During weapons, well, at least he didn't hit anyone with his SJB! SW had them working on 20 second freestyles. It's funny to watch the kids, because some use a "form" that SW sometimes teaches. Drew has always wanted to do his own thing, and some of the moves are still a little hard for him. I think he improvises pretty well, otherwise. But in his last improvisation, he did about 5-6 V-strike moves in a row-- FAST -- and it looked like it would hurt! But he was fine and proud of his achievement. It just made me laugh to watch it.

Things started to fall apart at board breaking. This is a year of new experiences, that's for sure. And it's a time for learning things the hard way, and learning how to mature. In board breaking, he decided to work on his roundkick break again. It just wasn't happening. He'd kick and kick, and JZ tried to help him figure out the problem, but it just wasn't happening. He walked away and came over to me (who had his gear bag) crying. He was upset and disappointed in himself, and frustrated. I told him after everyone else had a try, maybe he could asked SW or JZ to try again. He still wasn't hitting the mark. This upset him more. I, first, had to get him to calm down, because he was getting hysterical. Once I got him calmed a little more, I pointed out another boy in his class who was a black belt who wasn't getting his board broken today either. I explained that I don't break the board often too, he just doesn't see it because he isn't in class with me, but he could ask SV (who was there next to me, as her son is in Drew's class) or Ma'am, and they could tell him that it happens, and sometimes we have off days, and it's just like a game. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. I got him in his sparring gear, and he didn't seem too bad after that. He was a little grumpy when they had to bow out, but I didn't rush him out the door. I just gave him some hugs and assurances, and as he's telling me that he doesn't want to take TKD anymore, I reminded him that graduation is next week and he gets a new belt. (He often gets tournaments and graduation mixed up. As long as he gets something, he's happy.) Once I said that, he perked up a bit, and agreed to at least go through next week. He'll be fine. He was fine until the board break failure. If he had broken the board tonight, he would've been fine. There would be no issue.

I'm thinking after graduation, since we only have a week before having a week-long winter break at the TKD school, I'm going to give him that week before off too. Unless he WANTS to go, of course. But I think he needs another break. He needs to enjoy Christmas and be a kid with a few less things to worry about, like learning his form. If I can give him these mini breaks like this, I think it's less stress on him, and he will still learn. As we are often reminded, there is no timetable in getting your black belt, and Drew is certainly proof of that. I want him to feel success, even if he has to feel defeat first, like today's board breaking exercise, along the way.

It ain't pretty, but it's not expected to be yet

2007-11-29T19:48:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was all about getting back into the swing of things after taking a week (or two) off from classes. It was a little hard, not because I was still recovering from Thanksgiving dinner still, but rather just getting into the swing of things, and both my knees were acting up. I had braces on BOTH knees, and eventually, that didn't help much.

The morning class was rather...dry. We were all cracking our old bones in there from non-use for the last week or so. One missing player was Sandy. Man, I really missed her in there. As I think I've mentioned before, she and I seem to operate in class similarly, insofar as we are not afraid to really kick or hit with some force, and be able to take that force too. I think that's why we are often paired up with each other, as well as pretty much being the same rank as well (I think she's a half cycle ahead of me in most cases these days.) Anyway, I worked with SH yesterday, who I know got her 1BD before either Sandy or I, yet she seems to take her sweet time in getting from rank to rank, midterm to midterm. She is a tiny, petite, skinny woman who is about my age, but I am about twice her weight and at least a foot taller than her. When we did drills together, I told her not to be afraid of really putting some OOMPH into her punches and kicks on the pads I was holding, and well, her OOMPH wasn't too OOMPHy. Like many of the women in class, it was rather passive. You could still get a workout just moving about, but I'm so used to Sandy, and being able to put more muscle into it. I felt like I couldn't put as much force into my hit because I might hurt SH! Oh well.

So SH and I worked on the form next. She is working on the same midterm as I am, namely the first, and she's thinking of skipping this testing. We got the rest of the first half yesterday, and it wasn't so bad, but somehow she felt she couldn't memorize it in two weeks. I dunno. I think I can memorize it easily enough, but I know it's not going to be pretty. I know there are glitches in how I do it, and how well I do it. There is a jump hook kick which I can do, but again, I'm sure it doesn't look good. There's one spot where I didn't know there was a positioning step before going to do a section on the other side (you do a bunch of steps on one side, then the other side), and I know I'm still not getting that right. But it's a minor thing for now. SW said not to worry about it too much right now, as there's plenty of time to tweak things. For once, I'm listening. I usually work fairly hard to make what I've learned so far to be as close to flawless as I possibly can, but this time, since this will be the same form I'll be doing for the next two years or so, I'm not too worried about it. It's just the first half that I need to know at this point, and that's fine.

Drew skipped Monday's class. I agreed to it because I think he has issues with RA, and so do I. The last time he was in class with RA, RA was disciplining him, and said for Drew either to get back in line, or he could leave. That was a big mistake. First, you never give Drew the option of leaving because second, Drew will always take that option to leave. SW knows better, and she told me that herself, that you can't give Drew that option, because she realized that herself. He doesn't give her as many problems because he knows that he can't pull that with her. She'll yell at him all she wants until he complies. But she'll never give him an out. A timeout, perhaps, but not an out from class. Anyway, he seemed to do okay overall yesterday. During his class, she had me help for a little bit, as there was something like 20 kids in his class! And she had three different forms to work on, so after she got the majority of them set up with me, then she could take care of the other kids. All I had to do was make sure that each kid who was assigned a segment, remembered to lead the class in their segment. I didn't have to know the form (I couldn't remember it, since it had been quite a while since I had done Songahm #4), but all I had to do was make sure the kids kept up, didn't cause trouble, keep them in line, make corrections when needed, etc. Hey, it was good instruction training, and I was used as the example at instructor class later. I missed Drew's sparring, as usual, but from an earlier conversation I had with SW, she feels that he's got a lot of power, which is good, but he needs to learn to control it better. She also feels that he's at an age where some movements are still kind of clumsy/gangly because of his age, so she's not worried about his finesse quite yet. Since he's very big for his age (there are kids 3 years older than him in the class, and he's still bigger than them!), she said some of it what comes with the territory of being big for his age and being younger than everyone else that size. Oh well.

The other two classes I took were fine overall. No big whoop. I worked with a 2nd degree teen whom I'll call BB, and he's a little mousy, and not in leadership (most people who are black belts are leadership, but there are still some few that remain in Masters Club), but he's nice enough. Even in my decrepit state, he and I could get our drills done quickly and efficiently, and I could keep up with him, or at least he was being patient with me, perhaps! At least he could pack some OOMPH into his kicks in the drills, so it was nice to be able to work with someone who could handle that. I spent most of the time working on my form, although I have to say, that even with two knee braces on, doing the jump kicks that I have to do in this form thusfar were already starting to take a toll on my knees. Not good. I can only imagine how my knees would have felt today if I hadn't been wearing my braces. (I probably wouldn't be walking today, even though they are still a little achy.) Black Belt Mama has been talking over the past few weeks about how she's doing all this PT so she can avoid surgery. Me, I WANT surgery. I've been plagued with this for years. It isn't as bad as it was a year ago, which was post-accident, but I feel this is something that's been going on for about 10 years now, and even with PT, it never gets 100% better, or even 90% better. After PT, I just had killer quads, but my knee still hurt, and my PT yelled at me for not telling him. Well, he didn't ask! I just did what I was told to do at my sessions. So I wish someone would just fix this, let me to post-operative PT, and get back to where I was a long time ago. I wouldn't be surprised if knee replacement surgery is in my future at some point. Anyhow, I digress. Since my knees were starting to smart from the jumping (oh, and I didn't mention that we had to do all these deep knee lunges in the morning too, did I?), I just would mark the jumps as best as I could. It was hard, because I'd look so lame not doing them, but I have to do what I have to do to preserve my ability to still walk when I can! We didn't do sparring (YAY!), but we did weapons and board breaks. In weapons, JZ told me that I was not doing my handover in the lasso right when I swing it around my neck. I've been doing it that was since time began and no one has ever corrected me! I'm also thinking that for me, my arms were just out of shape and practice from doing it, so that's why I was goofing up. I just have to put the time in again to work on that blasted SJB form. I really am not a big fan of the SJB (numchakas), can you tell? I did watch JZ show MP what the whole 2nd degree SN/kama form looked like, and OH, it is such a beautiful sight to see. Not only because JZ does it well, but I LOVE kamas. I think they are my favorite weapon. And I don't get to use them anymore except if I want to do XMA, so I have to continue to think about that, and learn some more moves from JZ! ;-) Board breaking wasn't bad. I did a knifehand, but it took a few tries because I hadn't done it in a while, but I got it. SW kept holding the board at an angle I'm not used to doing, but whatever. She's the boss.

Instructor class was okay. It was BU and I (the only adults doing this part) and most of the teens working on teaching method stuff, of which I did the actual thing earlier that evening (see the part with Drew's class above). It was just something where the instructor would tell you what order the kids knew the sequence, and you wouldn't have to know the form yourself, and just keep the students going. Well, we used the current set of one-steps to work on this, and we would switch up teens to lead or do student segments. Half the time it was where BU and I had to keep the teens in line, even though we didn't have to lead the group. Part of the problem is some kids are mousier than others, so they need to step it up a notch to have their presence be known, whether it be as an instructor trainee, or just as a student! Even I was reminding the little ones that when they would say what their segment was, they had to say it loud and clear for everyone to hear, because if anyone was forgetting that part of the form, they just had to listen-- provided that segment person was speaking up! Some of the teens also get rowdy, and let me tell you, if I had had another turn being "leader", I would have had them do about 25 pushups for not focusing on what they are supposed to be doing. One of them is a 3rd degree, and he couldn't even be bothered to know the names of his classmates in this class. He'd just snap his fingers, when the assignment was to say who'd come next. I told him to at least say Ma'am or Sir if he didn't know their name, but it was pretty shameful that people who are in his TKD classes were people that he couldn't be bothered to learn their names. And he wants to be an instructor? I didn't know all the names of the little kids earlier, but at least SW wrote them down for me, and after one round of doing the form, I knew who was who! Pretty pitiful.

I was glad to be done at the end, because I don't think my knees could take any more for the night without it getting ugly. But, the good news in all of this is that a)I've got all the parts of my half-form now, so all I need to do is practice it so I at least have the sequence down, and b)as an adult, it's good to know that I know how to command a class and discipline when I need to. The kids in Drew's class seemed to really listen and pay attention when I would talk to them and remind them of what they needed to do. I know I'm famous for being goofy and silly in class myself, but at the same time, when there's work to be done, it still gets done.

So, I think I need to watch the DVD of my form. I'll have to see if there's a YouTube version of it somewhere so you can see it, for those of you who are not ATA'ers. It's different in that where I was used to doing all arm movements in doubles (using both hands), now I'm learning single handed loads and punches, and it's HARD to readjust. Being a newbie black belt really is so much like being a white belt all over again. I've said it before, but it still feels that way right now.

Is my subconscious trying to tell me something?

2007-11-25T18:55:00.000-05:00

Well, after I got the opportunity to take the week off from work, and I was giving Drew a week's break, I decided I need a break too. Just for the week. Besides, I'm not in that much of a rush with getting my next belt, so if I'm not ready this cycle, I'm not ready. No biggie.

So imagine my surprise this morning as I'm trying to sleep in on a Sunday morning, the day before the craziness of life ensuing again, that I have a dream about TKD. I was back in the do-jahng, and it looked like it was being remodelled or something, but just mildly. It was a weekday daytime class, and for some reason, there was a class for the aikido people or some other group in the back. Usually we have the whole place to ourselves. Again, no biggie, things change. Somehow, the walls were covered with these huge dropcloth like curtains, with the red and blue stripes we currently have on the wall. So it's almost like they are doing the remodelling due to the dropcloth curtains, but at the same time the curtains are decorative in an attempt to make the place still look presentable during repairs. What really got me about it was that there are mirrors in the front set of mats, but not in the back, and the curtains covered up the mirrors. I've worked without mirrors plenty of times before, so that in and of itself didn't bother me, but somehow this bothered me. Then, the other class left, and I could go practice my poom-sae (kata) on the back mats. Somehow, the curtains back there didn't have the stripes, and suddenly, I felt like I was in this all white box with no windows or doors or sense of what was up or down or whatever. It was really disconcerting to not know how close or far away the walls were. I haven't quite learned half my form yet, but having been away, the dream continued where I would practice what I did know already. For some reason, perhaps being in this weird mat/room, I would be struggling with this one load. I was able to do my form, but for some reason the load into a double outer forearm block was proving difficult, and somehow I knew it wasn't as difficult as it was in trying. It was as if my limbs were made of lead, and I just couldn't cross my hands the right way every time, or I'd constantly be getting confused. It was weird.

I woke up at that point, happy to see I wasn't in this mind boggling room, and knowing that while it'll be a little bit of a push to get the ol'brain back into gear to remember my form when I take my next class, I remember a lot more than my dream was purporting.

I wonder what it all means?

Putting things in perspective

2007-11-15T16:37:00.000-05:00

You know, I have a few TKD people around me who are too smart for my own good. But thankfully, I have them around to put me in my place, or help me see what really matters.

Yesterday was the usual whirlwind of three classes for the day, plus Drew's class. Drew's classes have been okay for the most part. There's not a lot to report, other than he was asked to leave class for the first time for this year on Monday. I think RA needs to figure out how to get Drew to participate, and not give him the option of "participate or you can go", because Drew will always go. I wasn't happy with him, but he did make a choice. And maybe it was better that we left when we did, rather than have him rebel and meltdown for the rest of class. He was proud of his new roundkick break that he has now, however. ;-)

For me, I was reviewing and learning more for Shim Jun. What I have down isn't too pretty looking at all, but heck, I've only been doing it a couple weeks, after all. And I have to remember that I only have to have the first half for December, and I have, what, a total of 2 years to perfect it once I have the whole thing? So, I'm just trying to make sure that I have the sequence of moves down before I tweak them, and make them look more presentable than they are now. Maybe it's because I've been getting over this sinus infection thingy, but I'm just very tired and worn. I think I might have also pulled something in my good knee in the morning exercises, which doesn't help. So, during the evening classes, yes, I am now up to TWO knee braces, one for each knee. The bad knee still gets the heavy duty one, but the good knee is now needing support as well. Woe is me who is falling apart at the knees! I got through it though. Had a good sparring session, even though I was pretty winded by the end. There's nothing like having to spar two teenage boys who are 3rd degrees and old enough to be your teenage children when you are an old, newly christened 1st degree like myself. I got a few good hits in, so that was good.

I also tried a new board break. Well, it was new in the sense of me doing it on a different side and trying it. One of the board break choices for 1st degrees is doing a front, side and roundkick combination. Sounds easy enough, but the catch is that one of the kicks can't be on your "dominant" side. So, while all through your color belt training, you may have only used one foot for all your foot breaks, at this level, at least one has to be with the opposite foot. I know, I hear you. You already know that I have an opposite break, that left footed roundkick, so the rest is easy peasy. Well, this is true. However, when I would try to figure out the best way to do the break to incorporate that left foot, it just seemed easier if I did a second kick with the left as well. After all, I should be able to do that as a 1st degree now anyway. So, since I still have a lot of time before I have a required break at testing, I figured I'd start playing with some new foot breaks. Last night, I tried a sidekick with my left foot for the first time. And I'm happy to report that it broke on the first try. Go me! :-) Yup, one practice try, and right into an actual break. I was happy about that.

But I think the best part of the night was the conversation I had with NK. Now, for those of you who don't know, NK is one of SW's teen instructors, one of the highest ranked instructors in our school, and a very accomplished competitor. She's ranked in the Top Ten for her rank and age in the WORLD. She also has held several state championships over time. So, you could say she's been around the TKD block a bit. She asked me how the tournament went, and I recounted my story. When she asked who the 2nd degree in my ring was, she was familiar with the woman, and basically said that it was totally unfair for that woman to be in the ring, as a)she had twice as much experience than almost anyone in that ring, and b) she was an instructor at HER school, and practiced and taught every single day, and was in Top Ten, or something like that as well. Man, I was competing against THAT? That definitely put it in perspective. Now, Sandy had also told me about some of these other ladies, as she's one to check out the competition more closely. Sandy pointed out that we were the greenest black belts of our ring, and upon further thought, I really was the newest black belt there. I didn't have a prayer, really! And while NK was saying much of the same things of putting it in perspective as Sandy did, I think she understood on a different level, because she IS competitive like me. NK is not going to go to a tournament unless she thinks she has a chance at placing. And she said that the big "A" tournament last spring was the first time that she hadn't placed in anything for the first time, so she knew how I felt completely. I don't think that it was a matter than Sandy didn't appreciate how I felt, because she did. But I think NK appreciated it more having been in the same circumstance, and looking at it initially the same way, if that makes sense. I felt a little more encouraged, too, because even though NK is young enough to be my daughter, she is still my instructor, and she understands my limits as well as my capabilites better than most people, and how to get there as well. So when one of the World Top Ten tells you about not placing last year in a big local tournament and it being the first time she didn't place at all? Yeah, she understands that feeling of defeat very well.

I'm still debating whether to go in on Saturday just for the early morning forms class. I might go just because that's where I need the most practice. But I'm where I need to be, more or less, in the form. I'll think about it. There aren't any other local tournaments (other than an Interschool that I probably won't be able to go to due to Cub Scouts in December) until at least February or March, so I have time. And maybe I won't do well in that one either, but at least I'll know what the competition is like, and I'll have more time to practice.

All a-buzz

2007-11-12T19:09:00.000-05:00

John V always has a very insightful way of looking at all things martial arts. I admire his way of being very practical when it comes to how martial arts-- any discipline-- should be approached and how certain lessons can apply to "real" life.

So, I was rather amused, and educated as usual, with his most recent entry, Got Energy?. The last paragraph is the kicker (no pun intended). A must read! :-) It picked my spirits up, that's for sure.

WORST TOURNAMENT EVER

2007-11-10T14:36:00.000-05:00

I knew I shouldn't have gone. I knew deep down I wasn't going to be prepared, and that I could be an adult about it, and went in with the attitude of knowing I wasn't going to place most likely. Yeah, it all sounds good enough. But it was terrible.

Now, please note, I am NOT a morning person. And I had to get up earlier than I normally do even to get Drew ready for school. I had to leave at the time I normally have to get up! So, I dragged myself out of bed, and got out on time, only grabbing an instant breakfast drink for breakfast upon running out the door. I got there (and got a decent parking spot) about 5 minutes before there was the Black Belt meeting, which was the whole reason that we were there that early. However, most of it was directed to those who were certified to judge, and neither Sandy or I are certified to judge. But it's good to know what the judges had to be reminded of, even though most of it was stuff that I knew already. So after that was dismissed, they lined us up immediately, and we got our group assignment. There were 5 women who were 30-something 1st degrees, and 1 woman in the same age who was in the 2nd degree with no other competitors her age, so she was put with us. So we had a total of 6. Sandy and I went to hang out with our some of our tourney friends from NY state, and I knit a little. We then had to sit through the Opening Ceremonies. This is pure torture, really. It's all this brouhaha where, especially since the Grandmaster was making an appearance, we had to sit on the cold, hard floor with no back support, and listen to this person and that person being honored, and the Grandmaster getting gifts from Korea (I would think that this guy makes enough money and goes to enough of these things to be able to get his own nice stuff, and goes to Korea enough to not need to get gifts FROM Korea, DUH), but then they almost forgot this demo team demonstration which was decent. It just took FOREVER. Since after the long ceremony that was dragged out was too long, especially for the number of people there (or not there, as the case would be), we were assigned to our ring, and we lined up.

Well, let's see if I could give a summary. In forms - there was initially a tie for 1st, and a three-way tie for 3rd. Well, I was in the 3-way tie for third, and I felt like I had really done the best performance of CJ#2 I'd ever done, considering I was very tired after doing the first performance. Sandy was also in that group. Neither of us were third. Weapons, for me, was a total disaster. While I knew my form, there was another ring of guys next to us that were sparring and well, it was distracting. Between that and nerves, I just messed up left and right. When the judges gave the scores for me, I actually thanked them for their kindness, because I felt that the scores they gave me, which were on the lower end of the midrange, were generous. I would've put my scores on the low end. I guess it was because I, at least, knew where I messed up, and I did tell them I just learned the form a week ago. But it was horrible. I didn't expect to speed through it, and I didn't, but I knew the form cold, and I had been practicing every day. Things I goofed up on were the parts that I could do with ease. I did significantly better in my living room than I did there. It was the worst weapons showing I'd ever done, and I've never not ranked in weapons before. Lastly was sparring. I didn't think I'd get through that either, but since I had done badly in the first two events, I thought, okay, I still have a shot. I thought that more when I was paired up with this woman who was barely 5 feet tall. Cool, the head kicks should get her. Sure enough (and even she said she didn't know how she did it), she got at least one kick in the head to ME, and she won that match, eventually placing 3rd.

Okay, so in the end, Sandy and I didn't place in anything in traditional. She had won 1st in XMA the night before, so she had something. So as all the awards are handed out, she and I were the only ones not to place at this ring. But then it happened. They had one more award, namely a Spirit award. She and I, I felt, had been cheering and yelling and being supportive as anyone. Remember, there were only 6 people in the whole ring. She had already gotten an award the night before, not that the judges would've known that. But who got the Spirit award? If you guessed Sandy, you would be correct. So everyone in that ring-- except me-- got some sort of award or acknowledgement. Just thinking about it is getting me upset again.

I've never attended a tournament where I didn't think I'd place, even if it was 3rd. I will not deny that those who did place high didn't deserve it-- they were very good, and I felt a little out of my league, but figured that I hadn't gone there to win. But guess what? I DID go to win. Since I didn't place, and I was under no obligation to do any judging, I left. I said my goodbyes to Sandy, but I was so ready to go. I was that upset. I even saw that the table where Grandmaster was sitting was not busy, so I thought for a fleeting second to go get my photo taken with him, just to say I did it. But I had already changed out of my gi jacket into a TKD sweatshirt, and I just felt that I wasn't up to it. I got in the car, and came home, crying just about the whole way home.

Now, you might be thinking, "Hey, you're an adult. You shouldn't be upset like that. You should be a good loser, as you knew what you were getting into. All is fair in a competition like that." But I discovered something about myself. I don't like losing. Or at least not getting any recognition. Of 6 people in my ring, 5 people got some sort of recognition. I did not. If it had been a bigger ring, well, it'd be a matter of misery loves company. I wouldn't be alone in my defeat and lack of recognition. But I spent a freaking $60 just to enter, drive an hour away at an ungodly hour, put my best effort in (okay, weapons didn't work out, but hell, the forms I definitely did), and came out with absolutely nothing. It was SO not worth going. I knew it was a bad idea to go in so fresh off my new belt testing, but no. I had to talk myself into going for the sake of the competition, not for winning. I've always done well in some way, come away with something. This is the first time since I ever started competing that I have come home empty handed. I feel so defeated and worthless right now. Totally worthless. Oh, and then if it weren't for EL, I wouldn't have known that introductory stance would've been wrong, and then I didn't know that if I didn't have my state champion uniform (which I don't have yet, because, you know, that costs a lot of money), I was supposed to bring a copy of the state stats to show that I was a state champion. Like anybody told me that part! NOBODY TOLD ME. That pissed me off, especially since my instructor is the RCT, and she should have told me, and she didn't. She's never told me. It might not have mattered when it came to getting a "bye" in sparring, but it's the principle of the thing.

This has definitely made me question whether it's worth me continuing to compete. I've always gone thinking that I could rank, that I had a shot. Even this time, even if my weapons ended up being a mess (which is was the worst it has ever been), I thought that my form was pretty solid, and I had a decent shot at sparring. But nope. I think I've learned not to enter a competition if I don't think I'm ready. It's a waste of my time and money anyway otherwise. I've also learned that while it might not be adult of me, I am a poor loser. I don't like feeling defeated. I have so many other things working against me, I don't need anything else to be dragging down what little ego I have.

This may have been my last tournament. That's how much the experience soured me. If I'm still crying about it 4 hours after I left the arena, then it's not a good thing.

A little bit of old, a little bit of new

2007-11-07T22:40:00.000-05:00

Part of what's difficult right now, being a newly minted black belt, is that I don't know a whole lot of black belt stuff. And I have a competition on Saturday. So, I need to start learning new information, while still retaining the old information for just a little bit longer.

Morning class was good. As usual, Sandy and I were paired up. We were doing this one set of drills that involved these really long resistance bands. And of course, the two of us being a little too...creative, were teasing each other about figuring out how to do some sort of Bruce Lee/Jackie Chan move to whip that thing around the other and trap them. (Heck, I'm just giggling to myself about it.) We were just being really silly, but still doing out drills too. SW had to tell us to "Focus, children!" Hee hee. What good is class if there's no fun involved now and then? I worked on the weapons form, and got some fine tuning tips, and got the parts of Shim Jun, the new form that I'm learning, reinforced. I still don't feel very confident with it, but I think it's because it's learning new techniques with the one handed stuff that throws me off.

Much of my regular evening class was the same sort of thing. I didn't really work on my weapons form much because I know the whole thing already, so JZ gave me a few more steps of the Shim Jun to do. There's a jump hook kick that lands with a new arm base move that's, well, HARD. Done separately, I could kind of do it, but with hand/foot timing, oh man. Good thing I have a few years to learn and tweak this! I also had a 3rd degree teenage guy land on his butt trying to pull some sort of spin kick on me. Ha! Don't mess with me! (Nah, it was more like, "Don't go too hard on the old lady!") Board breaking was pretty good too. I actually tried breaking with a sidekick. Well, that's not so unusual, as much as I was trying it with my left foot! The sisters held the board for me to practice and then try. I am so glad to see them start to blossom and really get into the leadership roles. When I first met them, being color belts several cycles ahead of me, they were both so timid and shy. Over time, they have started coming out of their shells, and are always asking me if I need help with my form, hold my boards for breaking, want to pair up with me for sparring, etc. I think part of it is that they trust me, thus request it from me, and of course, I don't have a problem complying. But I broke it after 2-3 tries. Not bad for a first time!

Instructor class was good. We did this one drill to show how to keep kids occupied who might be doing different forms. SW asked me to be an example of the camo thru red kids, like Drew, so I started jumping up and down like I was Drew, and it got a good chuckle from the group, as we all know how bouncy my kid is. The rest of the time, those of us competing were encouraged to help each other in critiquing any last minute tweaks. EL suggested that we pair up, and I did my CJ#2 for her, as that's what I'm competing with since I've only just started to learn Shim Jun. She said overall, it's very good, and that it was just some hand things like keeping fingers tight and such that I just had to remember. Coming from her, who's been on the tournament circult for a LONG time, and really knows what she's looking at, I took that as a compliment. And that was considering that I was doing my form in a very tired physical and mental state of being! So, I generally left feeling okay about what needs to be done for Saturday, even if I don't place, that I can give a pretty good showing.

I think learning Shim Jun will be good. You don't learn all of it in one cycle, like you did with color belt forms, but rather over two or three, which is good. But knowing me, I'll learn a lot of it quickly. It's times like this that I wish I could fast-track with my curriculum. But, more time to acquire the form means more time to get it right and fix the nuances as I go. I know I don't do it well right now. But I just was shown the first 15-16 moves (I think) of 80+ moves. And I tend to be a slight...perfectionist? Maybe that's not the best word, but close enough. Okay, I know I'm not great, but I do my best to do as close to a flawless job as I can. There's no rush in getting to my 2nd degree. I think I just don't want to be bored! I felt like tonight -- and Saturday too-- in learning this new form, that I have to sweep away the cobwebs from the part of my brain that needs to truly use my best cognitive abilities to keep track of it all. My brain hasn't been used like that in a while in TKD class, so while it's a little frustrating, I'm not down about it (yet), and I think the challenge is good.

Drew also had class tonight. I knew that there were a lot of kids in his class that were older, but I didn't realize how many of them were closer to 9 years old! He's REALLY young, and one of the lowest ranked in there, but he perseveres. I know they were doing an exercise where each kid had a segment, and he'd zone out when it ws his turn, and the kids were a mix of annoyed that he'd forget and those who were trying to help him remember, and I think he got frustrated with that. He didn't put the full effort he could after a while. But he continued, and didn't meltdown. He didn't put in the full effort he had earlier in class, but he still kept going. That in itself is progress. He also felt good because he did a front kick board break on the first try, which was good. He needs to start having some confidence in doing foot breaks, and I think he was getting frustrated on Monday when trying to do a sidekick. He behaved a little better with his SJB this week. I even practiced a little, and tried showing him a 360 release. He was getting the basic idea, as it's a hard thing to do. I still have to practice it! Sure enough, SW was showing the kids how to do it in class, so he had a slight head start. I didn't see him spar, but I get the impression from him that he's starting to improve with his control a little more. I could be wrong. But it's all little steps in the right direction. I'll take that over big steps -- or little steps-- in the wrong direction.

I guess now my TKD focus for the next few days will be making sure that I retain the amount of Shim Jun that I've learned thusfar, continuing to practice the SJB form, and keep CJ#2 fresh for Saturday. And as we say in both Cub Scouts and TKD, I just need to "do my best."

Practice makes perfect, or so they say

2007-11-05T23:36:00.000-05:00

Not much to report here. Drew had class today. He went into class in a dour mood, and came out, well, not as dour. I think the time change yesterday has thrown him, as well as his dear old mom, off. I think despite what he says, Drew does much better when one of the adults stays on top of him as he's learning his form. RA fixed a part of his form today, and he was doing much better as a result. I still try not to watch class, but I admit I still look up from time to time. He's having problems with the figure 8s with his SJB, but he's like his mom with that one. That one took me a while. He also finally started working on a sidekick break. It took him many tries before he got it, but he did. I made a slight fuss, but he said that was why he didn't like foot breaks, because he's not as good at them. I reminded him that sidekick ones were really hard for me too for a long time. He had one round of sparring, and he's continuing to improve, as his control is getting better. I think he's starting to grow up a little with that.

As for me, no classes tonight, but then again, I usually don't do Mondays. I sit and knit during Drew's classes. I started working on the heel of a second sock! ;-) But other than a few interruptions from SW and NM, I keep to myself. However, since I am still undecided as to whether I'm going to the regional tournament on Saturday or not (due to mild illness-- not sure if I have a sinus infection that I'm working through, and I feel like I have jet lag even though I haven't gone anywhere. Perhaps it's the time change too?). I spent a good part of my night practicing the weapons form. I mean, I don't have to compete in the weapons form, it's optional. However, I was state champ in weapons, so it'd seem kinda dumb not to compete. Naturally, it's doing a form I just learned and got the hang of the sequence in the last few days, I can't do one of the moves well (the inverted throw), and I don't have the footing well, and it's not my best weapon, so why set myself up for disaster? I guess I have to figure this out by the end of the week. :-S This is what's weird....I know I have to take my time doing this form. If I rush, I screw up more. That seems okay. The weird part is that I was reviewing the move before the inverted throw (around the world/lasso) into the inverted throw, and a few times, I'd practice it on my dominant side with my eyes closed, taking my time. I literally can do the blind throw blind, but as soon as I open my eyes, I start to screw up! What's with that?? Alternately, if I watch myself doing it in my reflection (I was checking myself in my patio door), I could get it. I dunno...I think I need more practice.

First Day of 1st Degree Training

2007-11-03T22:46:00.000-04:00

I haven't been to classes since the tournament last week. I just needed a week off, and with Halloween, the day I usually go, being closed for the day, I took full advantage of that. I don't normally go on Saturdays these days, but with a regional tournament in a week, I thought it might be prudent to at least get some more guidance in the weapons form.

But first, I started to learn my new poom-sae/form. I believe it's called Shim Jun, but I'll have to double check that, since that might be the 2nd degree form's name. I forget. There are 80-something moves in it, which is twice as long as Chung Jung #2, which is the last color belt form I did. I get to compete with CJ#2 for next week, because there's a 6 month grace period for new black belts, so believe me, I'm taking advantage of that, since mine is still newly minted! So anyway, I'm not sure exactly how they count the number of moves I learned today, but one of the biggest changes that you start learning as a black belt is single arm movements. Before, as a color belt, you had to do big reaches, and always do things with both hands. For example, before as a color belt, you'd "load" a back fisted punch by crossing your arms in front parallel to each other, and the bottom hand would extend for the punch, and the other hand would pull back to beside your rib cage. Today, one of the moves was a backfist, but the difference was that just the punching hand would load, facing in an inverted way from before, and you'd just pop the punch out and not move the other hand. That'll take some getting used to! But what we learned so far was fairly easy. I was told the next section was the more challenging part of it, so we'll see. I have to keep what I learned today in my head while still retaining CJ#2 for another week or so, so we'll see how that goes! I know hand and foot timing is more critical at this level too, so I can totally appreciate why SW harped on it so much, at least on me, when still a color belt.

We had a short break (2nd degree form class), and during that time BU, who was on the sidelines due to a sinus infection while his son WU took class, helped me start to work on the 1st degree SJB form. It's pretty easy, but it's remember the sequence of things, and some of the little things that go along with it.

After the break, then it was time for the 1st degree weapons class. There was another kid who got his black belt the same night I did (he was at an earlier testing), so theoretically, he and I would be learning the first half of the SJB weapons form for the next testing. When Ben, who was teaching, asked how much we needed to know or how much we knew, I said I knew most of it, but I had to learn the whole thing for competition next week. Ben raised his eyebrows, but understood, when I reminded him that I knew that basically if I knew the first half, the second half was the same thing in reverse, after all, and he agreed. So, Ben and I reviewed the sequence a few times, and then we went over the little nuances (foot timing in moving, for example), and I think after a while, I did get the hang of it. I think the major hangups I have are doing the inverted catch move (that's hard for anyone, but I could use the practice more so I don't think about it), and getting used to using the weapon on my left side, aka my less dominant side. I'm not TOO bad on that side, but some moves just feel awkward, that's all. But I think if I work on it every day until tournament next week, I should be okay.

I wasn't even going to venture into sparring today or board breaking. Well, we know of my love affair with sparring-- NOT! I think as long as I'm fairly limber and pace myself, I'll be okay in sparring. And as far as board breaking, I don't think it'll be a problem. One of the combinations that you can do involves three breaks, namely a front kick, side kick and round kick. The catch is that one of the breaks needs to be with the opposite foot of the other ones. Since most people do all of their breaks with the same foot, this presents a challenge. But for me-- piece of cake! Remember, I was already doing a combination using opposite feet for the promotion break to 1st degree, so adding another kick with the dominant foot will be nothing! Of course, I'll still have to practice these, but it won't be so bad. Another combination to choose is a knifehand break with a running jump side over 2 obstacles! I like the knifehand break, but don't think I'll be doing THAT one anytime soon!

So, my first true venture out as a 1st degree black belt in training wasn't too bad. Of course, I took it easy. I know one thing that concerned me a little was that Ben mentioned that with the idea of me learning my SJB form-- the whole thing-- in one week vs. 2-3 cycles, I'm going to be bored, and it's too bad that I can't just learn the whole regular form quickly, and promote faster, but SW really goes by the rules pretty strictly when it comes to promotion. I agreed, as believe me, I understand only too well what he's saying. But I reminded him that the new form will take some time to learn, and since that's pretty new, that will keep things interesting for a while, fortunately. And I'm used to being bored, but knowing SW, she'll make sure that boredom will be turned into how I can super fine tune my moves for competition. I know her. And that's not necessarily a bad thing. Ben had said to me and another kid during forms class earlier that in color belt, you may have been able to get away with some sloppy stuff (I wasn't), but as a black belt, you're not supposed to get away with any of that stuff, so learning the fine tuning early will help. I think I've already been trained with that mentality.

There's always your first time

2007-10-30T09:36:00.000-04:00

Having put so much emotional and physical effort into my black belt testing and interschool tournament, and since there are no classes on Halloween, I felt it was appropriate for me to take a week off from training. I think I earned it! And as I've mentioned, I'm not in a total rush to whip through my 1st degree curriculum as I was to whip through the color belt curriculum.

However, since it was one of the two "dress in your costume" days at TKD, and it was Drew's regular day to go, Drew had class yesterday. He was still a little bit on his high for helping out at the tournament as he had. I was a little pissed at SW, because I asked her if I could put in a star recommendation for Drew based on the fact that he helped as much as he did. She hemmed and hawed, but it came down to her claiming it would set a "precedence" (if I spelled that right), because usually helping out is supposed to be part of the tournament experience. And even at that, she said years ago it would be if they helped out in 10 rings, then they'd get a silver star. Well, Drew helped out with 3 rings, and I don't think we even had 10 rings for the event. I understand her point to a certain degree, but it's not often that a 6 year old Tiny Tiger helps out as well as he does. Almost everyone I know who has a small kid just goes home with their kid as soon as they are done. Drew wanted to stick around and help-- I didn't ask him to do that at all. I even had his Dad come to take him home afterwards when I had to stick around. So, Drew didn't get a star for his efforts. I did reward him with a new Hot Wheels car for his collection for his efforts, so it's not like he went totally without some sort of recognition. But it would've been nice if he had gotten some sort of commendation publically in class or something like that.

Anyway, class was going on as usual yesterday. The kids were getting a little riled up because of their excitement about Halloween. But they learned the first part of their new form, which was pretty easy. I looked at the DVD with the form on it later that night, and elements of it come back pretty quickly. Anyhow, Drew almost got his SJB taken away from him, because he was attacking another kid with it, and wasn't practicing what he was supposed to be doing. Not that the other kid was either. I was a little pissed, because there was SW schmoozing with parents rather than keeping on top of the kids. But I bit my tongue, because I could see what was happening, and I'm not supposed to go and yell at my kid, "Hey, cut that out and focus!" since that's supposed to be the instructor's job. Funny, she wasn't doing her job, and yet I know if had said anything, I'd get the dirty looks from SW to stay out of it. I can't win.

The kids put on their sparring gear. Drew even had his cup on under his one piece costume already! ;-) He was matched up with a boy who did very well at the interschool tournament the other night, and is at least a head taller and a little older than him. J is a fairly gentle, quiet kid. His mother, SV, is in my class, so I know how the family things, and they are a fairly mild mannered family. However, while Drew sometimes doesn't know control, in this case, J didn't remember. Drew does go in full force, but his full force is not as much as J's. And sure enough, it happened for the first time to Drew-- he got kicked in the head. There was no question that contact was made. I saw it, some other parents saw it, the student instructor saw it, and you heard it. JZ, the student instructor acknowledged that there was definitely contact, but she was pretty sure that it was more the shock of it happening that was upsetting Drew than actual injury. Drew was crying big time, so we pulled him out of class. J should have known better, as he's older, and has a higher belt. It wasn't so much that he shouldn't have kicked to the head, it was with the force that he did it. That would be like me kicking the head of an 11 year old. I would still kick an 11 year old in the head, but the point is control so that I don't clobber the kid. J didn't have that. Even Drew said that he felt that J was being too rough, and that HE-- Drew-- was trying to keep control of himself. That was a good thing for him to hear.

I gave Drew two options. I said he can either sit out until they switch partners, so he wouldn't have to spar with J anymore (I think he was afraid of him after that), or he can just sit out completely, but he has to still bow out, etc. He chose the latter, and that was fine. Turns out they only did one round anyway. The kids lined up, bowed out, and they they treated the kids to a piece of candy after class for Halloween. After class, SV came over to check on Drew, so I'm glad she realized that her kid was at fault. After we left, Drew said he had a slight headache, but I'm not sure if it was from the kick or from crying so hard, or just being hungry as it was dinnertime. I assured him that the fact that SV had come over to check on him showed that SHE knew that her son had been too rough, and that knowing her as I do, I was sure that she would talk to J about not being too rough on someone who is a little smaller and younger and a lower color belt than himself. I think Drew felt better about that, but it's one of those reasons that I am glad I'm always nearby in class.

So Drew got his first kick in the head. It's not a pleasant experience for anyone (and yes, even I've been kicked in the head a few times myself), so he'll learn to block, execute the move himself, and focus better on what he's doing. It's a hard lesson to learn. I just feel bad that he had to experience it so soon.

Just throw me to the lions, why don't 'ya?

2007-10-26T21:53:00.000-04:00

When you got to my TKD school, it is not unusual to be thrown to the lions, so to speak, to fend for yourself in a new situation. You won't always be left out to dry for TOO long, but oh, it's really hard. And being that I am a newly minted 1st degree, SW saw it fit, as mentioned in my last post, to do just that tonight.

Tonight we had our first Interschool Tournament for the year. I think it was a fairly decent turnout, considering it was Friday night and all. Normally Drew and I have Cub Scouts on Fridays, but since we didn't have a meeting scheduled for this week, we were able to participate. And participate, we did! It ended up being a very busy night for both of us.

I can't say a lot about Drew, because I was unable to watch his ring. SW had said that she needed to start training some more judges, and now that Sandy and I are black belts, we were being drafted. Sandy didn't come until later (as she had to bring her daughter with her), and Drew's ring and another ring were at the same time. So, since I couldn't do Drew's ring (bias as his mom-- you'd know I'd want to give him a high score!), I was wrangled into being a corner judge - for the first time!-- in a color belt ring that was comprised of Drew's peers. Most of the kids from his classes are a little older than him (by 1-3 years), and as he is not 7 years old yet, and they all are, the requirements are different. Drew, being a Tiny Tiger, only has to learn half the form, and he can have assistance with it from the instructor. WELL, at least according to Drew, he was awesome, and even did a great SJB freestyle. ;-) He was very proud of his 2 medals, and his new red fabric star for his uniform. He told JC (who came in case Drew didn't want to stick around all night waiting for me) that he wanted to stay and help, so Drew asked SW, and she said sure. Now, again, remember, he's only 6. So, they put him to work to be a scorekeeper during the sparring matches. They have flip chart-type things to show the score in the sparring rounds, and his job was to work the flip chart. Sometimes it can go pretty fast and furious, but he was able to keep up, surprisingly enough. In many respects, he was doing a Leadership job, even though he's not in leadership. I'm still not ready to do that. I still don't think he has the maturity for it yet, and I don't have the money for it either. Anyhow, he was really great, and he really enjoyed it. At the end, as they were handing out the medals to the competiting kids, he would help hand out the medals and doing the handshakes. I think he felt very important! :-)

But anyway, I did miss him competing. I'm sure he was fine, but let me tell you, he couldn't be any worse than some of his peers. Some of them definitely knew what they were doing. There were kids that were up there, older than him, who didn't have a clue! And they were competing for a rank placement, vs. Tiny Tigers all get some sort of reward for participating. Oh my gosh. Well, it was difficult enough. I never gave higher than an 8. I kinda kept most of my scores towards the middle. I think the lowest score I gave was a 4, because the kid didn't even know his form. I don't know that he choked from nerves. Our center judge, BP, even got up and ended up doing the whole thing with him. So, I didn't want to give him a zero. You'd really have to screw up to get a zero. Thus, in forms, I was a "hand" judge. Most of the kids were doing the same form as me, so I knew it well. It was truly subjective. The kids who seemed to have a very good sense of what they were doing got the winning ranks, and it showed. During the weapons part, it's all freestyle, so I didn't have to judge just one aspect of it, like "hands". Again, there were kids that did some nice stuff, some that had a clue but it wasn't polished, and then there was the kid who just wagged his BME back and forth for 20 seconds (because that's all you get). He didn't get a big score from me either. Oy. Sparring is where it's interesting. It's very different when you are on the sidelines sizing up the competition, vs. having to actually make the call! It's a lot harder than it looks. Half the time, someone else would call, "BREAK!", but I saw the hit, and I'd be able to make the call anyway. I was advised that when in doubt, either do a "no see" or "no points" if I'm not sure. It was a good competition with that, but again, you could see who was stronger and who wasn't. It was quite the experience.

After judging in that ring, MY ring was up. It was a menagerie of sorts. There were technically 4 different divisions in 1 ring, and even then, they combined us to be 2 rings in one. Three people were white/orange/yellow color belts, but all different ages. The other group was Sandy and myself, same age, same division. The W/O/Ys did pretty well for a first time out in the ring. Only one did weapons, which was good. I was always glad that I had started competing and testing with weapons early on, because now that I HAVE to do weapons, it's second nature. I don't even think about it. But of course, the competition was heated, as usual, with Sandy and I. For either of us, the worst we could do was 2nd place, after all. Nonetheless, I have to say that I really thought that Sandy would have the upper hand in most cases, seeing that she's generally more comfortable with the forms and her weapon form. I lucked out, because since I had just gotten my black belt a mere 2 days ago, I was allowed to do a freestyle. WELL, if that's the case, gotta bring out the award winning routine, even if I haven't dusted that off in 2-3 months! It was a little rusty, but I got about 99% of it out before time was called, and improvised the end. But first, she and I did the same form. Hers did look a lot smoother, there is no question of that, and I figured it might be close. I believe it was a close score - only a difference of 1 or 2 points. Weapons the same, but I didn't do that math that quickly in my head. As I said, I managed well, and I was sure that Sandy would smear me with her weapons finesse. She didn't catch one swing, but it wasn't as major as what ES was doing the other night (not by a longshot!). I think that's what might have been detrimental. Otherwise, it was a flawless routine. Then the sparring. I took the opportunity to break in my new black gear, and as much as I protested to SW that I thought the shin guards were too big, they were actually much better than the old ones I had before, I must admit. It was another really close match. Sandy made me work for those points right up until the end. She's getting faster all the time, and she is a mean puncher and can strike at all the right times, whereas I really depend on my kicks to get me through. Well, the move that did the trick was one of my attempted kicks to the head, my signature "move". Hey, gotta use my height to my advantage when I can, right? Well, this particular kick sailed directly over her head, and the judges called it a 2 pointer to me, as if I had actually made contact with her head. Their reasoning was that even though I hadn't made contact, she didn't make any attempt to block it either, hence the usual 2 points that are usually awarded for head kicks. That's what put me over the top. Otherwise, like I said, she made me work for those points right until the end. In the end, Sandy got 1st for forms, and I got 1st in sparring, as well as in weapons. I wasn't sure about the weapons, so it was a surprise! Later, Sandy was the solo XMA adult. I know she wanted me to do it, but I don't have a routine. I'd be purely improvising, and frankly, since she's a kick-butt juggler that incorporates that into her routine, I knew I couldn't compete with that. So, she got her other 1st place win in XMA weapons. :-) Maybe I really do have to start putting some XMA time in. I don't have to do anything that long, but I want to do something good. I half-joked that she can do XMA weapons, and I'll do open hand, and then we'll both be champions. ;-) I do also have to say that the other impressive thing about Sandy, that was especially evident in XMA, but also in everything she does, is that she's a lot more atheltic than people would guess her to be. If you look at the photo of us in my last post, you can see that neither of us are exactly looking like Elle McPhearson or Heidi Klum. You wouldn't think that two "fluffy" women like ourselves would actually be fairly decent martial artists and do well in competition. Well, Sandy has this forward roll in her XMA routine that I don't think I would even get close to attempting for fear of ending up with my face planted in the mats. Sure enough, she went to do it, with no hands put down, and did that flying forward roll right in front of the judges, and she sailed through the air and rolled up as if nothing had happened. It was the smoothest thing I've seen in a long time! So even if she had other adult competition, she would've blown them away. She's really awesome at what she does.

After that, there was one more ring that she and I were drafted to help out with, namely the teen/young adult black belt guys. This time, I was the corner judge in charge of feet. It was a slightly playful ring, as the guys had been judging all night, and it was late and we were all tired. Sandy kept score, so she got extra practice with that. It ended well, and it was late, so we decided to just go home.

It was a long night, but a good one. While I'm proud of my competition accomplishments, it was certainly a trial by fire having to help judge in two rings tonight. It really is a lot harder than it looks! If it was just judging like in testing, that's a little easier, as you don't have to give points. You just have to rate if it was excellent, good, fair, poor or just plain awful. Even in sparring, you judge that way, not in how many points you get. I guess now that I have a little experience under my belt, it'll be that much easier when I go to certify as a corner judge. We'll see. It'll just take some more practice, I'm sure.

But I think the one thing I'm most proud of, not how I held up during my first judging rings, or how I did in competition, was how Drew was tonight. He even told me he didn't cry tonight when he only got a bronze medal (all the kids in his ring got bronze medals), and the fact that he wanted to help, and he helped well, and maintained his composure and acted very mature in this whole thing. JC felt that he needs to be rewarded for this at home (we have a "chip" system where he earns chips for good behavior, and felt that Drew should get an extra chip, to which I agreed), but also at TKD. He already earned a red star on his uniform for participating. But I can tell you, he did more than any other kid his rank there, and he was the youngest one doing it. He helped with scorekeeping in *3* - count 'em! - *3* rings. That's really great! So, I'm going to see if he can get at least some sort of extra star for his participation in helping tonight. I'm sure that's not a problem, I just want to know which star is appropriate. I'm really proud of him. And I think as a result, he's taking more interest in doing this. He's already asking to do a regional tournament so that he can get a trophy instead of a medal. ;-) I made no promises, as the next regional is an hour away, and we'd have to be there VERY early in the morning. It's a long day. His dad would have to take him home after a while. It's literally an all day thing, from 8 AM to about 6 PM. I'm not sure if I'd be able to get away with leaving early-- I might-- since I have a little one, and technically, I wouldn't be certified as a corner judge yet. Although, I could be drafted for score/time keeping. :-S We'll have to see. Anyway, I digress. Drew is whom I'm proud of most. It's days like this that it's great to be a mom. :-)

Behold the Black Belt amongst ye!

2007-10-25T19:48:00.000-04:00

*WARNING: THIS IS A LONG POST WITH VIDEO AND PHOTOS, SO HANG ON TIGHT!*

Yes, you read the subject heading and the prior post correctly. I am now, officially, a 1st degree black belt DECIDED, otherwise designated in the ATA as a "1BD". Oh yeah!

Now, different practices/styles of martial arts have different timetables and methods to teach and have you earn your 1st dan/black belt. For me, it was two years, but it was a LONG two years. Last night was the culmination of all that blood, sweat, tears, pain, and injury that it took to get me there. But more on that in a minute.

There were two graduations last night. Let's do the one that came first, first. Drew finally achieved his camo belt, which was a long time coming! Had he been taking classes twice a week when he started (and before SW changed her policy), and he hadn't taken two summer breaks as well as a break last spring, he'd be a lot farther ahead in his belt ranking. But, the journey towards your first black belt is not a race, of which I am constantly reminded. It might be better in the end to let him go at his own rate, and that's fine. In the long run, he will really have great basic skills instead of okay ones by the time he's ready for his black belt testing. But that's still a long way off right now. Last night, he sealed the deal that he is officially in the intermediate color belt ranks.

Generally, I think he did well. He behaved well during the testing for the most part, so that was good. He's far from perfect, and yes, even with help, he still goofed up the half-form he had to do. But, his improved behavior in class and during the testing were the real progress made this cycle, and hopefully he'll continue to improve with that. And he's only 6, after all. As long as he has the concepts down, he's good to go. I will say this...I saw his scores for his sparring, and after you see the video, while he does get a little overly swirly, if he had made actual contact (graduation sparring is supposed to be no contact), he would have kicked the other kid's butt! He kept cornering the kid, and such, and yet I saw Drew had the lower score! The other kid barely kicked, and was constantly backing up, rarely on the offensive. I dunno...all that counts is that he passed, and he earned his belt, right?

So, onto the first video! First, Drew's form. Drew is the one who's starting in the center.

Drew doing 1/2 of Chung Jung 2

Drew did do a weapons form, namely a Jahng Bang/Bo staff freestyle, but it wasn't that great. It's optional to do weapons at his level, so he got a silver star for his uniform for doing it. But I had to get rid of something on the camera, as there wasn't enough memory to hold everything, so I dumped that.

Then, onto the sparring. Drew is the little one who starts on the right side of the screen.

Drew sparring

Then, when it was all said and done, a very happy boy with his new camo belt!

New Camo Belt! Yeah!

Now, onto the big event. My black belt testing.

It was just another rainy evening here in NJ, and your normal full house when it came to an adult/teen testing...

(I'm in the farthest back corner on the left)

Everyone had the usual course of having to show forms (poom-sae), weapons, sparring, and if needed, board breaks. I was very lucky to have my dear friend Sandy (and her daughter J) come not only to support me, but to be one of my official photographers/videographers. (My husband JC had the same assignment, but he didn't know what he was supposed to photograph as much as she did, so her video came out better overall.) So all video credits go to her!

I had to go at the same time as a very young 2nd degree, and ES, who is a 1st degree from my Wednesday morning classes. Now, in the first video, you see ES in the front/left, and I'm the huge Amazon in the back/right. So, here we go!

Chung Jung 2

Next, we did weapons. Now, all I had to do was drills, so it's nothing that exciting. But what's interesting to note, and I mentioned this on my regular blog, is that ES -- who's in the same position as before, is about 1-2 cycles ahead of me, thus she's already a 1BD. She's had weeks and weeks to learn her weapons form. She never did weapons at testings until she HAD to do so. So, here's the thing-- Sandy taught me the form that ES is doing in the video (not that you see it all) just yesterday afternoon for the first time. I learned it in about 10-15 minutes. Now, considering that, if I practiced yesterday afternoon, even *I* would have done better than ES, who's had weeks to practice. She kept dropping her ssahng jeh bang/numchakas, or not catching them. Well, as JC said to me, "I thought black belts were supposed to do better." As I explained to him, there are some like Sandy and myself who put a lot of time and effort to learn the curriculum and get all or as many of the nuances of what we have to know at that particular level, and there are those who only work on it during class, and do the minimal effort to get the minimum accomplished. And it shows. And it definitely shows in this video (and you don't see all of her weapons form).

Weapons

Next, we had sparring. Now, you may hear the judge for this event, the blond gal on the right (who happens to be a World Champion in XMA and a 4BD), tell us, "Show me your best moves, show me techniques you learned for this level, yada yada yada." This is always what I've done, but here I really had my chance to prove it. For me, being that this was graduation sparring, thus no contact, it was hard for me not to make contact. And as Sandy would attest, I've done graduation sparring where there's been PLENTY of contact, and been fine. But this was ES I was up against, so I knew even with no contact, I'd be fine. I'm the one in the back of the room closer to the wall when it starts...

Sparring
I swear that ES is doing the foxtrot or something during this. The camera cut off before we were done, but I got one good kick to the head where I lightly tapped her head. Oh, I wish it had been captured! There was no question that while I am the lower ranked one, I had more technique, if I do say so myself. ES was doing nothing but essentially dancing around. She should be able to beat me, but no. I did happen to get a sneak peak at our scores today at work, and at least SM (the judge) took note of that, because I score in the "excellent" range whereas ES was in the "poor" range. But ES still passed her progression testing (it wasn't a midterm, but you still have mini-midterms, and that's all she had).

We had some time to rest, which was good, because even after doing some extra control in sparring (it's a lot easier to actually do a full kick with contact than not), you're still tired. I was able to cool down just enough, and watch everyone else. There were only two of us who had to do board breaks. The first was a kid from my instructor's class who was going for his 2nd degree recommended ranking. He got his breaks in the first shot. I'm glad he went first, because just as we were being told that we were doing board breaking, that's just when the butterflies the size of condors started flapping in my stomach. So, then it was my turn. Here you go:

Board Break

Now, this is what happened, if you can't exactly understand what happened. My combination was a roundkick with my left foot, and then a reverse side with the right foot. I broke the roundkick with no problem. But I didn't get the right one because I didn't have the speed on it. When I went to set up for it again, since you have 3 tries, I was a little disoriented. Call it adrenaline or what have you. I am used to always doing that reverse sidekick in the combination, not "free standing". So, SW-- the one giving me directions, is pointing out that I was not positioning myself correctly for the break. I didn't feel I needed another practice, and just wanted to get it over with. Thankfully, it broke with that second attempt. I wasn't happy about that, because it meant less total points, but it was better than taking 3 shots at each board like at my last testing. At least this time, I had set myself up for success.

Finally, everyone lined up again, but this time by rank and not by height. I've worked my way towards the middle a little more now. After all the color belts received their belts, it was my turn-- I was the last to get a new belt. When I ran up, instead of just polite applause, I got a few whoops and hollers too, being that it was the people that knew me well and whom I've trained with all this time. SW had me take off my old belt, as she wrapped the double length belt around me.

Tie one on!

After she completed tying the belt on, I had to face the entire group, and she introduced me as the newest black belt to join the ranks. Then everyone bowed to me! Woo-hoo! I always thought that when that moment happened, I'd probably start crying. To be honest, I almost did, but I was able to choke back the tears. I got lots of high-fives as I went back to my spot in the ranks, and after we were dismissed, lots of congratulations and well wishes and hugs from many of my classmates who have supported me throughout the whole process. It felt really good. My family was there, my friends were there. Sandy was even kind and thoughtful enough to bring me roses, which were a big surprise! I was especially happy and grateful that she came. Ever since she and I became friends last year when she returned to the ATA, albeit spending the majority of her time at the other school initially, she made it more fun because there weren't any other adult close to or at my rank doing this. She came along, and she started out a little bit behind, but due to some workings by her main instructor at her school, she's about 1/2-1 cycle ahead of me, which is fine. I'm not that far behind. Our testing cycles just run differently, so she's about a month ahead of me. No matter! It would have been a very dull second year of learning without her being my tournament competition, and challenging me along the way to do better, and to feel okay that I didn't need to be like ES or some of the other ol' biddies that are there just muddling through. She made it fun when it could've been really dull.

So, now that we were both black belts, she wanted a photo! Of course!

Two Black Belt Buddies

And, I had to make sure that I had the obligatory photo with the woman who got me through all this, my instructor SW:

Me and SW
(Yes, I am that Amazonian height, and yes, even at her petite height she has a wicked reverse hook kick you don't want to get hit with.)

So there you go. And yes, I understand this is not the end, but the beginning. I've made it through the rigors of the color belts, and now have the true basics to be able to move onto bigger and better, as well as more challenging things. One thing I can say though now...I'm not in any rush for my 2nd degree belt! It would take another 2 years, if I went at the same pace as I have now, to get to that. I might take that long, or longer. There are plenty of progress and midterm tests between now and then, but I won't be changing rank, so no big deal. Drew is a little upset, as in jealous, that I have my black belt. But I've explained to him that he's taken breaks, and kids take longer to learn this stuff, but he'll catch up, I'm sure. He told me he'll have a 100th degree belt eventually, of which I have no doubt. ;-)

What's next you ask, other than continue in training? Well, there's an interschool tournament tomorrow, and I will have to practice my new weapons form quickly. I'm not out to win necessarily. I might, I might not, no big whoop. The worst I'll do is second place, after all, since Sandy is my competition! ;-) There's a regional tournament in November as well, but I'll have more time to get the practice in by then. But at least I'll be in a new echelon of competition ranking - 1st degree black belt, 30-something women. Oh yeah! Both Sandy and I are in that category now. I'll only be in that category until Worlds in June, and then I'll be in the 40-somethings since my 40th is in August. That will hopefully not have too many competitors! In either case, we'll both be up against some of our old contenders as well as some new ones, and being that we're all black belts, it's going to be a lot tougher, I suspect.

SW also approached both Sandy and I about certifying to judge in tournaments. You don't have to certify as an instructor to do so, but being that she's the RCT, I wouldn't be surprised if getting more judging help, now that Sandy and I are now eligible as black belts, is what she's after. Since I can't afford to bump up my certification/collar rank right now (both financially and, well, I haven't had the time to really review and cram for the cert tests), the judging one shouldn't be so bad. SW said she'd probably have a certification seminar and testing in December, and we could do that so we could qualify to get our judging chevrons (long patches put on our sleeves) as color belt corner judges. Both Sandy and I have done time and score keeping at both the interschool and regional levels, as well as competed, so we're ahead of the game in understanding the basics already. We'll see how that pans out.

After the tournament tomorrow, I'm taking a week's rest. We don't have classes on Wednesday due to Halloween, but maybe I'll go in that Saturday. We'll see. I think I need a small break.

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED

2007-10-24T23:57:00.000-04:00

1ST DEGREE BLACK BELT DECIDED

...more details later....

Less than 24 hours now...

2007-10-23T22:35:00.000-04:00

I have to keep a level head. I've been telling many people that tomorrow is the day I get my black belt. For the non-martial arts person, I can say that. But for all of you who read this regularly (and thank you for doing so, by the way), you know that's not the deal in reality. Tomorrow is the day I probably will get my black belt. There is no guarantee. It is all up to me, in the end, and very often, it comes down to the boards. If I don't break them, no dice. I've been able to do it, so I've been confident, but there's always a first time due to nerves or what have you. So yeah, I'm starting to get a little nervous, although in theory I shouldn't be. I know the material. I know what I have to do in order to get the job done. I know I can do what's expected of me. Is it that I'm nervous to do it in front of people? Not so much. Yes, my husband is coming to watch for the occasion. He rarely goes to testings. I think the last time he tried to go with Drew in tow was for my camo belt, and that was a disaster. He didn't even see me receive the belt because Drew was acting up. Drew now has instructions to go play in the back office if he's too bored. And the large majority of the people who will be watching are the same people who have watched me test through the ranks, who practice with me and learn with me on a weekly basis, so I know I've got a lot of support.

I have a lot of things going in my favor. And for the most part, I am confident that I can follow through on what I have to do. I've trained for this for two years. I've made adjustments to ensure success. So why, now at the almost literal and figurative 11th hour am I starting to have doubts and get nervous? I don't know. Maybe it's because I've seen people try and not succeed. I've come close to not succeeding myself a few times, but did by the skin of my teeth. Maybe it's just because I know that perhaps in grounding myself and finding some humility in what I have to do tomorrow, that is setting me for the path of being a true black belt. Humble, yet confident in many ways, and knowing I still have a long way to go, even though I've come very far.

Send lots of prayers/good karma/good thoughts my way. I'm going to need it, I think.

Getting closer

2007-10-21T22:47:00.000-04:00

At this writing, I am about 3 days away from testing. I'm not really nervous as of yet. I'm sure the butterflies will kick in just as I get there, I'm sure.

I haven't written like I usually do as I had a TKD related injury. I'm fine now, but it took a few days to heal so that I could type without it hurting! I'll explain in a moment.

We didn't have the usual Wednesday morning class, as SW was flying out to Fall Nationals that day, so I only had the evening classes, which was fine. Drew had his Wednesday class, and they did a practice graduation after doing some suicide drills. ;-) That's right, get them good and tired first! Drew was the first one up, as he was the only real Tiny Tiger, meaning that being the age he's at, he can still do only half the form and with the assistance of an instructor. Once he turns 7, he doesn't have that luxury. If he knew it all by himself, and the whole thing, then he could be eligible to go into the Karate for Kids program, and test like a 7 year old, but seeing as this is the first testing he's done in many months, I haven't pushed it. So, I watched as he did his half form with RA by himself in front of everyone, being the youngest one there, and the lowest ranked. Let me tell you, while it wasn't perfect, it was a lot better than I thought it would be! He did a great job! He still had some problems with his reverse hook, but considering that's an advanced move for a Camo belt (as it's a red belt/black belt recommended move), I think it's easily forgiven. He didn't wiggle or step out of place from where he should be. Later, after the older kids did it, RA commented to all ove them on how they were more wiggly and out of place than the 6 year old, and they should be able to do it as well as him, if not better. So Drew was actually getting a compliment and setting the example, which made him rather proud. I wasn't able to watch his weapons routine, but I assume he was fine. He plans to do his JB during graduation, and since it's optional and a freestyle (meaning he can't make any mistakes), he can get an extra fabric star for his uniform, which would be cool.

I took double classes, and we did practice graduation too. What was fun was that PS was back in class after a long absence, as she is hoping to start back regularly soon. Hooray! She's a lot of fun in class. We did some drills and such too first, and afterwards, we had NK and EL "judging" us. I am pleased to say that a lot of the finer details of things that I've been working on have paid off. They didn't feel I really had to do any extra tweaks at all, that I had nailed it. With my BME, I had to fine tune the "snake" move, but otherwise, it's good. It's just a hard move to do in the air vs. doing it with another person. We didn't do sparring, but being the only person who really needed practice with a board break, I did it. Got both breaks on the first try! Yay! During instructor class, we worked on teaching each other how to do different weapons forms. Since PS and I are closest in rank, even though there's a big of a chasm at the moment, I had drills to review with her, so I was teaching her the SJB drills and BME drills. I think she got the concepts pretty well, although I can't say how good a teacher I am with some of the more complicated moves. Part of what makes it difficult for her is that being that she works out from her sport wheelchair, there are still some things that are difficult because the chair gets in the way. I think one tip I gave her will help as she practices. It involved the SJB, and it was one I learned the hard way, but I think it will benefit her. She was accidentally clobbering herself with hers (thank goodness they are foam covered!), and she thought the chair was part of the problem. Well, the chair was, but the other thing that I learned, because I used to clobber myself in the head, and I have no chair, is that you have to keep your elbow up all the time. Kind of like doing it all the time with chicken wings. Seriously, I saw almost immediate improvement. I think with some practice, she'll have it in no time. :-)

I had to practice board breaking again. If I remember, I got the roundkick off in the first try, but not the reverse. I think it's that the kids were holding it too high and too far back. I did get it on the second try. So, I will have to make sure that my holders are not afraid, and they have to trust that I'm putting the boards in the right place. I know I'm tall, but they think my waist is about 5 feet off the ground, and I'm 5'10"! My waist isn't that high up, really, even if I do have long legs.

Then it happened. I, in turn, was helping hold a board for someone else, namely BU, who is probably the biggest guy in the school, and a 2nd degree. I am usually paired up with him often in classes, so I know his nature is to be gentle and not Mr. Macho, but he gets the job done too. So, I'm holding the board with another guy, and BU is doing some sort of reverse jump kick. My hands were placed (from my perspective behind the board) at the upper left and lower right corners. We locked the board out, and I know I locked my arms correctly. Then it happened. WHAM! Then some of the most intense pain I've had in a very, very, very long time eminating from my left hand. BU missed-- he hit the top left hand corner very hard, and it stung the tip of my left index finger, but worse, the impact severely injured the meaty part of my palm under my thumb of that hand. I had to walk away because I was in so much pain, and was trying to just calm myself down and not start crying in front of everyone, because no matter how much it hurt, even if it was broken, crying would be really embarassing, y'know? The pain radiated up and down my arm, especially between my wrist and elbow, and I couldn't get ice on it anytime soon. We did some joint lock stuff, but fortunately, my partner was sweet little MC, and she was patient and understanding that I couldn't do the drills completely, just one handed (literally). We bowed out, and I went to try to change my gi pants to my jeans, and I had to keep from screaming because I could barely move my hand. I could wiggle fingers, so I knew that was a good sign, but again the pain was so bad that I was tempted to drive straight to the hospital, which isn't far from there. I didn't. I just went home, and my husband had to help me with the littlest tasks. I iced it, wrapped it up loosely in an ace bandage, and loaded up on painkillers/stuff to help with the inflammation. By morning, it was a little better, and the swelling had gone down. I was getting more use of my hand, but it was very clear the following day, and especially two days later that I had this big black bruise on that meaty part of my hand. Thank goodness I'm a righty! The bruise is still there, but it's definitely getting better, thankfully. I have full use of my hand again, and it's just a little sore to the touch. I can make a fist again, and I'm not afraid of using it in sparring now! ;-) So, that was a little traumatic, but I'm glad that nothing is broken, and it's just a bad bruise.

So, tomorrow Drew gets one more practice class in, and I have one more practice class on Wednesday morning. After last Wednesday's reviews of how I was doing, I should feel pretty confident that I'll be fine. I just have to stay calm, and relax, because I know the material very well. I know what I have to do, and I just have to stay focused. I'll probably still get sick to my stomach before I start anyway. But I have to keep my eyes on the prize-- that long awaited, much anticipated, strongly earned 1st degree black belt.

Now, if we could only have him do that OUTSIDE of the do-jahng

2007-10-16T22:32:00.000-04:00

Yesterday's class for Drew went okay. I didn't see all of it (partially staying out of the way as usual), but I asked him if he punched anyone in the face during sparring, and he said no, but he did get too rough and backed off when told to do so. Still breaking with a palm heel, but for now, that's okay. Seemed to be following along, and I didn't hear anyone scolding him as much, or at all for that matter, so that's got to be good.

So, we are working with a counselor, as Drew has some behavioral issues that my husband and I are just having a really difficult time with him, and frankly, I'm burnt out. (You can read most of the gory details at my regular blog, if you are that interested. But fair warning-- it isn't pretty. Not for the faint of heart.) However, Drew has made some improvements at TKD in his behavior in class. There were times in the past whereby he'd have a meltdown and one thing would lead to another and he'd be kicked out of class. This year, there were a few occasions where he would just retract himself from class, and then go back in when he calmed down. Huge improvement. My husband, surprisingly, attributed that to the fact that the instructors there have known him, and they don't put up with any crap of any kind, even though they can be understanding too, and as a result, his respect towards authority is better there than anywhere-- even at home. So, even when the counselor is saying that perhaps we should take one class a week away as a possible punishment for behavior either at school or home, hubby agreed with me, and turned the idea around, that it was better that he stay in there, for the reason that it set a good standard for him. Hmm. While I always knew that TKD -- or any martial art-- would help to instill discipline, focus and respect in kids, I didn't think it was actually getting through to my kid entirely. Perhaps it actually is after all. It might be slow in getting there, but I guess it is, if even my hubby, who rarely sees Drew in action until recently, detected it.

Who knew?

Now, the trick will be, for him to respect and respond better at home and at school, and with the rest of the world. That's the bigger part of the picture. Nope, he can't stop or quit now. He might be on a roll.

One week until black belt testing, and I just want to get it over with and done!

I'm ready! Promotion! I'm ready, edy, edy, edy....

2007-10-11T15:55:00.000-04:00

(I think I watch WAY too much Spongebob Squarepants. I've seen the movie and almost every episode since time began. So that subject heading is supposed to be a la Spongebob, like in the Spongebob Movie. It also helps that Spongebob is a martial artist, you know, in kah-rah-taaaaay. ;-) Check out the end of this post for a little Karate Spongebob entertainment.)

Not much going on with TKD right now. I only took one class yesterday, as I was under the impression I had to go to this important Cub Scout meeting for the den leaders (like myself). The other Tiger den leader was under the same impression. It turns out that it was not a den leaders' meeting, but rather a meeting of the Pack people, and neither the other Tiger Leader or I needed to be there! Oy. So my usual triple threat of TKD classes could have still been possible. Oh well. I know for next time.

The Wednesday morning class is actually increasing! We usually have about 4 or 5 people there at most, and yesterday, we had about twice that! We have 4 W/O/Y moms now, and then there's Sandy, ES and myself as the 1st degrees (well, I'm close enough to that to consider myself that), and yesterday, 3- 2nd degree black belts, of which it was one guy! (He's a dentist that sometimes has the time to come in on Wednesday mornings. He's a hoot!) So that makes 10! I think we usually have another "player" or two in the group, but it was a big turnout! I think SW liked that, and everyone there is nice. It's nice, especially with the newbies, to have some new blood in the group, even though they are established moms at the school (their kids are all higher ranked than them). In doing drills across the floor, we concentrated in rechambers. While I think I'm usually good about doing them, it didn't hurt to be more conscientious about them. We then had to do some stretches on our side while laying on the floor, where we had to practice sidekicks from there. I had the right idea, however, after 20+ years of dance, I have way too much turnout, so as a result, when correcting my foot position, it felt like she was twisting my foot off counterclockwise. OUCH! It seems that I have to relearn to do everything turned in more for better foot position. I understand why, but for me, that's like the equivalent of me walking with my toes pointing at each other. It hurts! It took me years to stop walking like a duck and walk with my feet going straighter. Oh well. Between chambers and foot positioning, I have things to think about.

I did practice my form, and SW observed. She saw how I corrected some of my hand and foot timing from last week. She said if I could add these new tweaks with the chambering and foot positioning, I'd be dead on, both for testing and competition soon afterwards. But I've got what I need, and the tweaks I'm doing are just to perfect the form more. It's fine right now, so that's good. Weapons are the same, or at least she didn't correct anything with that. I was the only one there that really had to practice for board breaks. Everyone had a turn, but I went last because of having to do a double break. One thing that was cool was PT, the guy in class, practiced doing his axe kick. However, as a guy, he has to go through *2* boards as a 2nd degree instead of just one. Well, because I was the tallest female, guess who had to hold the boards with SW? Yup. Then my turn came. People thought it odd, but I chose two boards with nasty knotholes in them. Why? Trying to save the good wood for testing. ;-) I didn't break them on the first try, but did on the second try. And in the process, it turned out that the knothole defect on one board, the one I did my reverse sidekick on, had a really ugly defect on the interior of the board where it had been rotting. Ugh! As a result, it broke very crookedly, and I scrape the outside of my achilles heel on it. I thought it was just a little surface scrape until it started bleeding. Good thing there's band-aids at the school. It got under control with that, but the little spot still smarts today. Oh well. At least it's not the actual bottom of my heel!

Drew is still doing alright. I mean, I know he'll pass with help. Yesterday, he said he was tired and that's why he'd goof off. He was doing so badly compared to the others, and they were all older that I thought he'd been mistakenly been put in the wrong group. I was told (after asking) that they had actually split the group into two sections, and the back section of the group that I couldn't see were the kids that had no clue about the form, vs. those who did. So, Drew had a least a clue, even if it was incorrect, and it was with all the older kids who were much higher belts! So, in that respect, it was good. When JC picked him up last night, he said Drew was in good, or at least decent, spirits, so that's good. I think getting him back into TKD is a good thing, especially now that he's in a higher level class than before. It was too boring for so long for him. At least now he's being challenged again.

So that's the summary of the week. I'm ready for my promotion, for sure. I'm ready, I'm ready, promotion, promotion, I'm ready....

Keeping it all in the family

2007-10-06T17:47:00.000-04:00

This week has been a busy one as far as my TKD activities go. Wednesday was the crazy day, as usual, whereby I cram one class in the morning, and two at night. Drew had his class too. I also went to a black belt testing at another ATA school, which was interesting as well. Oh, and a Joint Lock seminar as well. So let's begin, shall we?

There's nothing in particular that I can remember about my classes, to be honest. It was pointed out that I didn't have proper hand-foot timing on 2 or 3 moves that were after the jump kicks and the reverse hook kicks. Easily fixed. I haven't watched myself, but I feel like as long as I can stabilize my knee with my knee brace, and not be too tired, I can do well with my form. And the sparring and weapons. Not the prettiest thing, doing BME drills. BORING! But, they are what they are, and I think I got a slight correction in one part, but again, it's an easy fix. The board breaks are coming along nicely. In the morning, I only practiced the reverse sidekick, but I still had to practice the round kick without the board, just so I had the rhythm of it all. That was fine. In the first evening class, I got to practice both breaks, and oddly enough, the roundkick break didn't do it on the first crack, but the reverse sidekick did! Go figure. (I did get the roundkick on the second try. No biggie.) Instructor class was more practice, and learning/helping the younger ones learn about how to discipline other kids in class who are being goofy. I think for BU and I in talking to the kids, it's easier simply because we are not only adults, but parents, so it's a little easier for us to come up with something.

I didn't pay any attention to Drew's class, just because I think he needs to do things on his own. I did ask SW if that class went better than Monday's, and she said generally, yeah, it did. The only thing Drew really needs to work on is not punching kids in the face when he spars. Good thing they have face shields on now! Even so, a)it's an illegal sparring move, b)Drew shouldn't be so rough, and c) it means Drew has to learn to control better, and that comes with time and coaching. He's only 6, after all! He also forgets his own strength sometimes, and the adrenaline kicks in, so again, he needs to learn control. It will be great to see him doing his form in a few weeks.

Thursday, I had to opportunity to go watch a testing at a different ATA school. EL was testing for her 3rd degree, and since SW is only one rank higher than that, she is not allowed to supervise the testing for that. So SW's instructor, KC, has to do it. KC's school is actually closer to me, and since I had the evening free, I could actually go see. What was interesting was that the testing was black belts only, whereas the teens and adults at my school, no matter the rank, all come at the same time. It was also done where several things were going on at once, and somehow it still took almost 3 hours! EL was the only one who was testing for 3rd degree. She did well on her forms, weapons and sparring, but unfortunately did not break her boards. We think that the main reason is that she is still adjusting from having done all her breaking from her walker (she has CP, in case you didn't know), to doing it in a wheelchair instead. And she just started that a couple of weeks ago. She was brave, even though we knew her disappointment, but she gets to try again at the next testing in about 8 weeks. PS and I had come for moral support, and we noticed a pattern. When Sandy went to test for her 1BD, it got cancelled and she didn't get her belt that night. On the new testing night, then she got it, but PS and I weren't there. With EL not able to break that night, PS and I teased that perhaps we shouldn't come to the next testing, because maybe we were a jinx or something. Oh well. (There were several others who didn't break for their ranks either, so she wasn't alone in that. But one little boy cried, and I felt bad for him.)We all went out to dinner afterwards, and had a nice time hanging out with SW, who assisted at the testing, and a former instructor at our school who used to be EL's physical therapist and brought her into TKD in the first place. So it was a nice night nonetheless.

Today was something a little different. As I said, I've been keeping it all in the family. Today was the joint lock seminar. I had done a lot of it before in different settings, but this was the first formal training I'd had other than in instructor class one time. The difference with this one was that I brought my DAD with me! He'd always do something similar to teach me self-defense when I was a kid, so I thought he might enjoy it, so I invited him to come. He was able to do almost all of it except at the end, because it would bother his knees, but it was only the last 5-10 minutes of the seminar, so it was fine. We never got paired up (DARN!), but we got to rotate partners. I guess I was considered the nice one, because I didn't try to rip anyone's arm off. RA, who was teaching it, had 4 simple rules, the 4 Ss-- 1)Safe, 2)Slow, 3)Slap and 4) Stop. In other words, for learning purposes, we had to be safe, and to do that we needed to do it slowly, if it hurt you should slap your leg or give some other signal, and remember to stop if someone else does that. Easy enough. There was one white belt mom there with her two boys (one of them being the one who kicked me too hard in sparring class a few weeks ago), and a new blue belt who just transferred in from another school, and then I was the next highest ranked. Everyone else were black belts. Oh, and except for my Dad. ;-) It was fun, and my arms are still attached and not broken. I got an email from my dad later thanking me for inviting him, because he had fun, and really liked working with my TKD friends who were patient and helpful.

Whew! I think that's a pretty full week for TKD! As it is, I won't be able to do triple classes on Wednesday, as I have to go to a Pack Leaders meeting on Wednesday night. I probably need the break, though. While I have a countdown now until my testing time (see the left column, and scroll down a bit), I'm feeling okay about my material at this point. I'm pretty anxious about moving onto new stuff, because IF I can make it that night, I have an interschool tournament 2 days later (if the Scouts don't meet), and I'll be competing as a 1st degree! SW said I'd learn the 1st degree weapon form for SJB in about 10 minutes, and she could review it the day after my testing by coming into work early before I left if needed. I know all the elements already, it's just the combination and a little bit of the footwork I need help with, as well as just a few moves I don't know. Well, if SHE thinks I can learn it that quickly, then, well.... So I'll have to pay more attention to Drew on Monday and Wednesday, and I'll still have my day class to practice. I think this will give me some time to heal up from all these triple nights!

MARK YOUR CALENDARS!

2007-10-02T13:44:00.000-04:00

It's official.
WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 24th, 2007
GRADUATION/TESTING

For Camo Belt Decided: Drew

For First Degree BLACK BELT Decided: Windsornot

Update to Missing Pieces

2007-10-02T13:43:00.000-04:00

Talked with SW. Nothing to worry about in the end. She said what happened was that Drew was actually doing very well in class, up until that point that he looked up. She had told him something he didn't like, and he had looked to me for approval, and I wasn't giving it one way or another. It was from that point forward that he only did his forms and everything in a half-hearted way. SW said she was actually very pleased with the way he was doing things before the altercation, and then even the fact that he didn't have a blowout, and kept going half-heartedly without making scene was HUGE progress in her eyes. She said that even when he had his little part to do, which was to yell, "SET!" at the end of the last segment, he did it in a way that was very leadership-like of him. She also said that at his age, she's not too worried about left or right foot as long as the general move is done, and if he were still doing that at age 8, then she'd worry. She felt that for a 6 year old, he's doing very well, and not to worry about doing the form more correctly, getting the moves for his weapons and taking the easy way out with board breaks. She felt that he's still doing well with sparring too, and just has to remember his control, but that has still progressed as well. His transition to upper-level color belt has been good. She felt that his attitude in class and his behavior has improved immensely, and she felt that was more important than the actual steps. The steps will come in time, and 6 year olds aren't always as coordinated yet, but attitude is everything, and he's made major strides with that.

So I'm relieved! WHEW!

Missing pieces

2007-10-02T08:43:00.000-04:00

Yesterday was the day Drew has his class, and as it's getting closer to testing time, SW was really putting the kids through the ringer. It wasn't bad, and the kids were calling her mean and evil, but she took it as a compliment. Little do they know what she's REALLY like when she gets mean and evil! Don't get me wrong, she can be really good with kids too, but when she lays down the law, it's grounded!

I normally don't watch Drew's classes and try to stay out, but yesterday was a little hard. I had my knitting with me, and was catching up with one mom I hadn't seen for a while. JR, her son, started TKD before Drew by a few months, and he's only a little older than Drew (6 months), but he hasn't taken any breaks, and he even got to the point where he *wanted* to move up full belts and know the whole form instead of half forms. He only has to know half until he's 7, but according to JR's mom, the last two cycles he's been doing full belts, so he's already a brown belt. Drew, on the other hand, granted, he's working on getting his full camo belt (bottom of the upper level color belts). If he hadn't taken so many and such long breaks, he'd be further along too. But I couldn't help watching Drew, as I think that he's one of the, if not THE youngest in his class, even if it's by a matter of months. He's also the lowest ranked one in that class. He's in the right class, mind you, but everyone there is at least 2 or more full belts ahead of him. And they are learning the hardest color belt form right now. But somehow, I felt that he wasn't getting the attention he needed when he needed it. And I'll tell you why.

As I watched Drew, he was making really blatant mistakes. And as SW watched all the kids, yes, some of them were making mistakes, but Drew was making the most and worst of them. Right off the bat, he's supposed to do a slow square block on one side, then shift his weight to the other side, and reverse it. He does the first half wrong, and the second half right. How can you not notice one set of hands going in the opposite direction from everyone else? It's things like that which were occurring. He was doing his reverse hook backwards too-- wrong leg, turning the wrong way. I mean, blatant! Now, I understand that it's a hard form. And it's his first time doing it, and he'll do it again probably this time next year. BUT, whether these other kids have to know more or not, I would think Drew should still get corrections, which he's not.

When it came time for board breaks, he got away with doing a palm heel break. Every class, I encourage him to try a new break of some sort. He doesn't do it. And nobody seems to push him to do it. I know he doesn't like change, and he's comfortable with that, and they were trying to make sure the kids who had to break for testing got their practice in (which were all but Drew and another kid). But still--I'm working at that place so I can afford to send him, and he's not getting that individualized attention he needs other than in disciplinary ways, and that not helping him progress. He did get a little wacky and rough in sparring, but it was quickly resolved, and even another kid (not Drew) was complaining that some of the other kids were being too rough and he had to sit out. Drew also had to be separated for weapons, because they are showing much more complicated stuff, and he's just not ready for that. They just tell him, "Okay Drew, work on your freestyle.". He doesn't know the form they've been teaching for freestyle. He just stands back there and plays with his JB. That's not learning.

I feel like I have to have a discussion about it with SW. I know she's can't necessarily personalize it just for Drew, but if there are things that he needs help on, and he won't let me help him, then he has to get it from her.

While I know she understands his needs very well, and is more capable of handling him than a lot of places, I sometimes wonder if he should transfer to Master C's. He doesn't realize that they are tougher on kids than SW is, but it's closer, and maybe he'd respond better to Master C's teachers. I don't know. I would think it'd be worse because they don't know Drew's history and why he does what he does, whereas my school knows him almost too well. I don't know. I think I have to have a talk with her. I don't expect Drew to be doing this perfectly, but I do expect him to have his form down a lot more closer to correct than what I see now. And while he's being challenged in some ways, he's not in others where he should. I don't know. It's rather confusing and frustrating to watch, knowing what I know.

ETA: I did send an email to her this morning, since I know I won't have a lot of time to talk to her when she comes in this afternoon, to voice my concerns. I really tried to say to her that I realize Drew is not an easy student, and I don't expect perfection, but he does need help and I'm not sure how to go about this. Hopefully she'll respond positively.

Breaking the pattern of failure

2007-09-27T14:16:00.000-04:00

Well, as you saw in my last post, a milestone has been made. I got to change my break for my black belt testing, which is not done often, and so far, it seems to be the better choice. But first, a slight rewind...

Okay, I think I mostly already talked about the morning class from yesterday, so I'll continue with the rest of the day. It's a lot when you are at the school for the majority of the day, and you are not even an instructor! After returning later after work, I was here for 3 classes-- one for Drew, and 2 for myself. I forgot my knitting so that I had something to do, so I ended up watching most of his class. He did have two small meltdowns which I was able to handle. The first was where SW wanted some more orderly conduct of all the students, whereby she didn't want anyone running on or off the mats to enter or exit class. She wanted her last class to exit the mats completely before Drew's class could walk on, and that's WALK, not run. Drew was closest to her, and she got a little stern with him, but it wasn't anything major, and it didn't apply ONLY to him. Well, he took it personally, and I had to get him back in, explaining that she was telling everyone, and only happened to stop him because he was closest to her, etc. He went back in, and was fine for a while until they were doing "suicide drills", which is where the kids have to run to another kid holding a pad, and they have to kick up their knees for 30 seconds, then run to the other side of the room, where yet another kid would be holding a pad to do 30 seconds of punches, then they'd have to go to the center of the room and do pushups and mountain climbers, and keep going until the instructor told the kids to switch. It's really exhausting, but I think Drew got out of the pattern and started to meltdown because he didn't want to do a part that he was told to do again. So, I had him come over, and gave him the option of a) going right back into class, or b) taking a 2 minute break, but then had to go right back in. He sighed and said, "Okay," and went right back in, and was fine for the rest of class as far as I knew. I had to start my 2nd class of the day while he was sparring, and his dad brought him home afterwards. But I did hear SW throw out two compliments to Drew while sparring, so I think he was fine after that. He really does like sparring, and he is pretty good at it for his age. He's not afraid to get in there. In the last 24 hours, he's also rediscovered the Power Rangers, so some of that is coming back into play, for better or worse. :-S

My second class generally went okay. It's nice when there's another adult (and a tall guy, at that) to do drills with, as he's about as limber (or lack thereof) as I am, even though he's a higher rank. Working with the kids is hard sometimes, because unless they are teenagers the same size as me, they can't handle the power that I put behind a kick or punch. Anyhow, when we broke up into groups for practicing forms, I was put with a green belt, since we are doing the same form. This would normally not be a problem, but I had to teach a segment. Actually, that wasn't the problem either, although I cannot attest to my teaching abilities. The student was exceptional, as in she was more the exception than the rule. The reason? I believe JJ has been diagnosed with Asperger's or she's somewhere on the autistic spectrum. I know she's been in special abilities classes as it is. Well, I usually don't have a problem with working with an SA kid. I've always loved working with the Downs kids who were in class because they are just so cute and willing to learn, and somehow I am able to connect with them. But the ones who can't always make the connection as fully are much harder. I did my best to slow things down, and give her examples, and do the steps with her. Every person, abled or differently abled, has a different way of learning. My problem was that I really didn't understand her way of learning, and SW had to step in to correct me once or twice in how to work with JJ. For example, in trying to show her how to do a back horizontal elbow, I started using the example of elbowing someone like her brother as if to say, "Back off, bro!". Well, she didn't like that, and her mom (thank goodness) explained that JJ doesn't like to think of hitting her brother. Okay, let's think of another way...okay, the door is stuck, and you have to bang it open with your elbow. Her mom seemed to think that was a better example. SW stepped in and just counted the steps out. :-S Oh well. Like I'd know that's what's best for JJ? Exactly. Any other kid, I think they would've understood the analogies. At least another one I did use to teach JJ the segment we had for last night was showing the platter of cookies or serving the pizza. When teaching what was supposed to be a reverse hook kick (the one I struggle with in the form a bit due to my own balancing issues), I just taught her a reverse side instead. She doesn't do a lot of stuff perfectly anyway, and the concept behind the reverse sidekick is the same as the hook, just more simplified. SW was okay with that. I apologized to SW for not doing as well as probably either of us liked, but she said it was fine, and that's how you learn, and with JJ, it is a little different, so I felt a little better. When we all did board breaks, since it's technically hand week, and I'm working on two kicks for testing, I just pulled out my plastic board, and decided, okay, let me practice another break I haven't done in a while. So AS held the board on his own (successfully I might add), and I did a knifehand break. Did it on the first try. :-) I've still got it! Sparring was exhausting, but I had some good partners, including JJ, EL and WU, which were all good matches for me for the night.

Instructor class was fine. I was the only regular employee there, so there was no meeting afterwards, but there was a good review of S#2 and the one-steps, and drills with those, then we worked on our own material. As you can imagine, working on my own on my form again was a little better since I could go at my own pace, but still tiring. I also working on my BME drills, which I have down pretty well. KC, one of "my girls" (the twins), helped me review my BME blocks to make sure I was doing them correctly if there was an actual opponents vs. just doing them in the air like in drills, to ensure I was doing them right, which helped. When it came to board breaking, I got the chance to work on this new board break combination again. We set up for the round kick, and no problem-- it broke on the first try. The reverse side break took two tries this time, but that's okay. Considering I had just learned it that morning, I thought that was pretty darn good. I also examined my boards. Both were as close down the middle as you could probably get, so I was happy. As I said yesterday, my confidence is surely restored, and I feel like NOW I can go to testing and not feel like there's a chance to fail. I was really quite fearful of this, to the point that I didn't know if I wanted my family to come and watch. If I broke, then great, but if I didn't, humiliation all the way around. That won't happen now. We get three chances to break the boards, so if I can easily break the roundkick one in one try, and do the reverse side one in less than 3 tries as I did yesterday, I'm going to be FINE.

The pattern of failure and misery is broken. Now I can more confidently work on getting that reverse sidekick down to getting in one shot, and the rest is fine.

Confidence restored

2007-09-26T13:54:00.000-04:00

Just a short post, as I'm bored at work (did my "to-do" list), but do want to share. I'd normally wait until later, since Drew has another class, and today is triple class day. (Yes, I take 3 classes in one day. I know, glutton for punishment.)

Today, feeling better then last week, I was able to get more accomplished. My knees are still bothering me something fierce, but I think it will be okay, since I've officially changed my board break. Now, normally, you wouldn't do that, but after yesterday's discussion with SW, I was glad she approved, and was ready to help me get into the swing of it in class today.

It turns out, as I described how I predicted my break would be, that THIS will work! My roundkick break with my left is much stronger now that when I had to use it to break for rank before (thankfully!), and with a slight foot adjustment on my foot positioning when I land, I can spin around and make that reverse side kick. So, I practiced on wood, naturally, since I want to test on that (and I'm allowed to choose), and worked on the round kick first. No problem. Still have that, which is good considering I haven't done it in quite a while. Then there was the setup for the reverse sidekick. SW is incredibly skilled in giving directions on what to do and how to tweak what you are doing. First try, missed the board entirely! I knew as I did it that I didn't pivot enough around and didn't kick straight back. Second try, I made contact, but it was off center too much. Third time was the charm. POP! It broke about as close as you can get down the middle on a first try. SW was pleased too, as she pointed out that considering that this was the first time doing this break, to break it on the 3rd try was pretty good. And so with that, my confidence is restored in myself, and I have a new board break combo to work on that I'm sure will be ready for testing in a month. SW did point out too that I think too much when I break, so she was directing me to just keep moving.

More later...but YAY!

Almost exactly one month and counting....

2007-09-25T22:24:00.000-04:00

Testing days are on October 23rd and 24th, and naturally, I'm going for the 24th. Prolong the agony as long as possible, and I usually have class at that same time, and with the busy week we usually have, it's better to just stick to routine as much as possible. Anyway...

Drew finally had his first Monday class. We got there on time and everything. SW was teaching, and well, she was a lot tougher than usual. I don't know if it's because things have become too lax for her liking over the past year that, as she said, she's being the "mean teacher/instructor" again, or if she was trying to impress this tough couple from South Africa that were checking out her style. Nonetheless, I was really afraid that Drew might crack at some point, that she was being too strict. Since I had to leave early to attend Cub Scout leader training (4 hours long with only 1-10 minute break! Yikes!), I actually watched class, which I normally don't do. She had them start out with an exercise which she's done with us older kids,;-), which is do a jab-cross with a kihap to her count, switch sides, reverse it, then do the same thing adding a front kick after the punch combo, and reversing. Much to my surprise, although it shouldn't have been, Drew did great! He didn't get carried away and silly, and his punches and kicks were strong. When he glanced my way, I gave him an approving smile and a thumbs up. He was happy. She also tried working with them doing the hook kick, then the reverse hook. Now, I understand the breakdown of how to do it, and in drills, I can do it. However, the reason she was teaching it was that it's in CJ#2. Sure enough, I have a hard time putting it into motion and making it look good. I've worked on it for 3 cycles over the past year, and it's never looked "pretty", or at least it never felt like it looked pretty. Anyway, Drew needed a bathroom break, and was allowed to go, and I had to help him because he had 3 layers on-- undies, jock strap (to put cup in later), and of course, his uniform pants. So I went with him just to help. Yeah, I'm that kind of mom. Soon after he joined back in class, and I had to leave. I asked SW if he was okay for the rest of class, and she said yeah, he was fine. Was concerned about not remembering where his gear bag was, but otherwise was fine. WHEW! He seems to be listening and holding up okay in class so far. He complains about going, but I remind him that he promised he would go in 1st grade, and once he's there, he's fine. I think also that having those weeks at fun camp where it was a battle of the wills and SW won, so he knows not to cross her because he won't win. That's part of what I suspect. I think they are also keeping him interested and moving, and that always helps. He seems a little more enthusiastic about doing it once he's there, and he likes to show off his skills. I wish he was more mature and that I could put him in Leadership, because if we didn't have the scheduling conflict with Scouts, I'd take him to do XMA, I mean ATA Xtreme. Maybe by the time we get to the point that he's ready for that, there won't be a scheduling conflict.

In the meantime, today I finally asked SW that dreaded question about the back elbow break, and the possibility of changing my board break for testing. She explained that the horizontal break was not a back elbow break at all, and that's why she enforced the one she does, and she doesn't understand why other schools allow that. It was at that point that SHE suggested trying out a different breaking combo. I was relieved! As I told her, I was afraid that she'd say that it was too late in the process to do that. She felt that it would be prudent, as she wants me to feel confident about my breaks and succeed. She felt that someone with my height and body shape/weight distribution, that the round kick/reverse side kick combo would work out better. It's a fairly common black belt rank testing break, but I hate to admit it, but she's right (she usually is about these things, and that's why she's the 4th degree and I'm not). Now, what makes things interesting is that most people break with the same foot on both of those. Not me. I break with my left foot for my round kick, but usually do side kick breaks with my right. While I will be working with her on how to do it properly, I was figuring out the timing and positioning of doing these, knowing how to do a reverse side kick, at least, and I think that alternate foot combination will work well. If I kick with my left foot, I naturally land with my foot in front, from which I would immediately be in the right stance to make that reverse body spin, to set up to kick behind me with the right. I really think it'll work, but we'll see when I try it out in class tomorrow.

Tonight, I talked with JC about the testing, and the breaks and all that. I told him that originally I had wanted to have him, Drew, my parents, etc. come to my testing, but now I'm not so sure because of this lack of confidence. Until I feel like I can do this break, I'm afraid of failing in front of all these people. If I fail, I have to wait until December before I can test again, and mentally and emotionally I'm not up to that either. I'm bored out of my skull with the stuff I'm working on. I have worked long and hard to have a mere board break hold me back. It sucks. He said he'd still like to come if he can, and I said I'll wing it. It's one thing to have Pen and Sandy come, as they've seen me during the trip up, so to speak, and they are classmates, so they know what it's like. But to perform for your husband, and your parents? Different story. And I hadn't told him this yet (but will as soon as I finish typing this), Drew has expressed to me that he's not happy that I'm getting my black belt. I don't know if it's jealousy or what it is, but he said it makes him unhappy that I'm so far ahead. Granted, I originally did start out behind him,but between SW changing her rules about when kids advance, and him taking breaks, well, he IS behind, and part of that is him. If he hadn't taken such long breaks, he'd probably be a blue belt by now, about halfway through the system or so. Instead, the next testing, he's going to be going for his full camo belt. He still has 6 more belts after that. Things will speed up a little more once he turns 7 next year (and bigger expectations), as he still only has to do half of the form now, but at 7 he'll have to do the whole form. That's if he continues to stick with this, which I hope he does. I'm not sure about how to deal with that. Part of my thinking is that I shouldn't have him come to my testing, and just go alone because it's been a trip all on my own for the most part anyway. Just do it under the radar, so to speak, without drawing a lot of attention to it for him. I don't know. I'm going to have to think about it.

So, tomorrow I will have to really limber up again, and work hard for this. I want this to work too badly. I don't want to be stuck as a 1BR any longer than I have to be. I want that 1BD designation too badly. I still have some of that cold, but I'm not as weak and feeling like a dead fish like I was a week ago. I need to push myself a little more. I guess that's what being a black belt is about.

Highs and Lows

2007-09-20T21:26:00.000-04:00

While I write this the day after we took classes, I must warn that I think I'm getting sick. I'm not sure if it's a cold or allergies or both, but instead of getting better, I'm getting worse. That fun runny nose thing and coughing, thus not being able to breathe.

Yesterday, I was feeling more run-down, and my chest hurt from the congestion, but the runny nose and coughing hadn't kicked in yet in earnest. I only took one class yesterday, since I had Back to School night for Drew, and well, that's more important than instructor class anytime.

Remember the two boys I said I couldn't stand, and the one who gave me the bad bruise the other day? Well, guess whose mother just started as a white belt in our classes? Yes, you guessed. Oh man. She seems like a nice enough person, but man, I've noticed that she's one of those moms who drops off the kids, then leaves, and picks them up after class, so she's never had any idea of what they do (and both kids are 1st degree black belts, and worse, just joined leadership, but they don't act or do things like black belts). So, she was paired up with the other white belt mom, who "outranked" her by a stripe already, SV, but SV has a better clue about things because she's stayed for classes more often with her son, who's still a color belt. Sandy and I were paired up, which is a good pairing always. And WS was on her own with SW, which was fine. We generally went over some drills, and then Sandy and I worked on our forms together, and then I worked on my weapons drills while she worked on her competition routines since she's competing in DE on Saturday. She's going to be fine, as she's very good. Then, we worked on board breaking. I got two pieces of wood out, as it was review week, as I feel I still don't have a handle on spacing between boards, etc. So, SW held the board for the kick, and WS and Sandy held the board for the back elbow break.

Now, I wasn't feeling good anyway, so I just wanted to get things over with. But then it started. WS wouldn't shut her freaking trap. She's telling me how to set up the elbow board, and I know perfectly well how to do it. SHE was setting it up wrong, at least as far as where the grain would go. She also kept holding it up too high. I'm tall, but I'm not THAT tall. She's not a usual board holder, so I didn't like her telling me what to do, especially after I was having problems. I would tell her to let me set it up where I want, and let me learn from my mistakes if the case warranted. There was even a point where SW firmly reminded her that there should only be one person correcting her, and implied that it was herself, which is absolutely true, and I knew that. WS doesn't seem to remember that more often than not, and it's maddening. Now, when it comes to holding boards, I definitely trust Sandy implicitly. I KNOW she knows what she is doing. Now, it was bad enough that the break just weren't happening, and I'm sure a good portion of it was that I just physically wasn't up to it. But the worst happened, and I'm pretty sure it's WS's fault, but not Sandy's in the least. WS kept raising her board, and I kept lowering. On my last try, I put a lot of power into it. Now, I might not have done the break right (the board didn't break anyway), but it was set so high that in hitting it, the bottom of the board bruised the part of my arm above my elbow, and then I have a brush-burn type scrape on my elbow itself. It's quite visible, believe me, and it's right where you would lean on your arm to rest it or prop yourself up with it. It smarts like hell! While there is a good possibility that I messed up in setting up the board, I swear that WS moved it at the last moment. I really do, because I'm sure I set it lower. I stopped after that, because it hurt too much, and I was tired. NOW...when it was WS's turn to break, she was complaining that *I* moved the board for her hammerfist. Being much more practiced than her in holding boards, I know I didn't. And I never said anything out loud about her moving MY boards. But I thought she had some nerve. I really hope that one of these days, SW will sit down with her, and despite WS being one of her higher ranked students in the school, will finally put WS in her place about the fact that she has no authority, no matter what rank she is, over SW or any instructor since WS is not an instructor herself. In that respect, I outrank her, even though I'm still a color belt, and I'm the one who's been taking instructor classes for a year and a half, not her. While she means well, she doesn't know what she's doing, and thus an injury, like mine, can occur. She constantly is also like, "Well, XYZ teacher has us do this...". My dear, this is ABC teacher, and who cares what XYZ teacher does. You do it ABC's way in ABC's class, and that's that. She really is getting on too many people's nerves.

So those were the lows. I'm fine with forms and weapons, it's this damn board break. I'm tempted, yes, even this late in the game, to switch breaks since I'm having this much of a problem. I don't want to wait another whole cycle if I don't get the breaks. That would mean December. No, I need to get it done in October's testing. I'm just too mentally and emotionally ready to move on to new material.

The highs are better. Not as "dramatic", but better. While we missed the Monday class for Drew, I did get him there on time for the Wednesday class. Again, I stayed out of the way. NK did pull me aside, and asked me if she did the right thing last week with him when he did have that moment when he pulled out. I assured her that everything was fine, and she was perfectly fine with what she did, and filled her in on some things that we are working on with Drew's communication to help her help him. She was relieved, and Drew started in class. There was one moment when I did pipe up, because he was supposed to be working on something on his own, and he was scraping the mirror with his JB, and he kept doing it. I was afraid of him doing damage, so I just piped up for a moment, but otherwise, I stayed out of things. JC came to pick him up when sparring started, as I had to go to the Back to School night at school. JC said that towards the end, Drew was pretty tired, and started to pull out of class without melting down. SW tried to get him just to keep going for 30 more seconds, but he just wanted to sit, and so he did. He almost forgot to bow out and made a slight fuss, but nothing too bad. So, again, I see that as progress. He tried to fight me about going in the first place, but I reminded him that he promised that in 1st grade he'd start going again, and he didn't argue the point after that. And once he was in there, I didn't hear him getting in trouble or anything like that, so I think he's starting to adapt again. At least he can't say it's totally boring, because a lot of it is new stuff for him. The only thing I did remind NK as well was that it's only his 2nd week back after a 6 month absence, and he's doing the hardest color belt form (figures, huh?), and he's probably the lowest ranked one in the class, so remember to give him some slack, and she was fine with that, and understood to talk to him if he showed signs of feeling stressed about it. He's off to a better start, I think, and that's good. He was also so proud that he did his palm heel break in one shot that night, which was a first, and the joy and pride in his eyes were priceless. I was proud of him too, and made sure he knew it.

So, we'll have to see what happens on Saturday, and which class I take. I should take board breaking only, as that's my main weakness, and sparring to help with the battle of the bulge, but I don't know what's going on with JC's schedule, and my elbow is NOT going to be ready by then, I'm sure. :-S

Good luck to Sandy at the DE Regional Tournament on Saturday! Kick some butt and take names, baby!

You know you're a bad employee when...

2007-09-18T21:27:00.000-04:00

You know you're a bad TKD employee when you bring your own kid for class, and you have the class time completely wrong, that he shows up 15 minutes before class ENDS rather than 15 minutes early. Such was yesterday. To be honest, other than the Basic intro classes for the pipsqueaks and the Cubs class times, I don't have the other times memorized. For some reason, I thought Mondays and Wednesdays had the same time for the upper level pipsqueak color belts, so I was rushing around trying to get dinner into Drew's tummy and get him out the door, only to find that the kids were working on weapons. Huh? I checked the schedule, and his class time on Mondays is an hour earlier. Crap. Well, so much for that! Drew was happy that he couldn't take class. I really can't take him to a makeup class this week, so oh well. He'll go tomorrow. I'll be missing some of my evening classes tomorrow due to Back to School night, so oh well again. I just hope I have the energy. I think I'm coming down with something. :-S

Should've just jumped in a pool instead

2007-09-15T13:47:00.000-04:00

While today is a lovely fall day, around the 60s with quite the breeze, my workout today was such that I ended up looking almost as if I had jumped in the pool with my clothes on.

Drew and I had made the agreement last week that Saturday classes would be limited to sparring and forms. Now, we know how much I love sparring, but since I'm trying to lose weight, and that's the most cardio class of all, I decided I'd take it with him. We got there, I got his gear on, then mine, and I was paired up with RG, whom I've mentioned before. He's a kid that I'm guessing is about 12 years old, and while the lights are on, nobody's home. Seriously. I know Pen knows whom I'm talking about, because we've wondered if he AND his brother JG don't have it all together, but RG is MUCH worse. He's one of those kids that you wonder if he's really a special needs kid whose parents are in huge denial. Seriously. (And I'm speaking as a parent of a special needs kid!) Anyway, RG's big problem is he doesn't do what he's told for the exercise, and he uses all power, no control. So for the drill, all we were supposed to do is do a round kick that the other person would block, and then it would be reversed, so the other person would do it. Simple enough. Now granted, it was an agility drill, but he just kept kicking me and kicking me. I couldn't block fast enough. And the kicks were twisted front kicks (that's not a legitimate kick), not a round kick in any sense of the word, and he was kicking too damn hard. I mean, even in a tournament situation or anything that we do, yes you can make contact, and sometimes it can even be hard contact, but it's not supposed to be "injure the other person because you're too rough and don't know control" time. Part of the whole exercise is control. I kept telling him that to fix the kick and not do it so hard, and he'd listen for about 5 seconds, and then it was back to what he was doing. There finally was a moment when I wasn't ready, and he walloped me in the arm. I did block, but I don't have forearm pads (nobody does), but I could feel that it was going to probably result in a really nasty bruise completely up and down my forearm. It was right on the bone. (And while no bruise has appeared yet, my whole forearm is still sore to the touch.) I said something to RA, that somebody was being a little too rough, and he assured me that we would switch partners soon enough. Thank you! I'm going to tell them in the future to not pair me up with this kid again. I lose my patience with him, and he's too rough. I don't need to deal with that. My next partner was WU, who is 13 and a sweetie pie kid from Leadership. Now, here's a kid who's a lot easier to work with, because he'll keep you moving and watching, but he has CONTROL, which is the whole key. He was patient with me, which he always is, and he was more interested in getting the sequences down than power. Hello, that was the whole idea! I'm glad at least ONE kid understood what was going on. Thank you WU! Next, I had little Joshua, who's Drew's age but has been doing this longer because he started a few cycles earlier, and he hasn't stopped on and off like Drew. He's my little buddy, but we had fun having to spar each other, even though he's 6. He's fast!

In the meantime, during class, Drew stopped and walked out of class, and he refused to join in. Bleeh. He stepped out, and then when he'd sit on the side still in his gear after a while, I told him he had to either get back in class, or take his gear off and put it away. He chose the latter. {SIGH} Later in talking to him, and naturally, I had to pull it out of him, he said Joshua, who was his partner, was being too rough. Rather than tell an instructor, he just walked out instead. He now understands that it's okay to say that the other person is being too rough, because while you are supposed to be learning power and control and the moves, safety is first, and I don't want him to feel that he's uncomfortable or unsafe.

It was then time for forms class. I wasn't going to take it because I know the form VERY well. And if I were to work on it, I would've had to have gone to the early morning classes for the 1BRs and 1BDs. He refused. Just flat out refused. GRR. I asked him, and again with some prompting, he said he felt uncomfortable in that class too, that he actually preferred being in the bigger classes. There were about 9-11 kids there, and he felt that was too small a group. Whatever. Maybe a forms-only class is too intimidating for him. I suspect that's part of the problem too. He said the class was too hard. So rather than force him and make a scene, I listened to what he had to say, and we packed up our things and left. Due to the busy weekly schedule we have, I had to make him choose an extra day instead of Saturday to go to classes, and he chose Mondays. So he has classes on Mondays and Wednesdays, and I have classes on Wednesdays and Saturdays. Tuesdays he has something else, and Fridays he has Cub Scouts. I think that accounts for a fairly busy weekly schedule, for him AND me.

In talking to Drew later, I think he's not feeling that confident yet about being back in class, and that's okay. The instructors are being pretty patient with him so far, especially SW. I've explained to Drew that it's perfectly okay for him to tell them it's hard, and that he's having trouble, because that's why they are there. If they are going too fast, then he has to tell them that, etc. I *know* they would take extra time to help him. I asked Drew if he'd want to come in the mornings with me on Saturday, and he could get a one-on-one lesson by himself with one of the teachers while I took my class, and he said no. He wanted to take classes with lots of kids. I think it's because it's easier to copy LOTS of kids than just a handful. I also reminded him it's his first week back, so it's going to take some time and practice. Practice is something that Drew really doesn't like to do. He likes everything to come to him instantly. I think that's an ADHD thing, because at his age, I was like that too. (Still am to some degree like that.) I know he's pretty good at this when he puts his mind to it, and I don't want him to feel as forced as before. I am trying to see how I can pull out what he's thinking more, have him articulate his thoughts better so we can help him succeed and progress. We'll get there, I'm sure.

So, Mondays and Wednesdays it is for Drew. We'll see how that goes.

Anyway, so why did I title this post as needing to jump in the pool instead? Because when sparring class was done, I was soaked. I had sweat dripping off my nose. My hair was so wet (and it's not long, but it's not real short like the guys either) that it looked completely wet. Even Drew noticed as I got off my gear how hot and wet I was. It was almost like I jumped in the pool, except my clothes, for the most part, still appeared dry. Now that's a workout! And something Becky would appreciate-- I was the only girl in the class. ;-) Hmm. Guess I should get used to that. I think the only reason I'll continue sparring classes, if at all if Drew isn't taking them anymore, is to get that good of a workout. I AM trying to lose weight, after all.

Bad Sushi

2007-09-13T22:38:00.000-04:00

(For those of you in the know, you know I HAD to give this post this title. LOL!)

Tonight was supposed to be Sandy's testing for her black belt. Pen and I arrived in the nick of time to watch it start. There were 5 student testing, and they did a quickie warm up, and then the instructor, Mr. S, (aka as CS,) called Sandy up to start doing her forms. Sandy performed IW#1, the first of her four forms she had to do, and after she finished that one, CS bowed her out, and excused himself, because he thought he was going to be sick. Oh great. So a few minutes pass, and no sign of CS. One of the other students in Sandy's class is an MD (as in, he's a doctor), so he went to check on him, and then HE was taking a while. Finally the last male adult student went to check on them, and came back telling us that CS wasn't doing well at all. Dr. N and CS came back finally after quite a while, and CS said that he was sorry, but they would have to reschedule testing, because he was just feeling too sick. So, there you go. No black belt for Sandy tonight. I think we were all disappointed, but under the circumstances, it was understandable. The thing was that a) at least we know he didn't get sick as a reaction to Sandy's form! and b)well, CS's nickname is Sushi (it sounds a little like his last name), so in that sense, hence the subject of this post being "bad Sushi". :-P I know, I'm too funny for my own good sometimes. heh heh heh

So, Sandy, her husband and daughter, Pen and I went out for dinner, and then Sandy's husband had to go, so it was us ladies just chatting the night away. We really had a lot of fun, catching up especially with Pen since we hadn't actually SEEN her for 6 months or so (although we've been corresponding via blogs and such). I think we could've gone all night if Sandy didn't have to bring her daughter home, Pen having to get back to college, and me, well, not staying out too late. (Although JC didn't mind.)

There are a few things that I concluded tonight. Sandy's forms make people sick. No-- I'm just kidding, Sandy! But seriously, both these ladies that are my friends are my friends, and in some ways my extended family because of TKD. I wouldn't have known them if it weren't for TKD. And man, we GOSSIPED all night about this and that with our do-jahngs, and info we had from various sources, but we also talked about other things too. It was the kind of night that I really enjoy, being with other adults who have some common interests, have a great sense of humor, and are smart and witty enough to indulge in some great conversation. I even had an audience for my jokes! ;-)

So, I'm still glad for my TKD experiences, because even if I'm not training, I have friends from there to spend my time both in and out of the class. That's cool.

Now, we just have to figure out when Sandy's next attempt at testing will be! In the meantime, my black belt was received in the school's mail today, and it's now hanging up, waiting to be earned. Just 6 weeks or so left of training....

Solo, and I'm just too tired

2007-09-12T23:13:00.000-04:00

You know I've said this before, but I'll say it again. Sometimes, I'm a glutton for punishment. Really I am. I also know when to say when, but still...

I started in the morning class, and I think I held up okay. We did this one exercise whereby we were doing partner stretches, where you put your foot on your partner's shoulder, and then you stretch as they stand up. Of course, I was paired up with Sandy, who is significantly shorter than I am. For her stretches, I had to do a lunge kind of thing for her appropriate height to stretch. For me, she had to almost lift my foot over her head! (Not quite though!) That stretching was great. It was reminiscent of ballet stretching. We worked on forms and weapons, and I worked on my board break again. This is "foot week", so I worked on the jump front kick that I have to do for graduation. Since I have to test on wood, I have to practice on wood. My main problem with that break appears to be that I don't chamber enough on the kicking leg, but I can continue to work on that. I got a good workout, for sure.

Today was Drew's first solo day in class. Just like the first day of school, I was a little nervous about how he'd be. I really tried to stay out of the way during class and felt I had to intervene only once, and it really wasn't bad, but rather just a re-direct. There was an across-the-floor drill that Drew had done quickly and sloppy, so NK, who was teaching, made him go back to do it again. Now, just so you know, she wasn't singling him out-- she was doing that to any of the kids who weren't doing the drill correctly. He got frustrated, but rather than have a total meltdown, he just went and sat in the front window ledge (don't worry, it's only about a foot or two off the floor), and he sat pouting, but not crying or anything. When he didn't come back to the front of the room to stretch, I went back and talked to him. He told me he didn't like the exercise, so he just decided to stop doing it and wait. When I asked him if he wanted to start back into class, he literally jumped at the opportunity, and joined right back in, which I was happy about. I "ignored" him for the rest of class. I stayed in this little nook of the do-jahng where I was with the other parents, but I couldn't see what he was doing because he was in the back of the group, or at least far back enough that I'd have to get up out of my place to see him even in the mirrors. After getting him geared up in his sparring gear, I was already late for my NEXT class, but NK said that she'd start and it was okay for me to change and get Drew ready first. Cool. So I did, and shortly after I changed, JC came in to pick Drew up. I told him where to put Drew's gear afterwards. SW told me later that Drew was very good and said to her, "Ma'am, my dad's here, so I think I'm supposed to go." SW assured him that I had just told JC that he had a few more minutes, and that it was okay. He complied with no problem. That was good to hear. I asked SW tonight later how he did, and she was satisfied with his behavior when he sat out, because he didn't have a blowout like he had in the past, because she'd rather he did that than the meltdown. She was also amused but pleased with him questioning when he was supposed to leave, but overall she was pleased with his behavior today. As you can imagine, it was a great relief to me! :-)

Well, as he was finishing up, and his dad was taking him home, I was starting my long night. We did some full situps. I can do lots of crunches like nobody's business, but to have someone hold down your feet and do full situps? Well, if you were minimally 60 lbs overweight and asthmatic, do you think it would be easy? I didn't think so. And it wasn't. But I got it done, and NK was my patient partner. We did some more drills, and I got through those, but again, very cardio heavy. We finally got to work on weapons and forms, some more. I finally learned the last drill for testing, which is a snake block/interception with the BME. It's where you block a #2 strike (hand to weapon), and then you loop your hand over and under the striker's arm, put them in a joint lock of sorts, and bop them on the head (or I did it on the shoulder for class safety) with the butt end of your weapon. It took a few tries, but I got the hang of it. Board breaking went okay, so I'm feeling okay if, again, I get that chamber in that kicking leg going. Sparring was very tiring. I think I lost a few pounds just in sweat.

Instructor's class was good. We reviewed some of those things I needed to do for my BME drills, which helped to reinforce the concepts, and so when we went to work on our own information, then I could just work on that by itself. I think I have the main jist of the drills, but there's no flow to it right now, so I think there are some adjustments that need to be made, but I have time for that. We went to board breaking again, and I tried to break on plastic to save some trees. I could tell after a few tries I was just too tired. After all, I was now on my 3rd class for the day, and 2nd class in a row. Just as I had made that decision, SW was ordering me to stop so I wouldn't lose confidence in what I was doing. When it comes to the jump front kick, I'm more confident in that break, even though that was the one I was having more problems with at the last testing, than the elbow break. I knew I was getting tired, and it wasn't going to happen. I haven't lost confidence in it yet, but yes, I will have to spend a lot of money on practicing breaking on wood boards. That's fine. I can live with that.

So, you can understand why I feel too tired. 3 classes at full steam (or as close to that) in one day! My knee and my feet were also starting to protest, so I'm glad that I won't be doing more until Saturday. Hopefully I will have lost another pound just from this workout. ;-) I'm more glad that Drew had a good start in regular class. I'm just hoping that like regular school, he continues to have a good start, and it lasts throughout the year.

Tomorrow is Sandy's big testing for 1BD, (and for you non-ATA'ers, for her full 1st degree black belt), and I'm confident that she's going to do fine. Her school is requiring her to do a LOT more than I'm required to do, and honestly, there are things, like her board breaks to pass, that aren't standard ATA curriculum at all. But, at least she's going to be ahead of the game in the end, and she'll be great. PS is going to be there too, so that will be great to see her as well! Big day tomorrow for her!

Busy First Week Back

2007-09-08T20:38:00.000-04:00

As mentioned, the family and I are back from vacation, and no sooner do we finish shaking out the sand in our sandals that we are back at school, and that not only means Drew starting 1st grade, but also me going back to work, starting TKD classes again, and Drew restarting TKD classes as well. He promised that he'd start back in September when 1st grade started, and he kept his promise without complaint.

Wednesday's classes were alright. WS (not to be mistaken for SW) was back again, after a short reprieve, and instantly was driving us nuts. Fortunately, I got partnered up with SV, who is a fellow mom and a white belt, and that seemed better. ES and WS got partnered up, and that was a better match that way too. I spent the better part of that class working on three main things. First, SW had me fine tuning some parts of my form, namely this one part of a roundkick/sidekick/double inner forearm block. The kick combination is one that I can do, but I find it doesn't look good unless I do it quickly, otherwise I lose my balance. I think it's the darn mats we have are too squishy. If I was standing on a truly flat floor, then no problem. But the bigger problem is, sure enough, that double inner forearm block. Theoretically, it's not hard to do, but I've been doing it wrong, so it's kind of hard to break a habit, but I was having problems with it anyway. It always felt awkward somehow. So, I was working on that. Next, I learned the "digs" for my BME form. Heck, I learned almost all my BME form for the first part except the last part, which is fine. The form-- or should I say, drills-- are the 9 strike lines, 3 defense blocks for a #1 strike, then these 3 "digs" which are blocks then disarms for a #5 strike, and 3 "snake" disarms, which I haven't learned yet, but I'm told that they are easy. Lastly, I went to work on my back elbow break. Well, let me tell you, I hate those plastic boards sometimes. Or maybe I was still fairly stiff and out of shape from vacation. No matter. I would step back into that back stance, pull back that elbow, and it would not budge. The first few times, SW told me my elbow was more out to the side than close to my body, but even after adjusting that, and ensuring I was in a back stance, she said I was doing it right, but somehow the follow through wasn't happening. Oh well. That was fine, and I understood that it's something I'll have to work on.

Wednesday night's class was very much a repeat of the last class I had before I left for vacation, but just more people in the class to do it. Each person had one step or move from the current beginner level form to learn (I believe it's Songahm #2) to learn, and then we did the whole form as a group, each barking out their segment. It's a method to use in a class when you are short on help, and at the same time teaches the kids how to be self reliant in learning the form as well. I practiced my form some more, and that was that pretty much.

Today was Drew's first day back in about 7 months. It's amazing how quickly 7 months goes by sometimes! Being that it's Saturday, that means specialty classes. Now that I'm a bootleg 1st degree BB, technically, I should be taking classes with the 1BDs, not the color belts. But because the color belts are doing the same form this cycle, I decided it'd be fine if I went to his classes instead. FINALLY, he's out of the white/orange/yellow classes and he's an intermediate level, so he can work on "big kid" stuff! The first class we both took is more Drew's favorite than mine-- sparring. I decided to take it because right now, I'm trying to lose weight, and heaven knows if you want to do some heavy duty sweating, take a sparring class. I was Drew's partner for most of the class, which was fine. It helped his acclimate back into the environment, and he seemed to hold his own when we had to get different partners to spar using the actual things we practiced. Next was forms class. Well, I know the whole form, and we were only doing the first 6 steps/segment 1, and the last section, which is the end. All the kids had seen it before except Drew, who'd only seen me practice it now and then at home. He actually held his own again very well. He made a few mistakes, but they weren't too bad considering, and he was able to keep up with the other kids. There was one part of the warm up for that class that he did start to get frustrated about. We were slowly building up to doing a #3 jump roundkick. He does them all the time unconsciously, but when they broke it down, he started to get a little confused. RA worked with him and said don't worry about doing 5 of them with the group, just do one with me, and I'll slow it WAY down. It took about 2 tries before he got the hang of it, and then he was fine. WHEW. Weapons class is where things started to break down a bit. Drew started okay with warmups, and was having fun, and then the group split into two groups-- JBs (bo staffs) and SJBs (numchakas). Well, I'm doing neither, and like I said earlier, I can learn the "snake" block later-- no rush, and I'm starting to learn the 1BD SJB form, but I'd be the only one, so I decided just to do JB with Drew, just to make sure I could keep tabs on him. Good thing I did. Ben P was teaching, and he taught us the first part of the "freestyle", but then he decided to make it interesting and taught us a helicopter move. Essentially, it involved just taking the JB in your hand with a spin above your head, but the JB spins in your hand as it's flat, so it's like a release move. You then stop the spin by simply closing your hand, and then tucking it under your arm. Well, Drew started to get it, but he'd drop his JB a lot. But then again, all of us were. Heck, I even whacked my nose at one point. Drew got very frustrated, and started to have a meltdown. I gave him the choice of a) stopping his crying and tantrum and just continue to practice until he gets better, or b) stopping class there and sitting quietly in the sidelines. He chose the latter. He did stay well behaved after that on the sidelines, and I did check to see if he had calmed down and wanted to start back, and he said no, and that was fine. At his stage of the game, weapons are still optional, not required at all, so if he felt he was better off not participating, then that was fine. It was one of those cases of me knowing when to pick my battle with him. He sat patiently while I took board breaking class, which he chose to opt out of again, and behaved himself. I chose to practice on some real wood (since I have that option at testing), just to see what would happen, and to hopefully boost my confidence again. It worked. It was a clean break, but not perfectly down the middle, but that's okay. It broke, and that's what counts! So I'm feeling better about that break. I think it's the darn plastic. And I'm not as stiff when doing my back stance as I was on Wednesday.

So, we survived our first week back, from vacation, and at all in Drew's case. I still have to figure out when to bring Drew for regular class during the week, and he and I decided that we'd only come for sparring and forms on Saturdays, as in the end, those are what's most important at his level right now. That's fine by me. I need to get his confidence back, get him in the swing of things, get his mental attitude adjusted that he'll cooperate and not have meltdowns during class. That's a tall order, but that's the goal. I really think he has a better knack for this than most kids if he can focus-- and not have a meltdown. I mean, we almost had two today, but we were able to reel him in enough, and prevent disasters. I don't want to take away from the other kids because of his behavior, and today, we were able to control that. But we got through, and as I reminded him a few times today during the various classes, he didn't need to worry about how good he was, because he's been away from it for a long time, and it was only his first day back, so he needed to take it easy on himself.

Let's hope this is the start of getting Drew back on track, and he'll not only make it through this first cycle and get his full camo belt in October, but that by the end of the school year when he turns 7, he'll be ready to start learning his full forms and be on the fast track to his black belt. (He should be, by my estimation, a full blue belt, I think, by then.)

Back from short break

2007-09-02T22:53:00.000-04:00

Hello all!

I just returned from a week long vacation in Myrtle Beach. I'll just say it wasn't that great a vacation, nor was it the worst. It had its good and bad moments. But oddly enough, as much as I've felt burnt out lately from TKD, I still made it a point to try to find the MB ATA (I found it, but it's a club, not a school, so I couldn't go and buy a t-shirt from them to wear to my classes on t-shirt days), and I actually practiced my form/kata at the beach at least once or twice. Not too bad, huh? I did have one night that was going so badly that I felt I NEEDED to be at a class. I had so much anger built up that I felt like that energy would be better off put towards a sparring match, or something like that. I actually was surprised at myself that there I was, taking a complete break, and I WANTED to go to class. So, I think that means that while I think I still feel a little burned out, I'm in a better mental state to go to class now. I'll probably start back in a few days, although I have to start back to work on Tuesday. Bleeh. But, gotta start back sometime...

Drew is supposed to be starting back now, now that's it's September. That was the agreement, and he's sticking to it. I decided not to start him right off the bat with the first week of school, but I'll start him on Saturday, and he and I can take the same class, as this cycle they are doing the same form as I'm doing now. At least that way he can get back into the groove with Mom alongside him. I know the form inside and out, but this will be, well, very much a challenge for him, even if he only has to learn half the form. I keep assuring him he's not in the "baby" group anymore, so it will be better. I hope he believes me! I would like to see him progress, as I think that getting into the swing of it again will be a good way of putting his energy into something positive, but I do think he has a natural knack for it, and without learning anything new, he'll never grow in the process, and he WILL get bored, as he did before.

So that's what's new.

Oh, and I couldn't get a photo, but I thought of John V's conversation about "Losing My Religion" while in MB, as we passed on one particular main street a sign for a school that promoted "Christian Taekwondo". I dunno, it made my husband and I laugh. We really didn't think a place like that would actually exist, but evidentally it does!

Until next time, when atrophied muscles are put back to the test again...;-)

At least it was Fun Week

2007-08-22T22:41:00.000-04:00

This is my last week of TKD...but not forever! Heck, I'm too close to that black belt, darn it, to quit now! But since Boot Camp is still next week (our boot camp is where you cram the whole summer's worth of curriculum in one week), this week and next week are Fun Weeks, thus no curriculum. Yay! Well, we still get elements of it, but nothing where we are learning forms or anything like that.

So this morning's class was actually a pleasure. We had Sandy and myself, both being called "the black belts" even though both of us are 1BR, as well as two new ATA moms that were joining. One, T, has a son who's been there for a while. I'm not sure what belt her son has, whether it's black or at least high level color belt. The other one, S, has a son that I remember I helped get her set up last year, and now her family has joined up, including herself. Well, by a strange coincidence, it turns out that Sandy and S knew each other in college, and that was 17 years ago and in NC! Small world, huh? I think because the 50-somethings weren't there, it was a fun class. Sandy and I watched our Ps and Qs to set a good example for the new students, and since it was fun week, we didn't have to really be learning anything in particular. We did some drills, and I did start to learn the beginning of the 1st degree weapons form, which is single SJB, as Sandy is learning it so she can compete with it in September. I'm still not sure if I'll be going to that DE tourney or not, but at least I'll know it if I should go to the tourney in November, and by that time I WILL be a black belt. We'll see. So that was fun for the most part.

Tonight's class was a similar tone. Since there were some kids who are still new to the instructor level of classes, she reviewed some information and how to teach it, giving each kid a different section to remember, and then each had to direct the group. My "part" was the bow in and bow out part. Easy peasy, lemon squeezy. ;-) In the end, however, once we reviewed the whole form once, I had the whole thing down, so I'd coach the kids in what THEY were supposed to be doing or saying. We then worked on the BME, and parts of the BME form, as certain moves are also part of my drills I have to learn as a 1BR. So it was good. At the end of class, I received this:

State Champ Certificate

So it's official. I am now truly the state champ for now. You'd better believe that this is getting framed!

SW asked who was serious, at least in the next semester, about moving up for instructor rank. I'm not sure. On one hand, I'm sure if I cram and practice the first three forms and one steps backwards, forwards and inside out, I could certify easily. I understand LifeSkills information very well-- heck, I sell it for her in getting people in the school. In many ways, I could be ready by December. But in some ways, I'm thinking I should wait a little longer, maybe until Spring when my life settles down a little bit more. I think I just have cold feet more than anything. It takes a long time for me to feel that sentiment of "Yes I can!" before I truly believe it. If you look at old posts here, you'll see that for a long time, I truly questioned what I had gotten myself into not only with doing TKD, then moving up to Masters, but especially moving up to Leadership and taking these instructor classes. I've now gotten accustomed to classes, and don't feel as overwhelmed. But at the same time, I still feel like the dumb ol' blonde, the ADD/SID person who is overloaded with information that she chokes before she learns it. It's terrifying. So I don't know what to do. But that's for another time to worry about that.

I'll be off on vacation for an extended week down south. We'll be driving down to SC starting on Friday, and not returning until the following Sunday, so that should be a sufficient break from life in all respects for a while. But I will bet you that between the pool, the ocean waves and beach, I'll probably be practicing forms anyway at some point. ;-)

Until then, my friends....